


Please come home

by emmadilla



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Chuck has a small foot fetish, Destiel in the background, F/M, First Time, Foot Fetish, Hate to Love, Loss of Virginity, Penis In Vagina Sex, Sabriel in the background, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-04
Updated: 2018-03-26
Packaged: 2019-01-09 03:22:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 60,710
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12267861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emmadilla/pseuds/emmadilla
Summary: Gonna swallow my pride, say I'm sorry/stop pointing fingers, the blame is on me/I want a new life and I want it with you/If you feel the same don't ever let it go ... I'm down on my knees, begging you please come home ...AU/Canon divergence - Chuck has returned from spending time with Amara, and is now looking to reunite with the soulmate he created for himself. Problem is, during the time he was gone, she was misplaced, and her soul was born on Earth. Chuck enlists the Winchesters to help him find her, but reuniting with her is the easy part. He'll find that she does not think very fondly of him, and for good reason. Can he melt the ice between them and bring them together?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've had this pot stirring for a while and finally decided to start writing it down. I hope y'all enjoy this as much as I will!
> 
> As with most of my fics, it accompanies a song quite nicely. This time it's "On Bended Knee" by Boyz II Men. I recommend giving this song a listen either before or during reading the story. :)

It had been nearly a year since Chuck had disappeared with Amara, eleven months and twelve days, to be exact, and surprisingly nothing super weird had been popping off. Vampire nests here and there, a demon possession or two, nothing too stressful. Most of their runs lately had been of the standard salt and burn variety. All things considered, the Winchesters were practically _bored_. As such, Dean declared that they should take a little time off, let other hunters deal with the little problems while they relaxed. It was only fair, he insisted, since they had stopped the literal apocalypse multiple times now (and also started it, which Sam would point out and Dean would subsequently brush over with “That’s not the point …”). So, Sam had relented, and they had spent the last couple of weeks in the bunker, doing as they pleased. Sam was still cataloging some of the lore books and items he’d found in storage, which usually turned into him reading a random book while sitting cross-legged on the floor. Dean washed all of the cars in the garage, paying special attention to baby and giving her a nice wax job by hand. When that was done, he turned to music and cooking, making use of the freezers by cooking up large batches of simple food and freezing it, so they would have something available on down the road whenever they got busy again. Fast food was nice sometimes, but nothing beats home cooking, at least according to Dean.

 

Because of the drop in supernatural activity, it came as a surprise when out of the blue, Chuck showed up, seemingly out of thin air. Dean almost dropped his glass and as he worked to recover said, “Hey, Chuck. So, uh, how did your little heart to heart time with Amara go?” He hoped that Amara wasn’t pissed off yet again; they barely survived the last round.

 

“It went very well, thanks for asking,” he said as he stuffed his hands in his pockets. “I’m actually here because I need a favour.”

 

Sam and Dean both stopped mid-chew and exchanged curious glances at each other. Just what did the Almighty want with them? “Uh, sure, Chuck,” Sam replied. “What is it?”

 

“I need you to locate someone.”

 

Dean put his burger down and swallowed the bite that was in his mouth. “You want us to do what, now?”

 

“I need you to find someone for me.”

 

Nope, he had definitely heard correctly. “Uh, okay … I’m sorry if I seem overly rude but, why can’t you find this person yourself?”

 

He chuckled. “Just because I’m God doesn’t mean I’m all-knowing and omnipotent. I’m very powerful, yes, but the Christian Bible exaggerates some of my qualities. Thus, I find myself asking you two for help. If it’s any comfort to you, I’m very confident that you’ll be able to help me.”

 

Nodding, Sam said, “Alright, let me grab my laptop real quick.” He disappeared for only a minute or two and was back with said laptop in tow, powering it up as he took a few more bites of salad. Once it had booted up, he asked, “So, who are we looking for?”

 

“Female, between the ages of 20 and 40. Her first name is Kismet, I don’t know what surname she was born into. Um, she’ll have red hair, green eyes, by now she’d be about 5’2” …”

 

“Any idea on place of birth, even just a general area?”

 

Chuck shook his head. "The documentation was unfortunately damaged, the most I could make out was that she was born in the U.S.”

 

Sam raised an eyebrow. “Well, that’ll make this a bit harder, but okay,” he said as he started plugging in values.

 

“So who is this person, anyway?” Dean asked.

 

Chuck took a deep breath before he replied. “She’s my soulmate.”

 

That stopped both brothers dead in their tracks. They were silent for a moment, absorbing his statement before Dean finally spoke up, “Say what, now?”

 

Chuck nervously rubbed the back of his neck as he explained, “You see, before I left heaven, I was working on something, or rather some _one_. I’d left her soul there while I was gone, thinking it would be okay, but it got … misplaced …”

 

Dean’s brows furrowed. “Misplaced? How does one misplace a freakin’ _soul_ , I mean … it’s a soul, for chrissake, not a set of car keys or a phone!”

 

“I don’t know,” Chuck interrupted. “And I don’t care to know the details, the point is she was misplaced and was accidentally born here on Earth, far earlier than I’d planned, and I need to find her.”

 

Sam was still stuck a few points back. “God has a soulmate?”

 

Chuck looked a little sheepish as he replied, “Well, yeah. I mean, I was lonely, I needed somebody. Adam had Eve. I needed somebody, too.”

 

The brothers actually felt bad for Chuck, despite everything that he had put them through, and Sam assured him, “Don’t worry, we’ll find her. It might take a little while, but we’re on a break so nothing pressing grabbing for our attention.” He flashed what he hoped was an encouraging smile, “If she’s out there, I’ll find her.”

 

While Sam ran his search and ate, Dean offered Chuck some dinner, which he accepted. It was just a burger and some homemade fries, but God wasn’t too picky and gladly accepted the meal, along with a beer. There was a question nagging at Dean, and he finally asked, “So, how do you know what her name is? I mean, once she was born, wouldn’t her parents have named her?”

 

Chuck swallowed the bite he had taken before he explained, “Well, _I_ was actually the one who named her, and since I named her soul, her name carried over. I don’t do that a whole lot, but if you ever hear about parents who take a look at their newborn baby and a name just comes to them, even if it’s different than the name they picked out? That’s because their soul already had a name attached to it.”

 

“Huh,” was all Dean could say at the new information as he continued to eat on his own burger.

 

“Okay, Chuck …” Sam said, looking up from the screen, “I have a compiled list here for you to go through. Kismet isn’t a common name in the U.S. but it’s unfortunately not rare. Is there a way to narrow it down any more than that?”

 

“Unfortunately, no,” Chuck replied. “Are there pictures? I’ll know her if I see her.”

 

Sam nodded, “Yeah, I can pull up their drivers licenses, make it a list for you to go through, just give me a second.”

 

Chuck nodded as Sam went on typing commands into the computer, seemingly not pressed for time, though Dean thought he was surprisingly nonchalant about finding someone so important as a soulmate. If he’d been in God’s position, he would have been tearing the Earth apart to find her. But, Chuck was not Dean; Chuck was far more patient than Dean could ever be, a patience born of eons of existence. Minutes, hours, days … they meant little to nothing to him.

 

As soon as he had the list compiled, Sam pushed the laptop towards Chuck. “There’s the list, just hit the arrow keys to navigate.”

 

Chuck nodded in understanding, thanking him before he started going through the list. The brothers finished off their dinner and eventually retired to the next room over while Chuck slowly ate his meal and scrolled through license pictures. One hour passed, then two. Two eventually became three and the Winchesters were starting to feel a little antsy. What if she hadn’t been born in the U.S.? What if the parameters were wrong? What if his soulmate was the _one person_ who didn’t have a driver’s license for whatever reason? It was hard to concentrate on much when they knew that God was in the other room pouring over records, trying to locate his soulmate.

 

Finally, they heard an “Aha! Found her!” from the other room. They both rushed in to Chuck’s side, Sam especially eager to see the results and Dean just happy that this little side venture was over.

 

Sam pulled the laptop over a little bit to pull up information on the person that Chuck had picked. “Alright, let’s see here … Kismet Montgomery, 29 years old, lives in Fridley, Minnesota …” A few keystrokes later and he’d pulled up even more information. “Looks like she works for Cartwright and Associates as an executive assistant, has been there for the past five years, before that she worked as a clerk at Target Corporate, and … well that’s strange.”

 

“What?” Dean asked.

 

“Well, I have history for her going back about eight years but before that … nothing. No school records, no other jobs … uh, she got a GED when she was 21, other than that no other indication of schooling. If she didn’t have a birth certificate it would seem like she didn’t even exist until eight years ago.”

 

Dean stared at the picture of the redhead on her Minnesota license, pondering what this could mean. With his experience in their line of work, people weren’t just born and then disappear until adulthood, not without something fishy going on. Something was off, but he just couldn’t put his finger on what. He glanced at Chuck, who sat beside him, and asked, “So this is it? This is her?”

 

Chuck nodded slowly, looking at her picture as if he was entranced. “Yeah, that’s her.”

 

Dean pursed his lips. “So, how do you wanna play this? Breaking the news that she’s God’s soulmate isn’t going to be the easiest thing in the world.”

 

Chuck pondered on it for a moment before he decided, “I think I’ll have Gabriel fetch her.”

 

“Gabriel?” Sam exclaimed, “Really? _Gabriel_?”

 

There was the distinct flutter of wings before, “Somebody say my name?” They looked up to see the trickster archangel standing in the corner, sucking on a lollipop.

 

Sam turned back to Chuck. “You really want to send Gabriel after her? She probably doesn’t even know about the supernatural and you want to literally send Loki to get her?”

 

“Hey, now!” the archangel protested, “I can do it!” He paused a second before he asked, “What am I doing?”

 

Chuck smiled at him. “You’re going to go get Kismet.”

 

An almost wicked looking smile crossed Gabriel’s features. “Well hello, Mommy.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, so, I was writing this chapter and it got kinda ... long. So I decided to split it into two chapters, and chapter three will be posted pretty much immediately after this one today. Consider it a treat! LOL
> 
> Also, both chapters are written in Kismet's first person POV. I'm not sure if I'll throw in more chapters from Chuck's POV or not, but just wanted to give fair warning!

I struggled to open the door, laden down with paper bags as I was, but I refused to take more than one trip bringing in groceries. It was one thing to own a home and be able to bring in groceries from the same level, but I was in a third floor apartment, and while there was an elevator available, I was not going to waste my time going back and forth from the underground parking to my apartment. Thankfully, my kitchen was just inside the door to the left, so I didn’t have too far to go once I got in the door.

 

I set my bags down on the counter in a huff, pushing my glasses back up my nose before checking the time and groaning. I would have been home sooner, but I had put off grocery shopping for too long, and while I hated to go shopping after work in Twin Cities traffic, I would need something to eat tonight, and if I was going to spend money, I might as well stock up instead of getting take out. Sighing, I threw my frozen items in the refrigerator and stuffed the refrigerated food in their designated spots. _At least it’s Thursday. Just one more day until the weekend._ And one more weekend to enjoy until I was ass-deep in work, helping prepare Mr. Hughes for the conference the week after. I would have to compile reports for him so he could present his department’s progress and answer any questions regarding ongoing projects. It might not sound like much, but for the architecture executive it encompassed a lot of work. The rush of work only happened once per quarter, though, so it wasn’t really too bad, on average. Most of the time my job was pretty cush. I had it pretty decent, truth be told. I had a nice salary working as an executive assistant for one of the nicest executives in Minneapolis in one of the most secure architecture companies in the Twin Cities. I had a nice, one bedroom apartment in Fridley, just on the outskirts of Minneapolis. I was making more than enough to sock money away, which I’d been doing for some time, and one day I would buy a nice house that was all my own. I was definitely on the fast track for success, despite my start in life, but even with all of that, there was still … something … that felt off. Like something was missing.

 

Sure, my love life wasn’t all that illustrious. I hadn’t gone out on a date in several years, and I hadn’t had one serious boyfriend. It felt odd, to be almost 30 and still be single, but in this day and age it was becoming more and more acceptable to stay single, so I didn’t get bugged about it that much. Still, it would be nice to have someone …

 

I brushed off that line of thinking as I finished filling my cabinets and folded the paper bags, storing them under the counter to be either used or recycled, whichever came first. Standing in my kitchen, I pondered for a moment what I should make before settling on the obvious and setting the oven to 450. While it was preheating, I chopped up some squash, zucchini, onions, and tomatoes so I could roast them, figuring on pairing the roast vegetables with a nice salad.

 

After the vegetables were nice and done, I threw together some raw veggies for a salad and poured on a small portion of vinaigrette before turning on the local evening news, KDKA. One of the many things I loved about living in the Twin Cities is that even though this was a major metropolitan area, the local news stations still acted like small town news stations, laughing as they interacted with each other and trading jokes on air instead of acting stiff and somewhat unnatural.

 

As the news wrapped up, I gathered the dirty dishes and stacked them in the dishwasher, prepping it to run. I was incredibly thankful to have one, as I loathed to wash dishes, something that I’d been forced to do for _years_ before I finally got out on my own. As I closed the door and set up the cycle, I heard something … odd. It sounded like fluttering wings, but seeing as I didn’t have a bird it was a sound that was out of the norm. I shrugged and figured it must be something on the TV, but as I turned around, I stopped short, seeing a tall blond man just standing in the middle of my apartment. “What the fuck? Who are you? How did you get in here?”

 

He just smiled and I felt something twist in the pit of my stomach. “You need to come with me,” was all he said.

 

“What? Why? I’m not going with you …” I said but he covered the distance between us in only a few steps and before I could protest further, he reached out and grabbed my shoulder, and that was it.

 

As soon as he touched me, it was like I was surrounded with blinding lights swirling all around me. I still felt his grip on my arm, but I otherwise felt weightless as I blinked, trying to _see_ , even though there wasn’t much I could see, not even the strange guy who just _appeared_ suddenly in my locked apartment. The whole sensation didn’t last very long, maybe a full ten seconds tops, but during it all I could hear the sound of wings, the same sound I’d heard in my apartment.

 

When the swirling lights finally receded, and I successfully fought back the nausea that threatened to send me heaving, I noticed that we were definitely not standing in my apartment anymore. Instead, we were in a long room lined with shelves that were brimming with books and a couple of tables between the aisles to read at. At one end of the room, standing in the doorway that looked like it lead to an exit, were three men, all of them more than capable of towering over the blond. I breathed out carefully, adjusting my glasses as my eyes darted between all of them. “Okay, what the fuck just happened? Who are these guys?”

 

The tallest one with brown shaggy hair spoke up next, “You didn’t tell her? _Really_ , Gabe?”

 

“Hey, I was just told to go get her, Sammy boy.”

 

The answer only seemed to frustrate him. “Well she obviously doesn’t _know_ … _you know_ …” He made a hand gesture to indicate something that the blond must have understood, but I wasn’t about to let the facts get waylaid by an argument.

 

“Wait, hold on, time out here,” I broke in. “Where am I? And what is it I don’t know?”

 

Before anyone could speak up, a voice came from the other end of the room, the end we weren’t facing. It was a soft voice, but loud enough that we all heard it. “Kiz.” I turned to see another man standing there, his curly hair just barely tamed and his beard hinting at his age with a few flecks of grey. “We need to talk,” he said simply.

 

_This is it. I’m going to die, aren’t I?_ I thought, but despite that my feet carried me forward as I followed the man down the hallway and into an adjacent room. _Well, if this is it, I suppose I had a good run_. I jumped as the door closed behind us, and I saw the blond had followed us. The other three guys had not, and I was curious as to who they are and why they were here, but that only brought me to wondering where _here_ was and why _I_ was there and who _these two_ men were. I hoped I would at least get some answers before I bit it.

 

Beard guy regarded me for a moment before he remarked, “You’re awfully calm for someone who just had their first angel ride.”

 

I wasn’t sure what he was getting at with _angel ride_ , but I assumed he was referencing whatever drugs I’d been given to render me unconscious to transport me here. Granted, I didn’t know what the fuck would have made me hallucinate swirling lights and make it seem like barely any time had passed, but I wasn’t exactly well-versed in the world of drugs, so I didn’t doubt there was something like that out there. Regardless, he was right, I was calm. Almost unnervingly so. I shrugged as I replied, “I guess when faced with death, some people just accept it.”

 

He smiled. “You’re not going to die.”

 

I did feel a tiny bit of relief, but then again I still didn’t know who this was or if I could trust them. “So then who are you? And why am I here?”

 

“My name is Chuck, and …” he took a deep breath, pausing for a moment before shaking his head and saying, “… well, there’s no way to really beat around the bush. I’m God.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here's chapter three, almost immediately, as promised!

Something in my mind felt like it misfired. Did he really just say that? No. No way. There is no way he really just said what I thought he said and _meant it._ Nope. Maybe the drugs were still having an affect on me. “Right …” I replied. “And I’m the archangel Gabriel.”

 

“Actually, that’s me,” blondie volunteered.

 

“Because of course,” I said, laughing. “Of course. I gotta say, this is the most entertained I’ve been in probably a while now, even with the whole kidnapping thing.”

 

“It’s the truth,” Chuck said.

 

“That you’re _God_?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“God doesn’t exist.”

 

He shrugged. “I gave you free will, so you’re certainly free to believe that. But it doesn’t make me exist any less than it invalidates the fact that you are my soulmate.”

 

Okay this was starting to go a little too far. “Oh! You’re looking for a wife! So that’s why you had your little friend here drug me and kidnap me?”

 

He looked over curiously at Gabriel, who threw up his hands in defense. “I didn’t do anything to her other than bring her here. Promise.”

 

“Oh yeah, it’s totally normal to hallucinate swirling lights and wings flapping.”

 

“Kiz,” Chuck said gently. “You weren’t drugged. Gabriel flew you here.”

 

I laughed again. “This is ridiculous. This is crazy. Angels and … and _God_ … they don’t exist. They’re just fairy tales people tell to keep others oppressed.” As I was talking, I noticed Chuck start moving toward me. “Hey, what are you doing?” I asked.

 

“Proving who I am,” he replied simply as he reached up and plucked my glasses off my face, rendering the whole world fuzzy except for his face, which I realized was because he was standing uncomfortably close to me.

 

“Hey!” I protested as I went to step back, away from him. “I need those to see!”

 

“Not anymore you won’t,” he said as he laid a hand on the side of my face and I felt frozen for a moment as the oddest, almost out-of-body experience type of feeling swept over me. It took a few seconds at least to recede, but as it did I realized that the world was not only not blurry anymore, but it was incredibly sharp and detailed, far more than it ever was even with my glasses. Chuck stepped back as I looked around the room, the floor, even my grey speckled sweater dress to see details that I had never seen before. There was no excusing this on drugs, whatever he did it was clearly … not natural.

 

“What just happened?” I asked, softly, almost in a whisper, still in awe of how well I could see.

 

“I healed your eyesight,” Chuck replied casually, as if this was just an every day, normal thing for him to do. He smiled as he held up my glasses, “I take it you’re seeing a lot better than you ever did with these?”

 

I nodded, slowly coming into the realization that a _lot_ more was at play here. What exactly it was, I wasn’t totally sure of yet, but it was clashing with a lot of preconceived notions and ideas I had, ideas I’d held for years based on personal experience. If this guy _was_ God … well, I could possibly do something I’d been wanting to do for years. But first, I wanted a little more information. “So … you’re God.”

 

He nodded. “I prefer to be called Chuck, though, it’s much more informal.”

 

_Right. The God of the universe likes to be called Chuck. Because of course he does._ “And I’m here because …”

 

“Because you being here, on this earth right now, is a mistake.”

 

My blood ran cold for a minute. “I’m a mistake?” I asked, trying to suppress the quiver in my voice.

 

“No, no. _You_ aren’t a mistake. It’s just … the timing.” He sighed. “Let me back up a little.”

 

“Please do because I feel like I’m getting more confused.”

 

He paced a little, as if he was nervous - _why the hell would God be nervous?_ \- as he explained. “It is true, I created … pretty much everything. Angels, the earth, animals, humans. Even though I let them go through a normal evolutionary process, I had a pretty good idea of what the outcome would be. The thing is … through most of that, I did everything alone. And I got to a point where I just didn’t want to be alone anymore.” He paused in his pacing to look directly at me. “That’s where you come in. I created you specifically to be my soulmate, so both of us couldfeel the same happiness and fulfillment I’d created for mankind. But …” he looked away, biting at his lip, “…but when I was finished, I didn’t feel ready. Not that I didn’t want you, but that I felt I wasn’t good enough for you.” He took a deep breath as he continued. “So, I left heaven for a long time and lived on earth, just trying to figure myself out and … and just be better. To be worthy. For the longest time, I didn’t think I ever would.” He looked at me again and smiled, “But the Winchesters helped me. Not directly, but they helped reunite me with my sister, and the time I spent with her made me realize that I was ready.”

 

I nodded, mostly following along, but I still had some questions, questions that were burning inside of me. I resisted the urge to spew them all out and simply asked, “So what does this have to do with me being born at the wrong time?”

 

“Well, when I was gone, I assumed you would still be safe in heaven, in stasis. But, things happened in my absence - lots of things - and your soul ended up getting misplaced and was born much earlier than I’d intended. I didn’t even find out about it until about a week ago, after ransacking every corner of heaven looking for you.”

 

I almost laughed again, fighting back tears, as I asked, “So what now?”

 

He smiled as he stepped toward me. “Now that I’ve found you, I can take you with me back to heaven. I can fix this mortal body, make it into an immortal vessel, like mine. We can … we can be together, finally. Just as I’d intended.”

 

I couldn’t take this anymore as I snapped, my hand shooting out and slapping him firmly across the face. I didn’t know if he would smite me or not, but I didn’t care, not anymore. This was my chance, my chance to truly tell God what I thought of him. And I was not going to pass it up. “And just what makes you think I even _want_ anything to do with you?” He looked shocked, hurt even, but I hurt worse. “You really think I’d just follow you blindly like a good little girl? After everything that’s happened to me? After everything that I _went through_? The things I’ve _suffered_ , things that were done to me _in your name,_ by _your followers_? Do you have any idea what people are doing to other people, saying that it’s in your name and that they’ll have a place in heaven? Or do you just not care about all the lives they destroy?” I hadn’t realized that the volume of my voice had gotten louder until suddenly I was shouting, tears running down my face. “Fuck you. I _hate_ you.”

 

I felt just a tiny bit like a bratty teenager as I flung the door open, letting it slam against the wall as I marched down the hall, tears still streaming down face as I angrily made for the only exit I’d seen. I figured, though, that I was more than entitled to it, considering everything that I’d gone through, everything I’d suffered at the hands of the _cult_ I’d grown up in … yeah, I was more than entitled to my reaction. I didn’t even care if God got angry and decided to smite me, it had been well worth it to slap him. If he was going to end me while I was on my way out, I would consider my life fulfilled.

 

As I rounded toward the long room with the shelves of books, I accidentally barreled into one of the guys I’d seen earlier, the one that was wearing a trench coat and suit. “Sorry,” I said as I stepped around him. Just because I was infuriated and pissed didn’t excuse bad manners.

 

“Where are you going?” he asked of my retreating figure, but I didn’t reply. I just needed to get out.

 

The other two were still in the room I’d left earlier, though not quite in the same position. They moved out of my way as I stormed past them, thankfully leaving me alone as I made for the stairs on the other side. It looked like I was actually home free.

 

Until blondie suddenly appeared in my path.

 

“ _Seriously_? What the fuck?” I said, trying to get around him, but he simply moved to block my path. “Let me go, _Gabriel_.”

 

“Just hear me out, okay?”

 

I chuckled in disbelief that he was demanding that I listen to whatever he had to say, but I crossed my arms and said, “Fine.” If this would get me out of here, then I would let him say whatever he wanted to me.

 

“Look, I don’t know what you were taught about him, but if it was based on the Christian Bible, it wasn’t true.” I snorted but he went on, undeterred. “The Bible exaggerates a lot of qualities.”

 

“Oh really?” I said, my question slick with sarcasm.

 

I wasn’t sure if Gabriel understood my question was not genuine or if he simply ignored it as he went on. “He is powerful, certainly. Not all powerful, not even the most powerful being in existence, though he’s pretty high up there. He doesn’t know everything, though. He doesn’t see everything that happens. And I don’t know where they came up with him being omnipresent, but he’s still just one being who can only be at one place at a time.”

 

“So why are you telling me this?” I asked, wanting him to get to the point already.

 

“Because you’ve obviously been mislead about him. And it wasn’t right, and it sucks that that happened, but it doesn’t change the fact that he _is_ different than what you’ve been taught.” He looked me in the eyes, pleading. “Please just give him a chance.”

 

I took in a deep breath as I actually found myself contemplating it. Ordinarily I would have dismissed it outright, would have said he could go fornicate with a cactus for all I cared and that I wanted no part of this. But … something in me stopped that line of thinking. Maybe it was because I was tired, maybe it was the shock, but I found myself sighing as I said, “Fine. Alright. Now, are you going to let me leave?”

 

He smiled. “Of course.” Instead of moving out of my way, though, he gripped my shoulder again and I was once more plunged into a deluge of swirling lights and wings flapping. I stopped with a lurch, valiantly holding down my dinner as I looked around and saw that I was indeed back in my apartment. The TV was still on and the dishwasher was still running as I looked around, anchoring myself before I let it all out.

 

Everything that had been done to me, everything that had been said to me, and everything I’d been forced to do and everything I’d felt all of a sudden came rushing back. Things that I hadn’t thought of for years were suddenly at the forefront of my mind, and it _hurt_. It hurt like a wound that had been ripped open yet again, bleeding as the nerves around it felt like they were on fire. I collapsed on my bed, ignoring everything else as I cried out my anger, my rage, and my hurt, unaware of exactly when I drifted into a troubled sleep, the whole night blurring together in one giant haze.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, I needed to give Kismet a little break, so this chapter will be from Gabriel's POV, since the little bastard of an archangel has been needling in my brain lately. Prepare for a tiny bit of crack and slight meta.

Gabriel leaned back in a chair in the bunker, twirling his angel blade while he sucked a peppermint between his cheeks. The week before had all been a hectic “go go go!” kind of mentality, but this week it was all a waiting game. Chuck had tracked down Kismet and met her, _finally_ , but she had wanted nothing to do with him. Gabriel figured he couldn’t blame her too much, after what she went through after her soul was born on earth, but still … he smirked as he remembered her slapping Chuck. He had admittedly wanted to do the same for a long time, but even he wasn’t that stupid. Or brave. The girl had balls, he had to give her that. Not just anybody had the gumption to smack the Almighty after they had been properly introduced.

 

Of course, as much as he had enjoyed the amusing display, at the end of the day, Chuck was still Dad, and it hurt to see Chuck hurt like that. And, like a good son, he had deemed himself the one to mediate on his behalf, convincing Kismet to give ol’ Chucky boy a chance. It took a little waggle of the silver tongue, but she relented before Gabe flew her back to her apartment.

 

However, that was Thursday evening. Chuck had called her the next night, to see if she had anything planned for the weekend, as he wanted to sit down and really talk to her, explain things, let her talk to him, but she didn’t answer when he called. He waited anxiously all weekend, but by Sunday evening she still hadn’t returned his call. He called her again Monday, but again it went to voicemail after several rings. By Tuesday, he was starting to slip into a depression, which meant by Wednesday he was in an all out funk. Gabriel stopped twirling the blade for a few minutes, pressing the end of the handle to his forehead as he thought.

 

Kismet had promised she would give Chuck a chance, but she had been ducking his calls ever since and blatantly ignoring him. The archangel sighed. He was finally getting a chance to spend some quality time with Sam, but instead of being able to enjoy it he felt obligated to run interference between Dad and his girlfriend. Well, maybe girlfriend. Supposed to be girlfriend. Whatever they were. Gabriel sighed. Why did everything involving Dad have to be so complicated?

 

Well, if she wasn’t going to take his calls, Gabriel wasn’t just going to sit around and let Chuck mope. He was rather pitiful and Gabe couldn’t stand his moping periods. Of course, the last time he’d had one of his moping periods, Gabriel had convinced him to make the platypus. The archangel smirked, ready to play things his own way. He wouldn’t go all out this time; no, he would give her a chance by being direct with her.

 

But if she pulled this shit again, she was going to be waking up one morning in a bed of marshmallow fluff.

 

With that, Gabriel plunked his chair back on the ground, startling the two hunters in the room. “I’m off, Sammy boy!” he announced.

 

“Where are you going?” the younger Winchester asked.

 

“Gotta pay a quick visit to someone, won’t be long,” he winked. And with that, he flew off, over Kansas, skating past the edge of Missouri, and across the plains of Iowa before arriving in the city of Minneapolis, where a certain redhead just so happened to work. It took a little bit of recon work to pinpoint her exact location, but once he did he alighted gently in her office.

 

Gently. Ha. What really happened was he swooped in with a whoosh that scattered all of the papers on her desk. He didn’t mean to be intentionally antagonizing, but she _was_ cutting into his quality time with Samsquatch.

 

Kismet’s head whipped up from her computer. “What the-“ she didn’t complete her sentence but shot him a nasty glare as she got up from her desk to pick up the papers. “Seriously, Gabriel?” She sighed heavily as she bent over to scoop up the papers, checking them to match reports and ensure they were in order. She shook her head as she mumbled, “Is this seriously what my life has become? Angels just swooping in out of nowhere on me?”

 

“Well I wouldn’t have to swoop in on you if you weren’t ignoring a certain somebody,” Gabriel replied, rolling his eyes.

 

Kismet groaned. “Seriously? Is he always this clingy?”

 

Gabriel fixed her with a stare. “You agreed to give him a chance.”

 

“I know. But ‘giving him a chance’ doesn’t involve me dropping everything for him. My boss has a very important conference next week that I’m helping him prepare for. I’m _swamped_ with work right now and if I was paid hourly, I’d be getting a buttload of OT for all this shit. I’m not even going to get a proper weekend this time around because I’ll be compiling the final reports to send to Max on Sunday so he can be ready to go on Monday morning.” She rolled her eyes as she added tersely, “The universe doesn’t revolve around _God_ and his feelings.”

 

“Chuck.”

 

“Whatever.”

 

Gabriel frowned, looking around at her office as he considered his next move. Just because she was Chuck’s soulmate didn’t mean she didn’t have a life of her own, and she was valiantly fighting to not have everything she had worked for uprooted. He could respect that. Personal space was a premium for him once upon a time. “Look, I understand,” he started. “My family is … well, dysfunctional, for lack of a better word.”

 

Kismet cocked an eyebrow. “God’s family? Dysfunctional?”

 

“Well, I mean, I did help lock my aunt away for millions of years, got dragged into all kinds of family bullshit between my two older brothers, and when I got tired of it I ran off and became a pagan god.”

 

Her eyebrows scrunched. “Wait, I thought you were an archangel.”

 

“I am.”

 

“And you’re also a pagan god?”

 

“Yep.”

 

She paused for a moment. “Are you cupid?”

 

“Oh no, no, Cupids are a type of angel, actually. Quite loving angels. They’re usually invisible to humans, though.”

 

She nodded slowly, then had a dawning realization. “Fuck, don’t tell me you’re Dionysus.”

 

Gabriel barked in laughter. “Nah, nice fellow, though. Always threw the best parties. No, I became the Norse God of Mischief and Magic.”

 

“ … Loki?”

 

He spread his arms. “In the flesh. That Hiddleston guy doesn’t look a thing like me, I know, but he does such a great job I can’t find a bad thing to say about him.”

 

Kismet shook her head. “This is getting too weird.”

 

“I know, I know. It’s … it’s a lot. I don’t deny that.”

 

She sighed heavily and looked at the archangel, conveying exhaustion. “Then what do you want me to do?”

 

“I’m not asking you to drop everything for him, just to take a few minutes and return a phone call. Just let him know you’re busy, keep him updated. It doesn’t have to be an in-depth report or an hour long conversation.” She rubbed her forehead and Gabriel felt the need to add, “I meant what I said before. I’ll be the first to tell you he isn’t perfect, but he isn’t the boogey man you think he is.”

 

Kismet looked back up at him and asked, “Then what is he, Gabriel?”

 

Gabriel smirked. “He’s just a powerful, multi-dimensional divine being, standing in front of the soulmate he created, asking her to love him.”

 

She narrowed her eyes, not amused. “Really?”

 

The archangel chuckled. “Sorry, I couldn’t resist. I love cheesy movies.”

 

“Well, as much fun as this has been, Chuckles, I really do need to get back to work.”

 

“Chuckles? I thought _I_ was the one giving out nicknames around here.” She got him a glare that made him raise his hands in defeat. “Alright, fine, I’ll leave you alone. But …”

 

Kismet rolled her eyes. “I will call Chuck sometime this weekend.”

 

Gabriel smiled. Mission accomplished. “Good.” And with that, he flew back to the bunker, much more carefully this time so he disturbed the least amount of papers for her. He landed with minimal difficulty in almost the same spot in the bunker as he’d been standing when he left. Sam and Dean were still sitting in the same chairs, even, the only difference was that Chuck had finally come out of his room, wearing a tattered robe and drinking a mug of something that the archangel had a sneaking suspicion was not all coffee.

 

Chuck looked at him, puzzled as he sipped his drink, but he didn’t even have a chance to get a question out as Gabriel announced preemptively, “Good news, Pops!”

 

Chuck may have been a little slow on the uptake, but Sam and Dean weren’t. “Gabriel, what did you do?” Dean asked.

 

“Nothing!” he exclaimed, unsure if he wanted to be hurt or proud at their assumption that he’d been up to something. “I just paid Kismet a visit.”

 

Sam quite literally facepalmed. “And _why_ did you do _that_?”

 

“Because I can’t stand it when Dad mopes. So,” Gabe turned to Chuck, “I checked in on her to see what was going on, she said she’s mondo busy with work this week but she promised she would give you a quick call this weekend. So will you _please_ stop moping around?”

 

Chuck did seem to perk up a little at the thought of getting a call from Kismet, and for that Gabriel gave himself an internal fist pump. “You think she really will?”

 

“I think she really will. You should have _seen_ the state of her office when I landed. Of course, I didn’t make things much better by scattering papers all over the place …”

 

“ _Gabriel_!” Sam was not amused.

 

“Hey, she wouldn’t be a part of the family if she didn’t get a little rib every now and then,” Gabe countered with a wink. Sam rolled his eyes, knowing he was never going to win with the archangel.

 

Gabe turned back to Chuck. “But for reals, does this make you feel a little better?”

 

Chuck grinned and set a hand on Gabriel’s shoulder. “It does. Thank you.”

 

“Great! That means my work is done. Time to relax with my Sammers.”

 

“I have research to do, Gabriel.”

 

“Aww,” Gabriel pouted, trying his best to give Sam the patented puppy eyes that the younger Winchester was so famous for.

 

Sam grinned at him; he was a sucker for Gabriel’s pout. “Just give me ten more minutes.”

 

“Sweet! It’s a date, then,” Gabriel declared as he tipped back in his chair again, popping a peppermint in his mouth as he started twirling his angel blade.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaand we're back with Kizzy for this chapter :)

Late Saturday evening, I sat on my couch, fingering my phone as I wondered if I should go ahead and call Chuck. I had promised Gabriel that I would call him this weekend, but technically Sunday was a part of the weekend, too. I almost wanted to put it off for as long as possible, but something in me also just wanted to get it over with as soon as possible. I was almost finished compiling the reports for Max, I was just waiting on one to go over so I could send it to him to review for Monday morning. That would be the bulk of the work done, I would just need to go in Monday and finalize some reports for his later meetings that week and prepare him, and then I would probably go in Tuesday morning and make sure everything was going smoothly before I took the rest of the week off. Max would be leaving Tuesday evening to go visit our Chicago office, and since he didn’t need me with him, he had suggested I take some time off. Everybody knew he would be leaving and with the conference going on, there wasn’t anything I would be needed for in the office, the bulk of my work is what I was doing right now.

 

Consequently, I found myself with a little bit of free time as I kept refreshing my e-mail, and I pulled up my call history and stared at the number on the screen. _Just a quick call, you don’t have to make it long. You can do this. You promised to do this._ With Gabriel’s appearance, I didn’t really want to tempt what might happen if I didn’t follow through, so I somewhat reluctantly pressed the number and let it dial.

 

It only rang twice before that familiar, soft voice answered. “Hello?”

 

I stamped down the anxiety threatening me before I answered, “Hey, Chuck. It’s … it’s me.”

 

“Kiz?” he asked, and I could hear the smile in his voice as he added, “It’s really good to hear from you. I’m so glad you called.”

 

My heart was fluttering wildly in my chest, though I wasn’t quite sure why. “Yeah, um. Sorry I haven’t called you back. You guys kinda kidnapped me at an inopportune time at work,” I said with a chuckle. “I’ve been really busy preparing my boss for a conference this week.”

 

“It’s alright, don’t worry about it,” he assured. “I actually didn’t know Gabriel was going to visit you, he just … took it upon himself to do that.”

 

_Well that’s interesting_. I had assumed he had sent Gabriel himself to check on me, to goad me into contacting him. But hearing that he had come to me of his own volition … of course, that was if I wanted to believe Chuck, but so far I had no reason not to. After all, Gabriel hadn’t _said_ Chuck had sent him, I had just assumed. And we all knew what happened when people assumed … At that point, my computer dinged with a received e-mail, and I saw that the final report was finally in my hands. “It’s fine, he just startled me. Anyway, I’m sorry but I have a final report to compile for my boss that _finally_ just arrived in my inbox, so I need to go.”

 

“Of course, please, I don’t want to keep you. But before you go, I want to ask you something.”

 

I paused, my hand hovering over the mouse that I was reaching for, ready to get back to work. I bit my lip, wondering what he could possibly want. “What’s that?”

 

“I was wondering if we could get together sometime,” he proposed, quickly adding, “Not in a date-type of situation, just in a … sit down and talk kind of thing. I think there’s a lot that you need to tell me, things you need to get off your chest, and I want to help you.”

 

I inhaled a huge breath, pondering if I really wanted to take him up on this or not. Of course, I needed to … I had promised I would give him a chance. And he was being very low-pressure right now, not even asking for a date or any kind of commitment out the gate. Mentally, I was loathe to do this, but I had to give him props for that. “Um, sure, yeah. I’m actually planning on taking most of the week off, since I’m not needed at work.”

 

“Great! Um, how’s Tuesday or Wednesday for you?”

 

I pondered the options for a moment. I should be out of the office on Tuesday by mid-morning, perhaps I could just go ahead and get it all over with in one fell swoop and then get to stay in for the rest of the week and recoup. I needed some serious R&R after all this shit. I had tried my damnedest to enjoy my last free weekend before the conference, going out to a couple of clubs and letting loose, but the weight of what had happened managed to stick with me. If I was going to have this not-date, I might as well have it as soon as possible. “Tuesday sounds good, I’ll actually be going into the office that morning just to check on things, but I should be out by mid-morning.”

 

“Sounds great. Are there any places you like to go to in the area where we could sit and talk?”

 

“What do you mean? I thought Gabriel would be flying me out to you again.”

 

“Well, he can if you want, but I want you to be comfortable.”

 

Despite the kidnapping, he seemed fairly considerate. Maybe this was a good thing. Of course, I wasn’t sure just how much of my life I wanted to reveal just yet, so I chose a safe location. “Okay, then. Um, I’ll be pretty close to Hennepin Ave, there’s a coffee shop there called Spyhouse. It’s a nice, cozy little spot I visit sometimes, it shouldn’t be too busy by the time I get off.”

 

“I’ll meet you there, then. Say, 11:30?”

 

“Yeah, that should be plenty of time. Do you need the address?”

 

He laughed lightly. “No, I’ll be fine.”

 

“Alright, then. Well … I guess I’ll see you Tuesday.”

 

“See you then,” he replied, and I went to hang up the phone before anything more could be said.

 

I forced myself to take long, deep breaths as I set my phone down, gathering my wits about me before I pulled up the final report to compile it. This was just so ridiculous the way everything was playing out, but it seemed that was the norm for me now. Not like this had always been normal for me, but I had managed to settle into something of a groove in the years since my escape. I had worked hard and busted my butt to get where I was, not exactly in the lap of luxury but still rather comfortably off. I was doing well for myself, and it had been a long time since I’d been scared that it would all come crashing down around me.

 

Now, that fear started creeping back into me as I read and highlighted the information my boss would need, incorporating it all into one document that I attached and sent to Max. Finally done, I rubbed my eyes and stood to pour myself a glass of well-deserved wine. As I sipped, I regarded the contents of my fridge before saying _fuck it_ and ordering delivery.

 

After mulling over my options, I went with The King’s Thai Cuisine, as they were pretty consistently good for me, had good vegetarian options, and most importantly they were still open at this hour. I put in an order of egg rolls, stir fry, and pad tai and settled down with my glass of wine while I waited … which wasn’t long, considering they were right down the street. I managed to polish off that glass and get halfway through another before my food arrived, and I left a generous tip for putting in an order so late.

 

I refreshed my wine and dug in, shoving the not-date as far back in my mind as I could. That night, I didn’t need a sleeping pill at all as the evening wine helped lull me to sleep.

 

Sunday I spent mostly on the couch, watching random HGTV shows as I tried to relax as much as possible, the not-date still looming and ever-present in my mind. I was really glad I’d agreed to do this on Tuesday, as I knew if I had stretched it out even further it would make things even worse. Already it felt like time was stretching on and on, and not in the pleasant way, in the way that something you dreaded was coming up and you wanted to hurry up and do it but time just wouldn’t cooperate and get you there fast enough.

 

Monday was, thankfully, a whirlwind of activity, and I barely got any chance to focus on what was coming up at all. I was calling and chasing down people for final reports to compile, compiling information, and confirming flight and hotel information for Max so he could leave the next day. I also remembered to call Max’s husband, to give him the hotel info just in case Max forgot. He could be a bit forgetful sometimes, but thankfully that’s what I was for. Jeffrey appreciated it, and told me he would have Max bring in some of his delicious lemon poppyseed muffins for me the next morning as thanks for all my help.

 

It really paid to get in good with the spouse.

 

Tuesday morning was the polar opposite of the previous day. Whereas Monday had been nothing but a flurry of activity from start to finish, Tuesday was calm and breezy. The muffins Jeffrey had promised were moist and delicious, and went well with the K-cup coffee Max kept stocked in his office. We finished so early that Max and I just ended up chatting until he figured he needed to get on. He wanted to finish packing before he picked up the twins from kindergarten. Max and Jeffrey had adopted twin girls from Korea a couple of years ago, and they had fit well into their family, accompanying their son, whom they’d had via a surrogate. Their son, Falcon, was in the second grade, and went to school all day. But the girls only had half-day kindergarten, and Max and Jeff usually traded off who picked them up, as long as their work schedules didn’t interfere. Since he was leaving, Max volunteered to pick them up today, to give him a little extra time with them before his trip. It was sweet to watch them all as a family, they fit together so well it was like they were meant to be.

 

As Max left the office, I wondered briefly if I would ever have a family like that. For the longest time, since my dating prospects hadn’t panned out, I’d more or less given up hope that I could have anything fulfilling like that. With this new development, though … I didn’t know how I felt about that. I mean, I had never wanted kids of my own, though I wasn’t opposed to adopting older kids or getting with someone who already had kids of their own. This, though … this was so much more. It was weird. It was complicated. And I’d barely had the time to sort out my own feelings on it.

 

_Maybe Chuck could help,_ I thought, before I internally rolled my eyes at myself. _Is it really that easy to slip back into that mentality of asking God for help?_ I would be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed in myself. I’d worked hard to cast off the chains of brainwashing that had held me so firmly in the cult. It had truly taken years before I was comfortable with myself again, and when I had settled into myself it seemed that everything else fell into place, seemingly to signify that I was on the right path. Destiny, or fate, or whatever, it seemed, had other plans. And I wasn’t really too happy with it. Maybe, though, maybe I could disconnect from him somehow. Maybe I could just stay here and keep forging my own path, though towards what I didn’t know. Wasn’t that pretty typical, though? That people didn’t really know where they were going most of the time, they just knew they had to get there?

 

My thoughts swirled around me as I locked up the office for the last time that week, making my way down to the parking garage to fetch my car so I could meet up with Chuck. I felt incredibly conflicted about this whole thing, but part of me did want to give this a chance, if only so if it all came crashing down, I could honestly say I tried. Of course, whether I wanted it to crash and burn or not … I couldn’t even say. Even as I pulled up outside the coffee shop, I wondered if I should just keep going and ignore his calls. _No, no. You promised,_ I reminded myself as I shut off the engine and got out of the car, checking the time on my phone. _11:23. Plenty of time._

 

As I stepped toward the coffee shop, inhaling the wonderful aroma of brewing coffee that lingered in the sidewalk area, I breathed it in and relaxed. This would certainly be a turning point, I felt. Which way this would go after this, I couldn’t say yet, but I knew that once I entered this coffee shop, my life would never be the same.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, I had started writing this to go with the last chapter, but it was getting too long so I had decided to leave the non-date for this chapter. It ended up on the long side, but I'm sure y'all won't mind, right?

My nerves flared as I entered the coffee shop, and while I wasn’t very hungry or thirsty, I ordered up a cappuccino and waited patiently for it to be made. The shop wasn’t very busy, only a few customers coming in here and there and fewer still lingering. _Perfect_.

 

As I collected my cup, I added a little bit of sugar and went to claim a seat at a table in the back, to give us some privacy. I checked my phone again to see the time. _11:28_. I took a sip of the hot beverage, hoping it would help calm me at least a little bit, and the smooth blend was nice and soothing. Under ordinary circumstances, it would have calmed me right down and soothed my soul, but it was hard to do that when you knew you were about to meet up with _God_. The wait was more than a little unsettling, and I tapped my short fingernails against the table and tapped my heel against the floor as I wondered how much time had passed. I checked my phone again. _11:29_. _Fuck, why is this taking so long?_ I tucked a strand of hair that had fallen out of my loose bun behind my ear and adjusted my stripped button up. I was wearing the button up underneath a black sweater that I paired with a matching pair of black slacks, and I was wondering if the layers was such a wise choice when I realized I was suddenly warm. I pondered taking the sweater off for a moment, when all of a sudden I saw Chuck walk in the door and that idea went right out the window.

 

He waved to me and ordered a simple coffee at the counter, that they quickly poured and handed off to him as he dropped enough cash to cover it before making his way over to me. There was a certain lightness in his step that seemed almost giddy, and he looked like he was trying to refrain from smiling too widely, though he couldn’t stop the small grin that had spread across his face as soon as he walked into the shop. “Thank you, for meeting me here,” he said as he went to take a sip of the coffee. “Oh, this is some nice stuff.”

 

I couldn’t help the small grin. “Yeah, I come here quite a bit.”

 

We lapsed into silence for a moment as we sipped on our drinks, and I shifted in the seat, unsure what to say or how to go from there. I mean, it was going to be awfully awkward if we both just sat there and drank our coffee, but I was completely blanking on any kind of conversation. Fortunately, it seemed he had prepared for that as once he took a few sips, he said, “So, I’m pretty sure you’ve ascertained that I hadn’t meant for you to be born or anything to happen to you just yet. And, I mean, aside from the public records that Sam and Dean were able to pull to locate you with, I don’t really know that much about you or what happened to you.”

 

“Ah. So, you want the scoop.”

 

He smiled gently. “If you wouldn’t mind. You don’t have to go super detailed or anything, just whatever you’re comfortable sharing, if anything. I just …” he looked away for a moment, his smile disappearing, “… I just want to know what happened. What went so wrong.”

 

_Well, I suppose I can indulge him._ I took a sip of my drink and cleared my throat a little, just wondering where to even start. “Well … I was born in Russell, Kansas. Um, I’m the third oldest in my family.” My fingers played along the handle of my mug as I figured out how to proceed. “By the time my older sister - the second oldest - was born, they were well-entrenched into the cult.” I pursed my lips as I thought about Abigail, the first time I’d thought about her in years. She had been married off at 18 and by the time I left four years later, she had two kids of her own and another on the way. My parents had been pressuring me to get married since the day I turned 18, myself, and the reason I’d finally gotten the gumption to run away is the man they were forcing me to marry. Sure, it was supposed to be _my choice_ who I married, but I had been wasting prime fertile time in my late teens and early twenties according to them, so they saw fit to _intervene_. That intervention lead me to me running off in the middle of the night, one of the most difficult nights of my life, but ultimately the best decision I’d ever made. “My parents, they … they did their best to shelter us from the outside world. They told us it was sinful and that if we ever left then we would be damned to hell. They always presented things to us as choices … things like, staying home vs going to college, getting an outside job or being employed in a trade by someone in the cult, even whether or not they wanted kids, or how many they wanted vs letting _God_ decide. But it was always very clear that there was only one right answer, and that there was no real choice, at least to me it was.” Tears pricked my eyes and I took a deep breath in order, trying to fight them off. “And I tried, I really did try to live the lifestyle. I tried for _years_ but it never felt right. And the more it didn’t feel right the more I tried to throw myself into it, but I just ended up hurting myself.” Despite my best efforts, an errant tear ran down my face quicker than I could wipe it away. I had been studiously looking at my drink, the table, the wall, anything but Chuck’s face because the vibe I was getting from him was almost _painful_ in its intensity.

 

Suddenly, I felt soft skin brush my own, and I looked down to see that Chuck’s hand had reached across the table to envelop mine. My immediate instinct was to pull it away, and my wrist did twitch, but I didn’t pull away. I wasn’t even sure why. “I’m sorry,” he murmured. “I’m so sorry you were ever put in that situation. I’m glad you got out of it but at the same time … I wish you would have never had to go through it. I wish I could have taken my time like I had planned, time to choose your parents and then guide your soul to them. The childhood and adolescence I had wanted for you …” this time, it was his turn to let slip a tear, “…I had wanted so much more, so much _better_. And it was stolen from me. But more importantly it was stolen from you, and I hope you believe me when I tell you that I am eternally sorry.” He squeezed my hand as he added, “I never wanted any of this for you. I wanted you to grow up, to learn, to have experiences. I wanted to meet you face to face for the first time in some exotic locale where we would meet and our bond would immediately click for both of us.” He shook his head as his thumb errantly stroked my hand. “If only I could go back, change things, I would. I would never leave heaven, I would guard your soul myself if only to ensure you stay safe.” His lips crooked up in a small, sad smile. “Unfortunately, even the Almighty has his limits.”

 

I nodded as I quickly blinked back tears, a turmoil of emotions thrashing inside of me. This was so strange, sitting here and talking with him so casually. Before, I’d lost faith that he even existed, and that if he did he was cruel and capricious and no one I wanted to pray or profess love to or worship. And yet, here he sat before me, softly stroking my hand as we both let stray tears slip down our cheeks. He seemed so … _vulnerable_. Almost like I wasn’t sure if him taking my hand was for my comfort or his. But I felt he was still missing the bigger picture. “I wasn’t the only one,” I said, feeling the need to speak up for my peers, the ones who were too scared to leave. “There were lots of us, girls and boys alike, who were beaten down until we were broken, paired off into marriages hardly anybody wanted, encouraged to have as many children as possible to help perpetuate the cycle of abuse. I mean, it’s … it’s nice and all that you’re sorry it happened to _me_ , but … there were so many of us. And only a few who were brave enough to leave. Whole lives are systematically _destroyed_ , and all for your supposed glory.”

 

He nodded again. “I tried, I really did, when I came down as Jesus. I mean … I don’t know how much clearer I could have been. I saw them trying to pervert the simple message I tried to put out and in the beginning I tried to rectify it, but it was just _pervasive_.” He went silent for a moment before he added softly, “I suppose after hundreds and hundreds of years, I just got fed up and let it go.” He flicked his eyes to me as he said, “If only I could have done things differently. If only I could have made a stronger stance. I have so many regrets, but this is probably one of the biggest. This … what they did … it was wrong in every sense of the word and I wish I could go back and set everything right before it got to that point.”

 

I wiped away the tears that had spilled over, my cappuccino long forgotten, along with his coffee. Hearing this, while obviously unexpected, was completely vindicating. Knowing that I was right all along, and that my decision to leave didn’t damn me to hell because _that’s what God would have wanted all along_. The only thing that would have made it better is if my parents and the elders heard it, too, not just to prove them wrong - though I would be lying if I said I wouldn’t have derived a certain pleasure from it - but just so they could stop the cycle before anymore lives were broken and destroyed. A few moments of silence passed between us, but in that silence, something passed between us that needed no words. It was an understanding. We had reached a point where we could possibly … reconcile? Was that the right word? And, again, was that something I even wanted? I still didn’t have an answer for that, but now I felt the more turbulent emotions were settling down and I could actually give it some thought and consideration.

 

After the moment between us passed, Chuck cleared his throat and asked, “What prompted you to leave, finally?”

 

I chuckled as I replied, “Well it was more of a circumstance of my hand being forced. If they hadn’t … perhaps I wouldn’t have left. I don’t know.” I shook my head as I tucked my hair behind my ear again. “My parents were pressuring me to get married right when I turned 18. In fact, it was the day of my birthday that my dad came to me with a request from a guy I barely knew to court. I just never felt right saying yes to anyone who asked to court me, and I kept putting them off and putting them off until I was almost 21. At that point … I don’t know, I guess they thought I was wasting valuable time that I could be spending popping out babies and they forced a courtship on me. I didn’t even know him and I tried to give him a chance at first, but he was … he was a real jerk. When he managed to get some private time with me - which was quite the feat, as we were supposed to have chaperones at all times - he started grabbing me and trying to force himself on me. I freaked out and ran to tell my dad but even that wouldn’t make him call off the courtship.” My lips quirked up in a rueful smile as I said, “Hell, he chewed _me_ out because he said _I_ tempted _him_. As if my baggy sweater and long skirt somehow showed a centimeter more flesh somewhere and set him off. So, I had a choice: get married to a jerk and be forced to have his children … or run.” I shrugged as I tried valiantly to suppress the damn lip quiver that would lead to outright sobs as I remembered that night, the fear and the desperation that had pushed me far out of my comfort zone. “The way I saw it, I didn’t have any other option. So that night, after everyone else went to sleep, I packed a bag with what I could, grabbed what money I could find, snuck out of the house, and ran like hell. I ran until I got to a truck stop, and out of all the people I could have run into, out of all the creeps and pervs who could have taken advantage of me, I actually found a really nice guy that was going to Minneapolis that was willing to give me a ride.”

 

“And you just ran off to a random city?”

 

“Well, not _completely_ random. I did know of a couple of people who had escaped before me, and I knew that one was in the Twin Cities. As soon as I got in town, I looked them up and begged them to help me, and they did. They took me in, helped me get my GED, since my parent’s homeschooling wasn’t exactly up to snuff. Even put in a recommendation for me to Target Corporate and I got a job there, and … well, I started rebuilding.”

 

Chuck was silent for a moment, absorbing the information, chewing his lip. He smiled softly as he said, “You’re so strong. Resilient.”

 

A blushed edged its way into my cheeks as I replied, “No, not really. I mean, if I was, I would have stood up for myself. I would have run a lot sooner. I would have done _something_ other than sneak out in the middle of the night on the eve of my engagement party.” I wasn’t without regrets, thinking of the friends I’d had. I blinked away more tears as I rambled, “I had friends, a couple of girls I was close with. They were younger than I was and I’d become friends with them because we were all still single and all of my other friends had gotten married and moved on to focusing on family and babies. I had left them with no warning, and by the time I’d been able to reach out to them, they rejected me. If I only could have told them before I left, if I could have talked to them and explained, maybe they would have understood. Hell, maybe they would have come with me. I could have saved other people, but I was so selfish I’d only thought of myself.” I dropped my head, unable to fight the tears anymore as they fell freely. I wished I wasn’t wearing my hair in a bun so I had some sort of shield against the world but I could do nothing but openly weep at the burden of guilt I’d carried for so long.

 

“Hey,” I heard Chuck murmur as I felt his fingers gently cup my chin and lift my head so I would look at him. “It’s not your fault. Maybe they would have listened and gone with you, or maybe they would have still rejected you outright. You don’t know what might have happened, and it’s no good to dwell on that.” I felt his thumb reach over to stroke my chin as he said, “I’m sorry you were put in a position of having to choose between yourself and others, but you made the right decision, and whether it played out how you wanted or not, the important thing is you did it. Don’t ever doubt that.”

 

I nodded and reached up to wipe the tears away, glad that I hadn’t put on makeup this morning or else I’d have black streaks to contend with. My friends’ loss still haunted me, but I did indeed feel a little bit better. “To be honest, I’ve never really talked about this. With anyone. Even the girl I hooked up with once I got here, I never told her _why_ I left. And she didn’t ask. I guess she just assumed I’d gotten fed up, like she did.”

 

Chuck smirked. “So that’s why you slapped me so hard. You just let it build up.”

 

“Yeah, I guess,” I said with a chuckle. “I was really mad at you, though. For a long, long time. At first I thought you’d been ignoring my prayers, and then I thought you just didn’t exist.”

 

He winced. “Well, since I took a vessel and came down to Earth, I couldn’t actively hear prayers. It was like a … like a switch that I turned off. It was my choice to leave it off for so long, and if I’d had it on, I would have known about your birth a lot sooner and I could have intervened, could have taken you away and avoid all the heartbreak for you.” He chuckled softly as he said, “I feel like I keep repeating myself, but at the same time, I don’t feel like I’m saying it enough. I’m sorry. Really, truly sorry. And I’ll do anything to make it up you, to fix this, _anything_.”

 

“Anything?”

 

“Anything.”

 

I pursed my lips, thinking. I had felt selfish for leaving before, but now was my chance to make up for it. “Then reveal yourself to them. Tell them they’re wrong, tell the elders they’re nothing more than false prophets misleading the sheep. Set the children free. Set them _all_ free. And tell my father … tell him I was right.”

 

Chuck paused, and for a moment I thought I’d overstepped, that I’d asked too much of him. “Is this what you really want?”

 

“Yes,” I replied earnestly, almost wanting to hold my breath in suspense of if he would grant me this request or not.

 

He smirked. “Most people, when asked by the God of the known universe, what they want - when I’m able to give them almost anything - ask for something like … like money, houses, land, material possessions.” His smile grew. “But you ask me to intervene for others’ sake.”

 

“Does … does that mean you’ll do it?”

 

He nodded. “I will.”

 

Tears of relief seeped out of my eyes as I said, almost in a whisper, “Thank you.”

 

“Of course.”

 

My cappuccino was cold, but it was still good, so I finished it and Chuck finished his coffee and then we stood to part ways, though he walked me out of the coffee shop. I still felt confused and conflicted and I wasn’t sure if I really wanted to go ahead with a romantic kind of relationship, but I didn’t feel like raging out or crying when I thought of Chuck, so I counted that as an improvement.

 

“Can I see you again?” he asked as we stepped outside.

 

I chewed on my lip for a moment as I considered. This whole meeting, while very emotional, wasn’t bad. If anything, I felt a sense of relief as all of the emotions that I’d been bottling up for so long had been let go and sorted. I felt like I still had a way to go, but I felt open to it. “Sure, yeah.”

 

He didn’t even try to hide the wide grin that broke out across his face. “Wonderful! Thank you. Can I call you tomorrow?”

 

“Yeah, just not too early, I’ll be sleeping in.”

 

“Of course, of course.” He stood there awkwardly for a moment, his hands in his pockets. I could have sworn there was something else he wanted to say or do, but all he did was say, “Well, I’ll see you later, then. Bye.”

 

And with that he was gone, just disappeared into thin air right in front of me. I jumped a little, surprised, but then shook my head as I figured he probably could get around similar to angels. As I walked back to my car, I fished my keys out of my purse and wondered if he would keep his word. After all, anyone could say that they would do anything, they could agree and promise to anything, but actually following through … that was something else entirely. When I sat down in the driver’s seat, I closed and locked my door and sighed, feeling … well, I wasn’t entirely sure what I was feeling. I didn’t feel that same anxiety that I’d felt previously at the prospect of talking or even meeting with him. Instead, I felt … calm? At peace? Was that what that feeling was? But there was still a hint of caution in the background, a part of me that wanted to hold back and wait, to hold my breath until I could see if the situation was really on the up and up.

 

As I put the key into the ignition and turned the key, I decided that if he did do what I asked, that action would prove his intention to me as well as his trustworthiness. And if he did that, then I would exercise some quid pro quo.

 

I would go out on a date with him.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know, third update in about as many days. I wouldn't expect this, but this part of the story has just had me absolutely hooked and refused to let me go. Because of my own experiences growing up in a cult, this is a very personal chapter for me, and it was really cathartic to write.
> 
> So, here's Chuck confronting the cult. Hope you enjoy.

Chuck arrived at the bunker a split second after he left the Minneapolis street, his way of traveling even quicker and more efficient than angel flight. But, that was the perk of being God and all. As he appeared, he saw Sam and Dean sitting at the table, along with the angels Gabriel and Castiel, apparently awaiting his return.

 

Gabriel stood and immediately asked, “So? How did it go?”

 

“It went well,” he replied, feeling much _lighter_ than he had before.

 

Sam’s eyebrows lifted in surprise. “Really?”

 

Chuck couldn’t stop the grin from spreading across his face. “Yeah, really.”

 

“Well what happened?” Dean asked.

 

Chuck shrugged. “Nothing much, really. We just had coffee, and talked. Well, she mostly talked, I mostly listened, which is what I thought was important.” Chuck reached up and scratched behind his neck, his smile disappearing as he remembered everything she had told him. “I really messed up, guys. The shit she went through …” he looked away, “…I shouldn’t have left heaven in the first place. It was a stupid risk and she ended up paying for it.” He let his arm fall as silence fell over the group. The others weren’t sure what to say next, but Chuck knew. And, furthermore, he knew what needed to be done. “I’m going to do what I can to make it right, though.” He looked up and fixed Sam with a no-nonsense look. “Sam, can you track down some people for me?”

 

“Uh, yeah, sure.”

 

“Kismet’s parents, could you find them for me? They should be in Russell, Kansas.”

 

“Shouldn’t be a problem,” the taller Winchester replied as he stood. “Let me grab my laptop.”

 

“You, uh, aren’t planning on _smiting_ them, are you?” Dean asked as Sam disappeared.

 

Chuck couldn’t help the laugh that escaped him. “No, no smiting. Just confrontation.”

 

“Confrontation?” Cas questioned, narrowing his eyes and tilting his head as he tried to understand.

 

The smile was back on Chuck’s face. “This is how I truly know that I made her right.” Sam arrived back in the room with his open laptop in hand, but Chuck continued, undeterred. “I had told her that I was willing to do anything to make this up to her, emphasis on the anything. Most people would probably go for some material possessions or a position of power … she simply asked me to confront the cult she was raised in, to rebuke the elders and set the people free.”

 

“Wow,” Dean said as he paused in thought, the beer bottle halfway between the table and his lips. He then lifted the bottle and, before taking a drink, said, “Well, props to her.”

 

Sam was busy tapping away at his computer, only looking up briefly to ask, “So, how are you planning on confronting them?”

 

“Still thinking on that, but I will definitely need to establish who I am early on so they’ll listen to me.”

 

“If I may put forth a suggestion …” Castiel began, “…a display of power seems to be an effective indicator.”

 

Gabriel smirked at the other angel from across the table. “Personal experience, Castiel?”

 

“Perhaps …” but that was all the angel would say.

 

It was only a few minutes before Sam was pushing the laptop to the side so Chuck could see the results of his search. The screen displayed two driver’s licenses, for a certain Kenneth and Patricia Montgomery. Chuck’s eyes narrowed as he took in the couple, knowing that they were the ones who had helped inflict so much pain on his Kismet. The woman looked older than her age, her face lined and her hair almost completely grey. Having child after child after child would probably do that. The man’s salt and pepper hair was clearly thinning, and he had a mustache that looked like it went out of style in the 80’s. He committed their faces to memory before he glanced at their address. They were still in Russell, Kansas, and Chuck wondered if they still lived in the same house that Kismet grew up in or if they had downsized in the years following, since they had likely married off a good number - if not all - of their children.

 

Chuck straightened and said, “Thank you, Sam, that’s all I needed to know.” And in a split-second, he had disappeared yet again.

 

When Chuck reappeared, he was standing on a dirt road at the edge of the Montgomery’s property. They owned a little land in the outskirts of Russell, and as he stared at the large house in the distance, he mused on how he was going to go about this. He had initially thought to just walk up, ring the doorbell, and introduce himself to her parents first, but Castiel had said something about a display of power … _Hmmm_. Well, he was nothing if not creative, so he closed his eyes as he reached out and touched their minds, delving inside. It was painless and went unnoticed to them, it was simply an information search for himself. He could do this to any human he wished, even Kismet, but he had refrained doing it to her because he wanted her to feel like she could trust him, and invading her privacy was a sure-fire way to have her lose any kind of rapport he’d worked so hard to build with her. No, it was a risk he couldn’t take.

 

With a smirk, he opened his eyes and withdrew from their minds. He had what he needed, and he knew exactly what he was going to do next. With a snap, he disappeared from the side of the road.

 

As he reappeared, near the pulpit area of the church where the cult met, he allowed everyone to get their bearings first. Oh no, he wasn’t alone. The congregation was filled with every single member of the cult, members that he had personally transported there. It was a bit jarring for them to suddenly appear in their church from wherever they had been, but he had made sure that nobody would get hurt, member or not, from their transportation. When they all got oriented, he stepped forward. “Hello.” At the sound of his voice, they quieted, looking at the strange man standing at the pulpit. “I would say I’m glad you’ve all come, but I’m the one who brought you here.”

 

“And who are you?” an older man asked, standing up. It wasn’t Kenneth Montgomery, but a cursory mind sweep revealed it was the head elder. Logical that he would speak up, and Chuck was glad that he did.

 

“I just wanted to call a little meeting here to discuss what all you’re doing. I mean, I think I am entitled, seeing as I am your God.”

 

“Blasphemy!” the elder declared.

 

Chuck laughed. “Yes, because a normal human being can summon you from wherever you were and bring you here.” He leveled his gaze at the man. “Don’t insult me, I didn’t make you that stupid and I know it.”

 

That shut him up as he simply sat down, the logic irrefutable. Of course, an archangel _could_ technically do the same, but they didn’t know that. These people had no concept of the supernatural, seeing evil and demons everywhere, when if they were to actually encounter a _real_ demon … well, they would have been found wanting, that was for sure.

 

Chuck stared him down for a moment longer before he turned to the rest of them. “I wanted to talk to you all because your activities have been brought to my attention, and I have to say … I am really, really disappointed in all of you.” He let the statement sink in for a moment before he continued, pacing a little, “You know, I made this so simple, so simple! Love me and love your neighbors. Care for your fellow humans. Be selfless. Don’t judge. Live and let live. I have to wonder what was so difficult about that message to understand?” He paused a moment and looked out over the crowd, seeing some of them bow their heads during the admonition, others fixated on him as they drank in what he was saying. “I said nothing about marrying young, about forcing young adults who are practically _children_ into marriage, absolutely nothing about having as many kids as you can. You wanna know the truth? I don’t care how many kids you have. Have one, have a dozen, have none, I don’t care! I don’t even monitor your fertility cycles and make sure you get impregnated, I _created_ your body’s systems to do that on its own. Every child you have … it’s not a gift from me, it’s simply a product of biology.”

 

He paused and licked his lips, his vessel’s mouth getting dry, partly from talking and partly from the real rage that was starting to build in him. Sure, he’d been hands off for countless centuries now, but to see and confront the very thing that was eating away at his core of believers, who was corrupting and abusing _his_ flock. And on top of it all to know that this very sect tried to beat down and break his own soulmate … he was quickly becoming furious. “And can you _please stop_ with the false humility? The assumption that because you dress ‘modestly’ - which, by the way, I don’t care if you run around _naked_ , I created you that way after all - and because you’re having kid after kid after kid with no regard as to how you’re even going to support them all, that that somehow means that you’ll be granted access to heaven and everyone else is doomed to hell? Letting your children go hungry just so you can have more of them and have faith in me to provide for you doesn’t make you a good person. It makes you the opposite of a good person. It makes you a _monster_. Pro tip, I created you as independent beings so that you could take care of yourselves without my intervention. I don’t provide _shit_ for you, other than your souls. I haven’t been active as God for _years_ , and you haven’t even noticed, have you? Oh yeah, I’ve been hands off for _centuries_ now, fed up with the bullshit. All those prayers you think I answered or those things you think I provided … just happy coincidences! Sheer luck! The only reason I’m coming out of the woodwork now …” he moved his gaze to fixate on the familiar faces of Kenneth and Patricia Montgomery, “… is to fulfill a promise I made.” The Montgomerys felt his gaze on them and glanced up, their eyes locked in his gaze. “You remember your daughter? Kismet? I created her special. I created her for _me_ , to be _my_ soulmate, because yes even God gets lonely. And what did you do to her? Spiritually and emotionally abuse her for _years_? Try to break her spirit? Try to forcefully marry her off to a guy who didn’t even care about her, who wanted her only for her body that I sculpted _for myself_?” He had to hold himself back a little bit, now, as he was starting to shake and he felt his face grow hot and red. “You are some of the _worst_ human beings in creation. You’re the kind of people that make me regret creating humanity. You hurt and pushed away the one soul whom I’d created as my own equal, the one person I created whom I truly cared about. _And you were wrong. You were all wrong_.”

 

Chuck took a deep breath as he reigned himself back in. He hadn’t initially noticed, but the church itself had been shaking slightly with his rage, even the sky darkening outside. As he calmed himself down, the church stopped creaking and the sun started shining again. A few people even looked up at the silence, wondering what he was going to say next or what he was going to do. “To be fully honest with you, if Kismet had asked me to smite you for everything you did to her, I would do it in an instant. No hesitation at all. And truly, it’s what you deserve.” The next line of thought brought a smile, unbidden, to his face. “But my soulmate, the one whom I love, she is truly my greatest work. When I asked her what she wanted, out of anything in all of creation, she asked me only that I would confront you. That I would tear down your false beliefs, that I would remove the elders who are nothing more than false prophets parading around in their precious titles, pretending to be holy men while they take advantage of others. She asked me … to set you all free. And so I shall.” He snapped, but the effect of what he did went unnoticed until he said, “As of this moment, I recognize none of your marriages. They are null and void in my eyes and according to the court systems you are all divorced.” A harsh murmur went throughout the crowd, but he continued, undeterred. “I am giving you a second chance at making a life for yourselves, whatever that life may be. Maybe you want to go to college, learn a trade, enter a career different from the one you occupy. Take your time, think it over. Discover yourselves. _Explore this world_ , I made it _for you_ , damnit! Sure, there’s evil and darkness out there but there is also good and happiness and joy to be found if you only look for it. You may not remarry, not for five years, and at the end of that five years if you still love your spouse, if the path you are on is still one you want to walk, then you may do so with my full blessing. _But_ , you _will not_ force anyone to walk a path they do not want, to do anything they do not wish to do. You will not hinder anyone in their exploration of this world, no matter what it is, no matter if you disagree with it or dislike it. And if at the end of that five years, you do not want to be joined with your spouse, and you want to do something different with your life, then you may do so, also with my full blessing. If you have children, then you will share custody and co-parent, but you will not use your co-parenting opportunity to tear down your former spouse or turn your children against them. If you do … then you _will_ face my wrath.

 

He smirked as he observed the hushed congregation, rather pleased with how everything had turned out. “Now, go! Go forth and explore! Don’t insulate yourselves any longer! Women, wear pants! Wear clothes that hug your body and show off your figure, if you want to. I created it to be beautiful, and if you want to show it off, then do so! Everybody, _experiment_! And for my sake, _listen to music_ , just about anything you can get your hands on. I can’t express to you how much _I love music_ , it is one of the best things that has come about from your creation, _do not suppress your love of music and dance_. Live! Truly live. And be free.”

 

With that, he snapped his fingers once more and returned everyone to where he’d found them, emptying the congregation. The people could sort out their leadership themselves, he had given them plenty to think about. He would check in on them, make sure they were doing what he commanded of them. But for now, all that mattered to him was that he kept his promise to Kismet, and he only hoped that she would approve. He chuckled to himself as he thought of the Facebook live video that one of the members had been streaming of him, thinking they were subtle and covert when they were anything but. If anything, though, it helped his message get out, and he hoped it would also serve as some sort of assurance to Kismet that he had indeed kept his promises.

 

He couldn’t wait to call her on Wednesday.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Little bit of a filler chapter, sorry. I was trying to fit in everything that I wanted and it just wasn't working and I was getting frustrated, so the date itself will comprise the next chapter. Sorry! But hopefully this will mean the little writer's block will lift and the story will start flowing from me again. :)

I almost half-expected to be woken up with a phone call Wednesday morning, but I was not. Instead, I woke up naturally, yawning and stretching under the sheets and dozing off and on for a little bit until I finally dragged myself out of bed. After the hustle and bustle of the week before, it was really nice to have this time off. This was one of the things that I really liked about my job, that even when things did get stressful and hectic, there was always time afterwards to unwind and relax. I was incredibly lucky to have a job like that, and I did my best not to take it for granted and take advantage of my employers. But, hey, what was the use of vacation time if I didn’t take it? I wasn’t really motivated to travel, even though the idea of it had appealed to me. Every time I’d think about it, though, I’d think of all the logistics of it … the airfare I’d have to book, the hotel stay I’d have to set up, all the restaurants I’d have to research and plan out my visit, if the place didn’t speak English then figuring out navigating around that … when I thought of what I’d have to deal with, it just didn’t even sound relaxing anymore, it sounded like more work, just a different kind of work, and I wasn’t interested in that. I could relax and recoup at home just fine, I didn’t need a sandy beach.

 

After I went to the bathroom and started up some coffee, I took a moment to check my phone, and I was surprised to find a text from Holly, the woman from the cult that I’d met up with in the Twin Cities after I’d run. We weren’t particularly close friends, but we kept in touch. Had we not been in the same cult, we likely would be barely acquaintances, but our common bond kept us loosely tied together. Not that I didn’t like her or anything, we were just different people, and so we’d usually drift for a while with no real communication other than likes on pictures or random social media comments. It was casual and comfortable and we were fine with that.

 

Her text seemed rather urgent, though. All she said was simply, _Call me._ She never really did social calls much, so whatever it was, it must have been important. I pulled up her number in my contact list and hit call, wondering just what news was waiting for me on the other end of the line.

 

Her phone rang twice, then, “Hello?”

 

“Hey, Holly, it’s Kiz.”

 

“Hey you. Have you been on facebook lately?”

 

“Uh, I guess that depends on what ‘lately’ means.”

 

“Since yesterday.”

 

“No, I don’t think so. After I got home I got sucked into a Fixer Upper marathon and just kind of zoned. I didn’t even watch the news like I normally do. Why, what’s going on?”

 

“You’ll never believe this, Kiz. There’s this video on facebook and I don’t really know what to make of it. It’s this guy talking to our old church, telling them they were wrong, telling them to be free or some shit. It’s really weird, I don’t know. I was hoping you’d seen it.”

 

That sounded … almost familiar. Eerily similar to what I’d requested Chuck do, and the thought that he might have gone and done exactly what I asked made my stomach flutter. Or maybe that was the lack of breakfast. Either way, I suddenly had a mighty need to get on facebook. I sat down on my couch and opened up my laptop, logging in so I could try to find what she was talking about. “No, I hadn’t seen anything like that. Where would it be?”

 

“Oh, it’s _everywhere_. Seriously, people have been sharing the hell out of this, even people outside the cult. It’s so weird! The weirdest part, though … is he talks about you.”

 

“Me?” I asked, pausing as I waited for facebook to load.

 

“Yeah. Like, how you’re his soulmate and how he’s doing this for you and … I don’t know. I mean, the video alone is debatable, but I’ve been in contact with a couple of people on the inside, and from what they’re saying, they totally believe this is real. Like, honest to god _God_ , and it’s having a _huge_ affect already. The elders have been kicked out, even!”

 

The page had loaded and sure enough, it was one of the trending topics on the side bar. It looked like the video was part of a facebook live feed from one of the members, and it looked like it had been started after Chuck had already been speaking to them. I wasn’t sure how much had been missed, but it started with him saying how disappointed he was and went from there. “I’m watching it right now, gimme a sec,” I told Holly, entranced by Chuck on the screen. Everything he said, it was everything I had ever wanted to say, and I swore tears stung my eyes as he singled out my parents in particular while still keeping it about the cult as a whole. When he set them all free - literally, legally free - I gasped. Not that I didn’t think that was within the realm of his powers, but because I had no idea he would have even done anything like that. I felt like cheering, though, like jumping up and whooping and crying tears of pure happiness and elation. This … this felt like a completion. The cycle had been broken.

 

I realized Holly had continued talking, but I hadn’t heard a word of it until she kept repeating my name. “Kiz? Kiz, are you there? Hello …”

 

“It’s real.”

 

“What?”

 

“It’s real. What he’s saying, who he is. It’s true.”

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“I’ve met him. And, I admit, I didn’t believe him at first, either, but he proved himself to me then. And he’s proving himself to me now.”

 

“What? Kiz, have you gone off the deep end? Please tell me you’re not in another cult.”

 

I chuckled. “No, I’m not. He healed my eyesight! I can see without glasses now, even better than when I used to wear them.”

 

“Okay, so … what does this mean?”

 

I sat back on the couch, still a bit gobsmacked by the video. He had said he would do that, sure, but I didn’t know if he actually would. It seemed like he didn’t waste much time doing it, either, as I checked the timestamp on the video. _1:32pm_. Damn. Yeah, he must have gone pretty soon after our coffee thing. I guess he was pretty serious, then, about making everything up to me. I wasn’t sure where that put us, but one thing was for sure. “This means I’m going on a date.”

 

She was about to ask me something, but her question was interrupted by a beeping sound, which only meant one thing: incoming call. I looked at the phone to see it was Chuck calling. I needed to take this.

 

I interrupted Holly and said, “Sorry, Holly, I’m getting another call I have to take. We’ll talk about this later, if you want, okay?”

 

“Okay, sure. Just take care of yourself.”

 

“I will.” And with that, I switched the call over to Chuck and said, “Hello?”

 

His voice was warm and sweet and I swear I felt something in me just _relax_ at hearing him on the other line, even though all he initially said was, “Hi Kiz.”

 

I couldn’t help the smile. “Hey, Chuck. So, I see you were busy yesterday.”

 

“Ah, you saw the video?”

 

“I did. Just now, actually.”

 

“What did you think?”

 

“It was … it was amazing. I know there are people calling it a fake or a hoax or whatever, but it seemed like you really got through to who mattered, and that was exactly what I wanted. Thank you.”

 

“You’re welcome. I was just doing as you asked.”

 

“That really means a lot to me. And, it means you passed my little test.”

 

I heard him chuckle faintly on the other line. “Oh, so you’re testing God now?”

 

“A little bit, maybe. I told myself that if you passed, then I would go on a date with you.”

 

Silence initially met my statement, followed by, “Really? You want to go on a date? Are you sure?”

 

I chuckled nervously. “I guess, yeah. I mean, this is still really weird and surreal and everything, but …” I bit my lips, trying to figure out how I wanted to word the next part, “… I don’t know. I feel like I maybe might want to possibly give this a shot.”

 

A moment’s pause again, then, “You do?”

 

“Yeah, I do,” I replied softly, gulping down my nervousness. I hadn’t expected to face this so soon, and my nerves were doing their best to get a hold of me and turn me away, but something deep inside me anchored me on this path. Something in my subconscious _wanted_ me on this path, and so, despite my hesitations, I would walk it. I hoped this meant that Chuck wouldn’t ramp up the pressure on me, now that it seemed I might be giving in to him, but that was a chance I was just going to have to take. My whole life after running away had been about taking chances, so that wasn’t really anything new. It just seemed different because the stakes were higher. But, that could mean that there was a lot to gain, should this all work out, so why the hell not. _Live a little, Kismet, isn’t that what Chuck said?_

 

“Great! That’s wonderful,” he exclaimed. “Are you free tonight, possibly? Or is that too soon? We can do something this weekend, or even next week if you want to wait …”

 

Well, that was something that he was willing to put off our date, something good, but I didn’t want to put it off. I was a firm believer in getting this over with, so I interrupted him and said, “Tonight is fine. I didn’t really have much planned since I’m on vacation and I like to leave my days open.”

 

“Alright. Say, 6:30? I can take you to dinner.”

 

“Sounds perfect. See you then.” I didn’t even ask if he knew my address or not as we hung up, as I was pretty sure that was a stupid question at this point. He may not know everything, but he knew where I lived. As I poured myself a cup of coffee, I contemplated how to spend the day. I suspected no matter what I did, I wouldn’t be able to concentrate much, so maybe a little TV binge watching before I got ready for tonight. Yeah, that sounded like fun. House Hunters was doing a mini-marathon, and I always enjoyed hate watching that show, so that sounded perfect. I didn’t really hate the show, per se, just the super pickiness of some of the people on the show. It was fun, though. Holly never understood the concept of hate watching, but I couldn’t help myself. So, I chilled on the couch with my coffee and my show, laughing at the crazy, sometimes conflicting requirements and the dramatic, picky clients.

 

I checked my phone and saw it was closer to noon than I’d thought. It seemed lunch and not breakfast was on the menu. So, I grabbed some tabbouleh salad that I had picked up at the local Trader Joe’s along with some assorted veggies and hummus because _fuck I couldn’t get enough of that shit_. I swore I could live in a house made of hummus and be perfectly happy. I munched away between sips of water as I continued the marathon, still absently thinking about tonight. I wondered where he would take me and how this whole thing would go. As the hours passed, my nervousness started to grow to the point where I couldn’t even sit and watch TV anymore, I had to get up and _do_ something, even if it wasn’t much. I just couldn’t sit around anymore.

 

It was super early, still, but I started up my shower, adjusting the water temperature before I stepped in. My hair actually would have been fine to leave as it was for the date, but washing and drying and spot curling it would prove a nice distraction. So, once my hair was wet, I lathered up my shampoo and started washing it, making sure every strand was thoroughly coated before I leaned back and rinsed. As I poured some conditioner in my hands and worked it through my hair, I decided why the hell not make it a productive shower. While the conditioner sat in my hair, I grabbed my razor and shaving gel and propped my leg up on the ledge and gave myself a shave. It was barely stubbly, and with the winter looming I didn’t shave nearly as often, but I figured might as well occupy myself as much as possible before this date. Anything to ignore the butterflies that were tearing through my stomach at the moment.

 

Rinsing the shave gel off my legs, I quickly scrubbed down my body before rinsing the conditioner out of my hair. Once I got all the suds off of my body, I took a few minutes to just stand there under the water, trying to get a handle on my swirling thoughts before I shut the water off. I was about to go on a date with _God_. Yeah. _Just how did my life get to this?_

 

Stepping out, I tied a towel around me as I ran a brush through my hair, working out my tangles. Once I had my hair smoothed out, I pulled out my hair dryer and went to work, letting the noise of the dryer drown out what various thoughts that were trying to flit through my head. Instead, I focused on my hair, on brushing and drying each section until it was good and dry, hanging warm against my shoulders and back. I pulled out my curling iron and set it on the sink to heat up, but it would be a little bit before it was ready, and I had a couple of things to do first. Before I left the bathroom, I hung my towel up and pulled on my cream coloured satin robe, relishing the silky feel against my skin before I trekked into my room to look through my closet and figure out just what I wanted to wear.

 

Since I didn’t know where we were going, I wasn’t aware of any dress code or what I should aim for. A dress seemed like a pretty safe option, even if it ended up being casual, it was just a question of what kind of look I wanted to go for. I didn’t want to dress too provocatively, but most of my dresses - aside from those I wore to work, which I deemed too stuffy for a date - showed some sort of skin. I just had to decide how much and what kind. I eventually settled on a dark red dress, whose initial strapless sheath was covered in lace that extended over the lower neckline and formed 3/4 sleeves, even dipping a few inches below the hemline. _Red is classic, right?_ I thought as I pulled it out and hung it up, pulling out a pair of pale gold heels with a subtle sparkle and setting them on the floor underneath them. Now that that was settled, on to finishing getting ready.

 

My curler was nice and heated up by the time I made it back into the bathroom, and I ran a brush through my hair one more time to make sure it was tangle free before I started separating and curling some sections near the bottom. My hair had a natural wave to it, but I liked to emphasize it a little bit sometimes. I didn’t like a full head of curls, but some near the bottom of my hair looked rather nice. I just didn’t like the full lion’s mane feeling I got when I curled the whole thing, I liked the hair by my face to be sleek. I took my time separating out the sections I wanted and curling them, carefully finger combing them until they looked just right. It was getting on the long side, coming just below my breasts, and I was overdue for a trim, I just hadn’t had the motivation to go to the salon recently. Patrick, my hairstylist, was going to _kill_ me for waiting so long. I swore he cared about my hair more than I did at times.

 

When I deemed my hair sufficiently curled, I spritzed a little bit of hairspray on the ends, just to set it, then tapped my short fingernails on the surface of the sink while I eyed my makeup bag, wondering if I should go ahead and apply it. I checked the time on my phone. _3:56._ I had plenty of time, yet, might as well continue while I was on a roll.

 

My every day makeup look was pretty basic, just foundation, mascara, a little eyeliner. I rarely actually wore lipstick, but when I did I tended to stick to nude colours, preferring that over bright reds or pinks or corals or other random colours that some women sported. Besides my normal makeup job, I smudged some dark eye shadow around my eyes to give it a smokey affect. Not too dark, though … I didn’t wanna look like a raccoon, after all. Once I deemed it just right, I smeared on some nude matte lipstick and declared my work done. I had really taken my time with my makeup, as normally I could get it done in about ten minutes. When I looked at the clock, I saw I’d eaten up an hour as it was close to 5pm. Still had about an hour and a half to wait, though, so I meandered into the kitchen and poured myself a glass of wine, hoping it would help grant me a little courage and calm my nerves.

 

I lounged on the couch in my robe, my hair and makeup done, just wiling away the time as I flipped through random articles on my phone. It gave me something to do, something to focus on while I waited, and it wasn’t until I looked up and saw that the time was 6:25 that I shot up off the couch and raced into my room, pulling on my dress and shoes and grabbing my purse and coat. My hands were shaking slightly as I locked my apartment door, pulling on my black pea coat and buttoning it up as I headed for the elevator. As I descended to the ground floor, I took a moment to just _breathe_ and calm down a little bit before I walked out, wondering if I should expect a vehicle or not.

 

I didn’t see anyone outside as I glanced through the secure glass doors, but in the split second that I looked down to open the door, Chuck was standing at the foot of the steps by the entrance. Dressed in simple black slacks, a black blazer, and a white button up shirt with no tie, I felt a little more comfortable with my wardrobe choice. I smiled at him, somewhat nervous, and he returned it, beaming with happiness. “So, where are we off to tonight?” I asked as I joined him at the foot of the steps.

 

“A little place I’ve grown fond of in upstate New York,” he replied, offering me the crook of his arm.

 

“Ah, so no vehicle tonight?” I replied as I set my hand in his arm.

 

He chuckled. “No, but I think you’ll find this much less disconcerting than angel flight.”


	9. Chapter 9

The world blinked out for just a second, but when it came back into view, we were in the parking lot of a rather nice looking establishment. I could have blinked and missed how we got there, it was that quick. I also didn’t feel that lurching in the pit of my stomach that had usually had me concentrating on holding down whatever food I’d eaten. However Chuck had gotten us here, it had been completely painless and pretty much instant. _That’s gotta come in handy_.

 

Because of the trending nature of the video that had been taken, I was wondering if anyone would try to accost or harass us, but nobody approached us aside from the hostess and the waiter. I didn’t know if that was because nobody recognized Chuck or if maybe he was pulling something behind the scenes, but I couldn’t find it in myself to care either way. My nervousness was starting to ramp up, and I considered ordering a glass of wine, but I thought better of myself and stuck with water. They thankfully had several vegetarian options, and I went with the vegetable linguini, the zucchini and mushrooms sounding good to me. I was always down for pasta, anyway.

 

As the waiter took our menus away, I nervously sipped from my glass of water, my palms starting to sweat. I surreptitiously wiped them on my dress, under the table, trying to get a hold of myself. It was just so _odd_ , still, to witness Chuck’s power and see him be so nonchalant about the whole thing. I supposed to him it was no big deal to just teleport anywhere he wanted, but it was still all new to me. Maybe I could take him out for a spin in the country sometime, just a nice long drive with no particular destination in mind? Show him just how nice it could be to enjoy the ride, enjoy what _he_ created. _Um, are we already planning a second date when the first one isn’t even over with?_ I shook my head slightly to banish that line of thinking.

 

“So,” he started as he set his water glass back on the table, “what exactly made you want to go on a date?”

 

I pursed my lips, trying to figure out what I wanted to say and how. “Well, I mean, when I first met you I didn’t want to have anything to do with you.”

 

“I kinda figured that out when you slapped me.”

 

I chuckled. “Yeah. Sorry about that, by the way.”

 

“No, it’s okay. I deserved it, and more, really.”

 

This was so weird, talking to _God_ about deserved punishment. I shook my head again, trying to focus. _If I’m going to get over this thing, I have to stop thinking about him like that. Not God. Chuck._ “Well, whatever the case, I was ready to forget you the moment I stepped out of … wherever we were. But Gabriel stopped me before I could leave, and he did his damnedest to get me to at least give you a chance.” I took a breath, needing to pause and gather my resolve to finish my thoughts. “Honestly, I’m not really sure what made me agree to that. Maybe I was just tired, maybe it was the knowledge of the onslaught of stress I was about to get at work, maybe it was something else, I don’t know. But, if I say I’m going to do something, I’m going to do it.”

 

“So you’re going out on this date with me because of what you promised Gabriel?”

 

“Well, kind of … not exactly …” I chuckled, backing up the train of thought a little bit. “When I agreed to give you a chance, I didn’t even have a date in mind. Tell you truth, I didn’t even know _what_ I had in mind, but it certainly wasn’t getting this kind of intimate with you. When we talked on the phone and you asked if we could met up and talk, in a non-date kind of way, I realized that _that_ was giving you a chance. And, hell, it was as low pressure as I figured I’d get, so I took it.”

 

He nodded, listening intently. It was almost unnerving the way I seemed to hold his attention, to know that I sat across from the epitome of divine power and all of it was focused on little old _me._

 

_Not God. Chuck._

 

“So you decided during our coffee shop chat that you would go out on a date?”

 

“Again, not exactly … I wasn’t really sure what to expect from it, but if I’m being honest, being able to tell you what I told you, to get that off of my chest … it felt like a relief, like something had been lifted from me. Like, I had some sort of closure.” I gestured, “I’m not really sure what it was, but after I left the shop I was sitting in my car and I decided that if you did what you promised, that if you confronted the cult … that would show that you were serious about making things right, and if you did do that, then I would reciprocate.”

 

“Ah, so a date for my deed, then?”

 

“Yeah, yeah I guess so.”

 

He smiled. “Well I’m glad I proved myself to you. And I would do it all again if I had to.” He concentrated his gaze at me. “Do I have to?”

 

“Do you have to do what?”

 

“Is there something else I need to do? Something else I need to fulfill for you? Because I’ll do it, no questions asked.”

 

I shook my head. “No, that was really the only loose ends I’ve ever had. And I’m really happy you did that. Also, kind of surprised you allowed it to be broadcast on facebook?”

 

He chuckled. “Well, I figured it wouldn’t harm anything, and plus it would help prove to you that I kept my word.”

 

I nodded. “Fair enough.”

 

The conversation lapsed into a lull for a moment, but it only felt slightly awkward, like there was at least a small level of comfortability forged between us. A small one, but it was there nonetheless. I didn’t know quite what to make of it. It was at that time that our soups came out, his a hearty steak and potato variety, my own a vegetable medley in a tomato base that was slightly spicy. We both tucked in and I was grateful for the provided distraction. After we’d taken a few bites each, he asked, “So, did you order vegetarian everything on purpose, or do you just really like vegetables?”

 

I grinned. “I did it on purpose. I’m vegetarian.”

 

“Really? Any particular reason?”

 

“You mean like moral or ethical reasons? No, not really. I just never enjoyed the taste of meat and when I left the cult and was experimenting, I found that it was actually what was making me sick. Once I cut out meat, I felt great, so I’ve stuck to it ever since.”

 

“Interesting. Ever considered going vegan?”

 

I laughed. “No, I like my dairy products too much, and fortunately they don’t seem to make me sick like meat does.”

 

“Well that is good. I … didn’t take into account any dietary restrictions you might have when I thought of this place.”

 

I laughed. “Well, it all worked out. I didn’t tell you, either, so …” I shrugged, accepting part of the blame. After all, he wasn’t a mind reader, it’s not like he could have known if I hadn’t told him, and I hadn’t told him. I wasn’t sure why, I mean it’s something that _should_ be said so the other person can take it into consideration. I supposed I was just so nervous it slipped my mind.

 

We lapsed into a much more casual kind of conversation as we made our way through our soup, and by the time we were done, our main courses were delivered. He had his steak medium rare and my pasta dish was still steaming when it was sat down. It smelled absolutely delicious and we both started eating immediately. I unintentionally moaned when I took my first bite; I’d purposefully filled the fork with veggies and pasta and plenty of sauce and it was exquisite. Simple, rustic, but sometimes that was the best taste of all. “I take it your meal is good, then?”

 

I chuckled. “Yeah, really good. You’ve been here before, you said?”

 

He nodded, reaching for his drink. “I discovered this place completely by accident, actually, but it was probably the best accident I’ve ever made.”

 

“How did you ‘accidentally’ stumble upon this place?”

 

He chuckled, cutting another piece out of his steak as he explained, “I was actually aiming for another part of the state, dunno why but I guess I was distracted and I completely missed it. I was confused for a minute or two but realized I was hungry so I might as well stop in for a bite.”

 

“So what did you have that impressed you so much?”

 

“A burger, about yea thick, cooked to about medium, with some prosciutto, sauteed spinach, and a fried egg on top.”

 

I raised my eyebrows. “Sounds impressive.”

 

“Oh it was. Nice and juicy, the egg was just runny enough that it made it even juicier, the prosciutto was nice and salty and added just enough bite, and the spinach was nice and tender and just melt in your mouth. I took one bite and for just a second felt like I was back in heaven.”

 

I smirked. “Something to add to their resume, then. ‘Burgers so good, they’re certified heavenly’.”

 

He laughed and we lapsed into another silence, this one slightly more comfortable with the last. I couldn’t say for sure what it was, but the longer we hung out and interacted, the more okay I felt with it. I wouldn’t say that I was falling in love with him or anything like that just yet, but his presence was crossing the threshold of tolerable and into the territory of welcome. And that I counted as an improvement. I wasn’t really sure where exactly I stood with him - I had an idea, though it wasn’t something I wanted to think about - but I didn’t feel like I was ready for that kind of a deep conversation. Just thinking about a conversation involving the “l” word - whether that was just “like” or full on “love” - made my skin want to crawl. Needless to say, I was glad that he skirted any conversation that could potentially lead to that, sticking to more “get to know you” kind of topics. I returned the questions as much as I could, but sometimes it was like, am I really asking the God of the universe what colour he prefers or what hobbies he has?

 

_Not God. Chuck._ I had to remind myself of this several times. I hoped it would stick eventually.

 

As dinner wound down, we were both too full for dessert. If Chuck was feeling anything like I was, he was about full to bursting. I swore I was about to split some seams, myself. I was supremely glad that I had a long, layered jacket to put on because I was pretty sure I was sporting a nice-sized food baby. _Note to self, if we have dinner again, go with a loose top._ I wondered briefly how the dinner would be paid for - does God have a credit card? - but when the waiter brought the check he simply plunked down a $100 bill and asked me if I was ready to go.

 

“You aren’t going to wait for change?”

 

He shook his head. “Nah, I usually leave extra like that. Money has no real meaning for me, but it does for other people, so I help where I can.”

 

_Huh_. “So that’s why we got the best table in the house and prompt service.”

 

He grinned. “Possibly. But I still would have left it, regardless.” Chuck was just getting more and more interesting as he lead me out of the restaurant and into the parking lot, probably just putting on the show of going to a car for the benefit of everyone else, who would be wondering where the hell we literally disappeared to if he’d just zapped us directly out of there. As we approached the belly of the parking lot, far away from the other patrons, he turned to face me. “Well, I hope you enjoyed tonight.”

 

“Yeah, yeah I did.”

 

“Think you’d want to do this again, then?”

 

I smiled. When the evening had begun, I wasn’t sure if I would really be doing this again or not. I’d decided to wait and see how it went to decide, and the date had gone well, so I had no objections to a second date. “Sure. If you’d like, I’ll plan this one. Just show up around 2:30-ish on Friday and I’ll take you on a ride.”

 

“Switching off dates, are we?”

 

I chuckled. “Maybe. If you want.”

 

“Sounds fine to me.” There was a certain twinkle in his eye and even though we were ending the date platonically, he still looked like he was over the moon. Pretty sure he would have given me said moon if I’d asked for it. There was something about that sparkle … something that spoke to a part deep inside me, something that wanted to see that sparkle again. He raised his arm to my shoulder and in a blink we were standing back outside my apartment building. He licked his lips as he said, “Have a good evening, Kiz. See you on Friday.”

 

I nodded. “See you.” And just like that, he was gone again, leaving me standing on the stoop alone.

 

I sighed as I let myself into the building, fumbling for the button on the elevator and waiting for it to come as called. I wasn’t waiting long before I boarded an empty elevator, leaning against the wall after I pressed the correct floor. I closed my eyes as I rode up, just taking in the entirety of what I’d just experienced and trying to analyze every little aspect of it. Chuck had proven himself to me once, but I was checking for consistency, and so far it seemed he checked out. I couldn’t recall a time in the evening where he said or did anything that ran contrary to how to directly presented himself. A part of me wanted to give up and give in, but another part of me - a bigger part of me - was still cautious and guarded, leery of who he was and what he wanted.

 

I shook my head as I walked down the familiar hallway to my apartment. _You promised to give him a chance._ And I was still doing that. But at what point was my promise deemed fulfilled? Was it after our phone call? Or maybe our talk at the coffee shop? First date, perhaps? If not by now, then when? As I entered my apartment, even though I was feeling more at peace about hanging out with him, I still had just as many questions as I’d had going into this, if not _more_. I grabbed a bottle of Riesling and poured myself a glass, taking a long sip from it. _Welp, nothing a night of wine and trash TV can’t cure._ With my plan of inaction decided, I kicked off my shoes, hung up my dress, pulled on my robe, and settled onto the sofa to veg and allow my subconscious to process the events of the evening.


	10. Chapter 10

When Chuck arrived back at the bunker after dinner, he felt like he was floating on a cloud, which was saying something considering he had done that very thing before. The Winchesters and Castiel looked up at his return but didn’t say anything as Chuck made his way back to his designated room in the bunker. Normally Chuck would have traveled back to heaven, but ever since learning Kismet was on earth, he was determined to not return unless he had her with him. Of course, that prospect seemed a lot simpler before he met her, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to stay true to it. It just … wouldn’t feel right without having her there with him.

 

Gabriel was the only one who followed him. The youngest of the archangels, he had always deeply loved his family, and his time away from them didn’t mean he loved them less. If anything, he wanted his family reunited once more, and it was slowly coming together. Chuck had reconciled with Amara, and during that time she had insisted on reconnecting with the children, too. Children being the archangels, specifically Lucifer and Michael. And so, Chuck and Amara had sat them down and actually talked with them. Not to them, _with_ them. It took a lot to get through to the two elder archangels, but after much effort from all parties involved, they had all come to an understanding. Not just an understanding, however … a true reunion, a return to where they had been all those ages ago and even better, where they were meant to be. Kismet was the only missing piece of the puzzle … and Gabriel was going to make damn sure it all came together. It just wouldn’t do to have his family back together but his Father lonely and without companionship.

 

Chuck was slipping out of his jacket when Gabriel closed the door behind him and asked, “Well?” He didn’t have to ask the full question, the implication was obvious.

 

His Father smiled. “It went wonderful. We’re going out again Friday afternoon, actually.”

 

“Wonderful? _And_ a second date? Wow. That’s … that’s awesome!” There was still a hint of caution in Gabriel’s eyes, and Chuck smiled as he reached out to grasp the archangel’s shoulder reassuringly.

 

“It’s going to work out, Gabriel.”

 

“I know, I just …”

 

“Don’t worry.”

 

Gabriel sighed, trying his damnedest to shove aside the doubts and the fears. “I’m trying. Everything is just going so well so far, I don’t want it to stop, not now.”

 

“And it won’t. I think Kiz and I have made great strides toward reconciliation and it’s going even better than I expected after our first meeting. It will take time, but I’m willing to wait for this.” He clapped the Gabriel’s shoulder and let it go before walking to the closet and hanging up his jacket. “Just wait with me, okay, Gabe?” The archangel nodded, obviously wishing for a quicker resolution. “Besides,” Chuck added, “in the meantime, you always have Sam.”

 

There was the grin that Gabriel was famous for. For being a prankster and the resident comedian of the archangels, he tended to suffer extreme bouts of melancholy. But he always came back around, especially if there was incentive. _Especially_ if the incentive was Sam Winchester.

 

Even though he was determined to wait for her, Friday couldn’t come soon enough for Chuck. Every time he saw her it was like he couldn’t get enough of her, of her presence, her voice, her smile once she actually started giving him a few. Oh yes, the first time he saw her smile was special, something he would always remember for the rest of eternity. Every subsequent one after that was beautiful, and he couldn’t get enough of them, but that first one was undoubtedly the best. In it, her soul had shone through and he could _see_ the shining glory that he’d hand sculpted. It had been so long since he’d gazed at her soul, but even so a dormant soul is far different than one occupying a living vessel. It was like he was truly seeing her for the first time, and it took his breath away. Oh yes, he would wait as long as he had to for her.

 

When Friday afternoon finally did roll around, it did so with little fanfare for the rest of the world. In the bunker, though, Gabriel watched Chuck like a hawk, hovering as he drank his coffee and ate breakfast and attempted to read to pass the time until Sam finally rolled his eyes and hauled the archangel back to their room to distract him. Chuck was eternally grateful to the younger Winchester for the breathing room to relax, as he was suddenly nervous once more. He was eager to see Kismet, of course, but he was already feeling their connection pulsing strong and he really wanted nothing more than to be with her all the time, as intimately as possible. Not necessarily sexual, just _close_. In a way that only soulmates could truly experience. But she didn’t sense it, not yet, and so she didn’t feel quite the same as he did. Not yet, anyway. He hoped she would soon, because every time he left her it was like he had an itch he just couldn’t scratch. Spending time with her, talking with her, it eased it a little bit. True intimacy was the only balm that would soothe that particular ache, but for now Chuck would take what he could get.

 

He dressed simply, casually, in jeans and a t-shirt before pulling on a hooded jacket and transporting himself to the steps outside of Kismet’s apartment. She had just turned around to make sure the large glass door latched shut, bundled up in an oatmeal sweater that looked thick and warm, perfect for the chilly autumn in Minnesota. As she turned around to see him standing there, he couldn’t help but smile at the sight of her, that frustrating ache starting to lessen once more for him. She returned his smile and joined him at the foot of the steps, her arms falling to her sides and letting her sweater hang open. She wore a simple muted green shirt underneath, one that perfectly mimicked the colour of her eyes, something that Chuck swore it was almost impossible to pry his gaze from. He licked his lips as he asked, “So, where are we off to today?”

 

“Well, first stop is the garage so I can grab my car.”

 

“You sure? I can just take us wherever we need to go.”

 

She chuckled. “Today isn’t about the destination, Chuck, it’s about the _journey_.”

 

He conceded with a slight bow of his head. “Lead the way, then.” He followed her around to the side of the apartment building and down a sloped piece of pavement until she stopped and entered a code at the sliding door. “Underground garage?”

 

“Yeah. It’s a big reason why I chose this apartment. Don’t have to worry about shoveling _and_ it’s heated in the winter, too, so I don’t have to freeze between the car and the apartment.”

 

Once the door was open, she lead the way to her designated parking spot and they loaded up for the drive. Chuck wasn’t sure where they would end up, but since she said the journey was what was important, he just sat back and let her take control.

 

After she had navigated out of the garage and parking lot of her apartment building and was sitting at a red light, she reached back into the back seat of her car and pulled a CD book from the floorboard and handed it to Chuck. “Go ahead, pick the music.”

 

“You’re trusting me with the soundtrack for this trip?”

 

She chuckled. “Just curious what you might go with.”

 

He opened the book as he said, “I’m surprised you haven’t converted to playing all your music through your phone, like everyone else.”

 

“Well, I ain’t anyone else. For one, I accumulated this music after I left the cult, back when CDs were the thing. For two, this car is too old to do that kind of thing anyway so even if I wanted to, I’d have to upgrade my car, which I don’t want to do because it’s perfectly fine.”

 

“Sounds like a good enough reason to me.” He flipped through the sheets, both surprised and impressed at the variety available. Various rock albums from the 60’s to the 90’s, in all styles from metal to glam and everything in between. Random pop albums, mostly from the 80’s but a couple of Lady Gaga and others mixed in. Some electronic compilations. R&B. He contemplated a few of them, but ultimately pulled out a Sam Cooke compilation called _Portrait of a Legend_.

 

As soon as the first strains of the first song came on, Kiz exclaimed, “Ohhh so God likes soul music, huh?”

 

Chuck grinned. “I like all kinds, really. Of all things humans invented, music is definitely one of the best. Sam is one of my personal favourites.”

 

Her eyebrow quirked curiously. “You have favourites.”

 

“Not many,” he winked.

 

“Well well well, learn something knew every day.”

 

Kiz continued driving down the road, sometimes absently half-singing along with some of the songs as she tapped her fingers on the steering wheel. Chuck tried his best to not stare only at her and looked out the window. It was a perfect day for driving, the sun was bright, the air was crisp, and Kismet knew the best route to take so they ended up on a road with minimal traffic. They could then simply enjoy the scenery, the passing trees that were beginning to turn with the season, and the occasional lake that they passed by or over, some large, some small. _I might have overdone it a little bit with the lakes here,_ Chuck absently thought as he watched a hawk fly overhead, circling some sort of prey. They had long passed the large cities and towns that surrounded the Twin Cities area and were out in the country now, enveloped only by land as far as the eye could see. It was stark and amazing and beautiful all at once, a reminder of what the earth had once looked like before humans had started developing cities. There were some stretches that, had Kiz not filled up her car prior to leaving, they would have run out of gas and been 20 miles or more from the next station. Fortunately, she’d had the presence of mind to prepare, and she was also with God, so any problems he could easily take care of if needed.

 

After the first album finished, she directed him to choose another one. He flipped through the book once more and selected David Bowie’s _Aladdin Sane_ , far different than the first one and yet just as enjoyable. Kismet laughed as it started playing, remarking, “I guess it figures you like him. Though, for the longest time I would have thought you’d consider him a filthy heathen.”

 

“Oh, he is, but I love filthy heathens. They’re some of the best people,” he replied with a wink.

 

She chuckled and Chuck saw the light blush creep into her cheeks as she fell silent, concentrating on the road in front of her and David’s lilting voice. Chuck split his time between looking at the nature that surrounded them and at the driver. She’d left her hair long and loose, and let its natural wave to its thing, which he loved. Of course, she looked good no matter what, but natural, untouched by makeup or anything else was the best. It was the base that he’d made himself, sculpted and fine-tuned from her full lips and slightly dimpled chin to the dusting of freckles across her shoulders and her long, slender fingers. Every inch of her vessel he had designed and even though he’d done little more than touch her shoulder, he knew her intimately. He knew every little crevice, every single place that would make her breath hitch before she moaned. Every sensitive place where he could poke and prod, lick and kiss, tease and touch to drive her wild with desire. But more than that, he knew how she would want to be held, how she would snuggle into him, the sleep position she preferred and the temperature she preferred her room at when she slept. He knew all of this, and yet he could not act on it, not yet. It killed him to not even reach over and take her hand, but he resisted. Despite the rocky start, everything was going so well, and he didn’t want to risk pushing her too far. So, in spite of the desperate need that was constantly building inside of him, he tore his eyes from her and looked out the window once more, _The Jean Genie_ played on.

 

A little under four hours after they left Kiz’s apartment, they reached the town of Bemidji, Minnesota. After grabbing some sandwiches from a local shop, she drove them over to Diamond Point Park, a lakeside park where they could eat at a picnic table, mostly in peace. There was a small crowd there on a Friday evening, but not as many people had it been only a couple of months before. Had they come during the summer, cars would have been in a constant rotation of putting in and pulling out boats from the launcher. As it was, it was a little too cold to go out on the lake, though a few souls did anyway just out of spite. They chose the closest picnic table available and dug in, Chuck enjoying the traditional Italian while Kismet had, of course, gone with the vegetarian, the only sandwich option with no meat. Chuck had suggested trying to find another spot, but she had brushed it off, saying that she wouldn’t be a vegetarian if she didn’t enjoy vegetables. He had shook his head, pulling out a $50 bill out of his wallet and handing it over before she could protest, refusing the change and requesting it be put in the tip jar. The young college student who waited on them just looked at him wide-eyed, confirming that he didn’t want his change, and Chuck simply nodded and smiled as they both left.

 

After finishing and throwing away their trash in the nearest can, they took a few minutes to walk around the park, enjoying the relative quiet provided. Their conversation was friendly and casual, a far cry from their first meeting that was full of fire and emotions. It was while they were walking that Chuck decided _fuck it_ and reached over and pulled her hand into his. To his great relief, she didn’t pull away or even say anything about it, simply accepted it and kept walking. At that, Chuck felt himself relax slightly, relishing in the feel of her skin against his. It just felt so comfortable, so _right_ , like it was meant to be. Like it was always meant to be. He wanted to ask her if she felt this, this connection, but he felt that might be pushing things too far too fast for tonight. He decided to leave the heavier discussion for another time, enjoying her company while he had it for the moment.

 

As the sun went down and the wind that picked up got chilly, they headed back to the car. Chuck was fine, of course, but Kiz was only wearing a sweater with a t-shirt underneath, and while she was quite used to the lower temps, she wasn’t immune to the cold. Once back in the car, she had Chuck select another album to listen to on the way back to her apartment, and this time he selected _Purple Rain_ by Prince and the Revolution. Kismet supposed she shouldn’t have been too surprised, considering his previous choices, but she still raised her eyebrows a little bit. She wondered for a moment if he’d seen the movie, but by the way he followed along in the title track, she was pretty sure he had. She gave in and belted it out with him as she drove down the darkened highway, only her own headlights and the headlights of the occasional passing car lighting the way. Even the moon was hiding behind the clouds, peeking out only here and there to reflect off of the passing lakes before ducking behind cover again. Despite the low light, it was still a beautiful ride, filled with music and singing and laughter. Once _Purple Rain_ had ended, Chuck slipped in Wham!’s _Make It Big_ , and between “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go” and “Careless Whisper” they covered the rest of the ground between where they were and the Twin Cities. Seeing the city lit up in the distance was quite a sight, a familiar sight that Kismet visibly relaxed at seeing. Most probably wouldn’t have even noticed it, but Chuck was looking right at her and he couldn’t help but grin. This little road trip had been informal and casual and everything he felt they needed. He wanted her to feel comfortable and secure around him, and she seemed to relax a little more each time they went out. He was reluctant to push her much further tonight, but he was pleased with the progress all the same.

 

It was close to midnight by the time she finally pulled up to her apartment building, opening the garage door via remote control before easing into her assigned space. She turned to Chuck as she cut the engine and asked, “Walk me up to my apartment?”

 

He grinned widely. “Of course.”

 

As they walked across the heated underground garage, he bumped his hand into hers, almost holding his breath wondering if she would accept the gesture again, and a rush of relief flooded him when she immediately moved to take his hand. They chit chatted about nothing in particular as they waited for the elevator, and as they entered the metal box, Chuck just had to ask, “So, what would you say to another date?”

 

She grinned, unable to hide the blush that crept into her cheeks. “Yeah, that sounds like fun.”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

He felt like his heart was soaring as he asked, “What about tomorrow?”

 

Kiz bit her lip. “I actually have plans for tomorrow night. But I’m free on Sunday.”

 

Chuck nodded. As much as he wanted to claim her as his own, he wanted her to have freedom and her own life. “Sounds like a plan, then.”

 

“It’s supposed to be the Lord’s Day anyway, isn’t it?”

 

It was Chuck’s turn to laugh as they stepped off the elevator. “Is around noon okay?”

 

“That early?”

 

“Well, gotta take into account the time difference.”

 

“Time difference? For what?”

 

“You’ll see,” Chuck replied with a wink.

 

She smiled, a nice, genuine smile. “Alright, then. Noon it is.”

 

They paused as they had arrived outside her door. She had her key in hand and reached up to unlock her door, but paused with her hand on the handle as she looked back up at Chuck. She licked her lips and the pursed them, looking like she wanted to say something. In the end, she just said, “Well, good night, Chuck.”

 

He nodded, feeling a similar, almost overwhelming urge to say or do something, but he similarly wished her, “Good night, Kiz.”

 

As she shut the door behind her, he couldn’t help the creeping smile that spread across his face. He stood there for just a moment, reveling in it before he zapped himself back to the bunker.

 

Just because it was late didn’t mean shit. Both Winchester boys and their angels were still up, and not just to watch for his return, though Chuck was sure that Gabriel had been keeping at eye out at the very least, between whatever b-movie series they had been marathoning. The couples were on opposite ends of the large couch, Dean curled into Cas’ side as Gabriel was splayed over Sam’s lap. He was the first to look up as Chuck walked by, calling out, “Hey! Was wondering if you were coming home at all.”

 

“Of course, why wouldn’t I?”

 

Chuck should have known better, he really should have, as if the creeping smirk on Gabriel’s face didn’t give it away. “Oh I dunno, thought you might have been banging Mom.”

 

Dean choked on the beer he was drinking and, if it was at all possible, Chuck felt a slight heat creep into his cheeks. “No, no we haven’t progressed to that yet.”

 

“Not yet? Well when are you gonna pull the trigger, Daddy-O?”

 

“When she’s ready.”

 

Gabriel rolled his eyes. “I forgot how much of a sap you were.”

 

“Look at who’s talking,” Chuck replied, gesturing to where Gabriel was nuzzling Sam’s neck, just underneath his jawline.

 

Gabriel stuck out his tongue at him before he switched his attention back to the movie and Chuck snickered and shook his head as he made his way back to his room. Instead of feeling spent, he was still buzzing. Despite the fact that he had spent half the day with her, somehow it didn’t feel like enough, and he couldn’t wait until he saw her again on Sunday. Reclining back on his bed, he rested his head on his palms, looking up at the ceiling and letting his eyes slowly un-focus. He had an idea of what he wanted to do on Sunday, but he spent the next few hours plotting and planning, wanting to make it perfect. Maybe something akin to the way he would have wanted to meet her had her birth and life gone as planned. He felt like he had gotten past that neutral point and he was trying to slowly make his way into something more. There was something inside him that tugged him close to her when they were together and ached when they were apart. Was this a part of what having a soulmate was like? While he had created it and witnessed it many, many times over, he had never actually experienced it himself. He knew now that looking in from the outside was vastly different than witnessing it personally unfold within oneself. Now that he had started down this path, he knew he could never go back. And he didn’t want to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh yeah, BTW, I totally recommend giving to listen to each of the albums mentioned in the chapter. They are wonderful classics that deserve a listen if you haven't already.


	11. Chapter 11

As I closed the door on Chuck, a rush of emotions crested in me that I couldn’t quite describe. It was almost like … like I didn’t want him to leave. But what exactly was I expecting? It was close to midnight, last I’d checked the time, I had to go to bed. I shook my head to try to shake the weird feeling. _Get a hold of yourself, Kiz, seriously_. _You’re being weird._ I was too tired from the day that I didn’t think anything else as I stripped out of my clothes, pulled on my slip nightgown, and crawled into bed. I figured I could always think about it tomorrow.

 

I slept in fairly late, no surprise there. I wasn’t one to stay up late and the few times I did, I usually regretted it the next day. I would probably be up late tonight, too, so I hoped that whatever Chuck was planning wouldn’t be too taxing, because I _knew_ how I was going to feel. It would be worth it, though, going out with my friends always did. I was going to try to watch my intake, though … I really did not want to deal with the aftermath of a hangover, especially if I had plans the next day. _Yeah, that would be great, being all hungover for a date with God._ I sighed and mentally corrected myself. _Not God. Chuck._ Yesterday, for some reason, I hadn’t had to remind myself of it that often while we were together. Maybe because he acted so … _human_. It was an odd way to describe it, but fitting. I had sort of meant what I’d jokingly said to Chuck when I’d let him choose the music. I was genuinely curious as to what he would choose, if anything, and I wasn’t going to lie … I was fully prepared to judge him based on on those choices. However, he made some good choices, some really interesting ones. Bowie and Prince, especially, really had helped shape myself and my music tastes after I’d left the cult. It made me wonder if he somehow knew or if that was just a coincidence.

 

After a late, lazy brunch, I conferred with a couple of my friends over text about where we were going and what we were doing tonight. We eventually decided on going to Lush, because of the combination of great music and vibe for dancing and killer appetizers we could snack on once we inevitably worked up an appetite. Their mixed drinks were also to die for, which is what I usually went for. If that made me a stereotypical woman, then so be it, I just didn’t like straight up alcohol, other than wine.

 

With a location decided, I now had to actually get ready for the night. I wasn’t exactly looking to impress anybody, but I did like to get dolled up every now and then. So I followed a similar routine as I did before my dinner date with Chuck, taking a thorough shower, including a shave, and blow drying my hair before putting some curl into the very ends.Makeup I kept fairly similar, though maybe a little more emphasis on the eyes, since I was going clubbing and not on a date. The natural shade of my lips was fairly red, enough so that I could get away without wearing any lipstick, and I went ahead with it since I was going to be drinking and eating throughout the night.

 

Now that I was mostly put together, I lounged around and sipped some wine while I waited until it was a decent enough hour to meet up with them, pausing only to order some takeout from my favourite Thai place down the street. Definitely a good idea to eat _before_ getting dressed.

 

After my late dinner, I went through my closet, trying to find something to wear. I vetoed a few options until I finally arrived at a little white number, a dress with a low neckline and sleeves that looped around the top of my shoulders. _Guess I’m going with a strapless bra tonight._ In compensation for the exposure up top, the bottom of the hem hit the middle of my knee, though that was probably due more to my height than anything else. No matter, it worked out in my head, so I didn’t worry about it. To complement it, I threw on a gold choker and a pair of heels that had a wonderful snakeskin texture on the outside but was simply gold in colour. _Classy, right?_ I pulled on my black pea coat and transferred anything I would need into a small wallet I could tuck into my dress. I’d had more than one heart attack fucking around with a purse in a club, I wasn’t about to do that shit again. I’d learned my damn lesson, thankfully not at my bank account’s expense. I wasn’t about to press my luck. One short taxi order later, I made my way downstairs and hopped in the cab, directing him on the best way to get to Lush.

 

One obvious reason I took a cab was that I expected to drink and I wasn’t about to either a) leave my car out overnight and have to come back and get it the next day, or b) drive drunk. It was worth it for a little peace of mind. The second reason was that the parking around Lush got _packed_ and quick. If someone did plan on driving there, good luck finding a place to park that wasn’t a few blocks away. That might not be such a bad thing at the start of the night, but after drinking and dancing for hours, the last thing you wanted to do was walk five blocks to get to your ride. Even though my heels were comfortable, I still wasn’t about to do that shit. Sober me planned ahead so drunk me could fully relax and have fun. I think I more than earned it.

 

Steph was easy to spot at the bar as she waved me over from the door after I checked my coat. “Hey! I’m surprised I beat you here.”

 

I laughed. I was usually the early one out of all of my friends. “Well, can’t be number one all the time, right?” I put in a quick order for a Poison Apple cocktail as Steph and I chatted, waiting for Renee. She was usually running late, so that was nothing new, and we finished off a few drinks before she showed up.

 

“Sorry! Sorry!” she apologized as she rushed to join us at the bar.

 

“That just means you’re buying shots,” Steph said with a grin, polishing off a maraschino cherry.

 

Renee rolled her eyes but relented. It was an old standing rule of ours that the last one to the bar bought the first three rounds of shots, and so far Renee usually ended up being the one buying. Steph had fallen a few times, but I never had. It was a crown I wore with pride … the pride of a buzzing drunk woman about to party it up with her friends.

 

“Fine, what do you guys want?”

 

“Ooo, how about we start with Juicy Fruit?” I suggested. It was probably my favourite shot, even though I hadn’t a clue what went in it. It really did taste exactly like the gum that was its namesake. It was also nice and light and always a winner with everyone.

 

“Always a fine selection, as always,” Renee complimented as she put in the order.

 

“You better get Breakfast Cereal next,” Steph mumbled, looking at her nails as she waited for our first round.

 

“Yes, yes, I know you’re in love with those,” Renee replied with an eye roll. Steph was rather fond of the shot that tasted exactly like the milk left over after eating a bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch, but for trademark reasons obviously they couldn’t use that specific name for it. It was a good drink, too, but it sat a little heavy on my stomach and so I tended to only take one or two of those a night.

 

We had to wait a little while for our order to come in, as the night was getting in full swing, but once it came we all clinked our glasses in cheers before we downed the drink. I was already starting to feel a little bit of a buzz, so it complemented how I was feeling perfectly. After that, Renee put in an order for some Breakfast Cereal shots, and then an order of Yellow Cake shots, just to finish off with something sweet. By tradition, once we finished our first three shots, we would go dance. And so, without further ado, once the Yellow Cake was down the hatch, we all simultaneously absconded to the dance floor.

 

Despite growing up in an extremely sheltered cult, I took to dancing in clubs well enough. It wasn’t like ballroom dancing or anything that required a lot of concentration and coordination, you just moved to the music, which was especially easy to do when buzzed. And Lush always had a great playlist to dance to. I was infinitely glad that I was wearing a practically sleeveless dress because it got heated fairly quick. Thank Chuck for makeup primer and setting spray, eh? Otherwise my makeup would have been running like the River Jordan.

 

Once I was out of breath and needing a break, I made my way back to the bar and ordered a quick Passionfruit Martini because I needed something light and refreshing to pick me up after all that dancing. Steph and Renee soon joined me and we took our drinks outside to relax for a minute and talk without the pounding music drowning out our conversation.

 

It was chilly outside without a jacket, but there were heaters placed in strategic areas around the seats, so it wasn’t bad. I actually edged toward the outside, furthest away from the heaters, so I could cool down easier. The music inside could still be heard outside, but it wasn’t nearly as loud. Out here was where people congregated to rest and talk, and Steph and Renee and I quickly got caught up with each other. Steph was currently working toward her masters and Renee was gearing up to take the bar. Both were incredibly busy at the moment, but they both needed a break from studying, and I was more than happy to accompany them clubbing. I was pretty much the constant of the group, hardly anything changed with me. I still worked at the same job, still lived in the same apartment I’d moved into four years prior. Although, there was one difference between the last time we’d hung out and now …

 

“So lemme guess,” Renee started with an eye roll, “you’re still living solidly in Singlesville.”

 

“Well …” That’s wasn’t really entirely true, was it? Were Chuck and I dating? I mean, we had gone on two dates, and had a third set up. What did that mean, though? What did that make us? Were we officially together in some way or were we still feeling each other out? I initially wanted to go with the latter, but after the moments we’d shared, it just felt a little more than something casual. It was confusing, and I still hadn’t really had a chance to really examine what I was feeling and why but it seemed the cat was out of the bag now, so it seemed I had to say something.

 

“Wait,” Steph interrupted, realizing my hesitation. “Don’t tell me you’re actually seeing someone?”

 

I took a deep breath and finished off the rest of my cocktail in one fell swoop, partially because my throat really was parched, partially to give me a moment to think, and also to give me a little boost of courage to confront these feelings.

 

“When did this happen?” Renee asked, now fully invested, her cocktail halfway to her mouth, paused in anticipation.

 

“Few weeks ago.”

 

“Really? How did you meet?” Renee finally took a sip of her drink.

 

How the hell did one explain that? I decided to fudge it a little bit. “It was kind of random happenstance, I guess. We just happened to meet, then we had coffee … and now we’re on our third date.”

 

“Shit, that’s more dates than you’ve been on in the past … how many years?” Steph asked.

 

Renee chuckled. “Don’t remind us, Steph.”

 

“Hey!”

 

They both laughed at my expense. “No offense, hun,” Steph began, “it’s just … you’re like the poster child for singlehood. You haven’t even been _interested_ in anyone for _years_. So, who is it? What’s his name? Or _her_ name?”

 

I rolled my eyes. “His name is Chuck.”

 

“Chuck? Just Chuck?” Renee asked.

 

“And what does this Chuck do?” Steph asked, sipping on her martini.

 

I was starting to feel grateful that we had spent our last date mostly in idle chit chat, because he had indulged some details about his life on earth that would make this q&a session just a little easier. “Chuck Shurley, and he’s a writer.”

 

“A writer? Really? Never knew you went for the artistic type,” Steph commented.

 

Renee snorted. “Let’s be real, we didn’t know _what_ type she goes for because she’s never gone for a type in so long.”

 

Steph ignored Renee and continued on asking questions. “So what does he write?”

 

“Books. He’s written a series under a pseudonym.”

 

“Anything I’d know?”

 

“Maybe? It’s the Supernatural series.”

 

Renee almost choked on her drink. “Are you serious? You’re dating Carver Edlund?”

 

“I take it you’ve heard of it, then.”

 

“Uh, yeah, the one with the hot brothers with the daddy issues and the drama and all the supernatural mysteries? It’s kind of a niche market but in that market, it’s _huge_.”

 

Steph tapped her lip with her finger for a moment. “Have I read them? They sound familiar …”

 

“You better have, I lent them to you!” Renee exclaimed. “Remember? Sam and Dean, and the angel Castiel …”

 

“Right, I remember now.” Steph turned back to me. “That’s gotta be an interesting relationship.”

 

I chuckled. _You don’t even know the half of it._ “Yeah, you could say that, again.”

 

“So, is it serious?” Renee asked.

 

I opened my mouth to reply, but nothing initially came out. I ended up shrugging and going with, “I’m not sure.”

 

Steph rolled her eyes. “C’mon, Kiz, you haven’t dated or shown interest in anyone in years, for you three dates is practically a marriage.”

 

I glared at her, but deep down, I had a feeling she was on the right track. Despite my initial misgivings and resistance, there was a core of emotion that felt good whenever I was around him, that made me want to spend more time with him. At times, when we were together, it felt intense, and that scared me. But afterward, it only made me crave him more. I felt like I was going crazy with how I was feeling and I didn’t even know why.

 

Steph’s eyes widened. “Oh my god, Kizzy, you really do like him, don’t you?”

 

“She doesn’t just like him,” Renee interjected. “She _loves_ him. It’s obvious.”

 

Was it? Did I really feel that way about him? It seemed impossible to feel that way about somebody I practically just met. Even the thought of _liking_ someone like that made me want to run. That feeling of being trapped was an old instinct of mine, one little leftover from the cult. Relationships always meant marriage, which meant I was doomed to a life of popping out kids one right after the other while attending to whatever whim my husband wanted. But this … this was fundamentally different than any other relationship I’d even attempted. Granted, we didn’t start off that great, but since we’d reached an understanding at that coffee shop … I couldn’t really put it into words, but it just felt different.

 

At my lack of response, Steph laid her hand on my leg. “Look, I know you’re all Miss Independent, but you can’t deny you feel _something_. And if this _is_ something … don’t let your hangups make you miss out on something good just because you’re afraid. You gotta take a chance sometimes.”

 

I sighed. Steph was right, of course. My scarred subconscious was trying so hard to resist to protect me from heartache that it was refusing to let me think objectively about how I felt. But just this small talk with my friends, it made me think that maybe, just maybe … I really did feel the “l” word. I still felt confused and a little conflicted, and maybe it was just the alcohol but I was feeling like it was just enough to push past that little resistance in my head and I realized … _Holy shit …_

 

Renee interrupted my train of thought as she grabbed both of us. “Alright, enough heavy stuff, let’s get a refill and go back to dancing!”

 

We ended up ended up alternating between drinks and dancing for the next several hours, throwing all our cares to the wind as we let loose and let the night take us. We didn’t dwell on anything more than superficial issues, like whose turn it was to buy a round or our individual level of buzz. It was a very successful night out, and we all decided to wait out front for our cabs so we could go home.

 

“So,” Steph asked as she lit up a cigarette outside, “you guys wanna meet up for brunch here tomorrow?”

 

The brunches at Lush were legendary, and the bottomless mimosas fabulous, but I wasn’t going to risk cutting it close to my date with Chuck. “Sorry, but I have a … a thing tomorrow. With Chuck.”

 

“Right, date number three,” Steph replied. “Renee, you up for it?”

 

“I’m always up for bottomless mimosas.”

 

I chuckled. Renee was the real lush of the group, so it was pretty much a given that if alcohol was involved, she was down for it. She was one of those people that Lush dreaded coming in and taking advantage of the bottomless mimosas because she damn well got her money’s worth. She called it being economical, I called it being a daytime drunk. But hey, she never went alone and always took a cab, so at least she was responsible about it. While Renee and Steph were deciding on an appropriate time to get together, my cab arrived, so I gave them both a hug goodbye and got in, giving the driver my address.

 

I rolled down the window just a taste, just enough to get a nice cold breeze on my face. I was still fairly drunk, and as a result I felt insanely warm, warm enough that I shed my coat in the car just so I didn’t feel like I was overheating. Once he dropped me off, I gave him a generous tip and made my way into my apartment building, almost forgetting to unlock the front door before I pulled on it. _Whoops_ , I giggled to myself as I waited for the elevator, twirling my coat in my arms. Despite the somewhat heavy things that weighed on my mind, I felt lighter than air. It was definitely a good decision to go have a girl’s night tonight, without knowing it they had both really helped me with my state of mind. Now, I still had some issues I had to sort through, but right now … right now I felt that I could really do it. That I could conquer my hangups and have everything. It felt truly _attainable_. And with that confidence, I actually felt some relief.

 

As I stood outside my door, drunkenly fumbling with my keys, I heard someone call my name. I turned around, confused as to why my neighbors would be trying to accost me at this hour, but I barely had the chance to take in the sight of a woman dressed in a dark oatmeal coloured wool coat before she raised her fingers to my forehead and everything went black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all knew it wasn't going to be that easy, right? ;)


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, back to Chuck's POV for this chapter :)

To say Chuck was thrilled for their next outing was a bit of an understatement. The divine being practically vibrated with energy, both nervous and excited. There was a particular seaside town in Italy that he wanted to take her to, not only for dinner but to walk and roam and relax. In their previous date, she’d mentioned that she never traveled, figuring the logistics would take away from the enjoyment. But, when one had a divine being with them, there were no real logistics to worry about. No plane tickets to scour the internet for, no hotel to research and book, no running through airports desperately trying to make it to the required gate in time to make a connection. All that was required was to sit back and enjoy, and he thought Kiz could handle that. He hoped it would be a pleasant surprise for her, as he wanted her to see the world, see his creation, experience different things first hand. It was a part of what made a rich, fulfilling life for humans. Not necessarily the traveling bit, just the immersion into different cultures and experiences where one could. That could be found in places close to home, of course, but why not go to the extra mile if you could?

 

He dressed similarly to their first date, just a button up and a dark blazer, keeping it casual while still looking nice. Gabriel had given him a knowing wink, a subtle gesture that meant he was giving Chuck his vote of confidence. Gabe had known all along that the two of them would hit it off if they just gave it a chance, and Chuck had to thank the archangel for his part.

 

At precisely noon, Chuck appeared outside Kismet’s apartment, half-expecting to see her walking through the door with her incredible punctuality. He hadn’t pre-programmed that into her, that was just the quirkiness of humans … they tended to develop certain qualities during their life due to simple random circumstance. Angels did, too, though normally to a much lesser extent. There were always exceptions, however, like Gabriel and Castiel, and even Lucifer, though his was due to the Mark more than anything else.

 

It was curious, then, when not only was Kismet not leaving the building exactly at noon, but Chuck was still waiting all alone five minutes later.

 

This was rather odd, but he figured something must have unexpectedly come up that was causing her delay, a variable. That tended to happen sometimes. Strange that she didn’t at least give him a call so he had a head’s up … it was a part of her considerate and kind nature. Chuck checked the time, even though he knew good and well what time it was. He supposed he just wanted to confirm that he did indeed leave at the right time and, just as he knew, he had left precisely at noon. The same time he’d told Kismet to meet him. He gnawed at his lip, contemplating what this might mean. He pulled out his phone and dialed her number, but instead of ringing it went right to voicemail. That was even more concerning, and he started to get this bad feeling start to coil in the pit of his stomach. He contemplated what to do for a moment before he transported himself to her apartment door. He had considered going directly into her apartment, but in case she was there he didn’t want to make it seem like he was invading her privacy. As he raised his hand to knock on her door, however, he felt something underfoot, and when he looked down he swore he felt his heart stop.

 

Lying there, crumbled on the floor, was her coat. He recognized it from their first date, when she had worn it over a red number. He’d thought she looked gorgeous, but now the coat was simply a harbinger, a bad sign. He knelt and picked up her coat, hearing a thud and a jingle as her phone and keys fell out of it.

 

That settled it. Something was very, very wrong.

 

He did check the inside of her apartment, just to make sure, but it was empty, as he suspected it was. With her coat, phone, and keys in hand, Chuck went back to the bunker, suddenly finding it very hard to think straight. He had to focus, had to think, concentrate, come up with a way to find her. But his divine brain, in all its intricacies, was having a hard time doing just that. All he could think of was Kismet, wondering how she was, where she was, if she was safe and unhurt. He dreaded to think of worse. He tried not to think of worse. But despite his efforts, scenario after scenario was now playing through his head and that feeling in the pit of his stomach was starting to make him feel sick. She wasn’t dead, he knew that much, as he would have felt her soul cross over. That did bring him a small amount of reassurance, but at the same time it seemed to be of little comfort, as there was still a large difference “safe and well” and “not dead”. Chuck was so consumed by his worrying thoughts that he barely heard Gabriel speak to him.

 

“Dad? Dad? What are you doing back so soon?”

 

He looked up to see the archangel standing there, and he realized he’d transported himself into the library. Castiel and the Winchesters were sitting at one of the tables, but Gabriel had stood, presumably upon Chuck’s arrival. “There’s something wrong.”

 

“What do you mean? What’s wrong?” Dean asked, always eager to jump into something.

 

“She wasn’t there when I went to pick her up. I waited a few minutes and tried to call her but her phone went to voicemail. I can only assume it ran out of juice because it, her coat, and her keys were lying outside her empty apartment.”

 

“So, what … kidnapping, then?” the elder Winchester asked.

 

Chuck nodded, feeling his chest constrict at the thought of her in the hands of some unknown entity.

 

Sam spoke up next. “If you hadn’t found her things I would have wondered if she left, but obviously …” he gestured before he continued, “ … don’t worry, Chuck, we’ll work on getting her back.”

 

The Winchesters immediately went into business mode, Sam typing away on his laptop as he conferred with Dean. They requested her phone, and Chuck obliged, tapping it once to restore the power before he handed it over. He disliked invading her privacy, but there were more important things to worry about at the moment. He could always apologize to her _after_ she was safe and sound. And, knowing the Winchesters, they would find her. He just had to hope that it would be in time before something happened to her. Not that he couldn’t revive her and bring her back if he wanted to do - he was _God_ , after all - but he preferred to not have to do that. The thought of reviving her repulsed him, not because of the act of revival itself, but because he didn’t want to think about what she could have possibly gone through, suffered through, that was fatal. He knew all too well how fragile human bodies could be … he felt incredibly stupid, stupid that he hadn’t gone ahead and granted her the divine vessel that he had been planning to do. Of course, after the less than lukewarm reception he’d had upon their meeting, he’d put that on hold. Regret now filled him that he had put it off so long, not only granting her a vessel that would keep her unharmed but solidifying their link. Had he done so, he would have been able to sense her presence no matter where she was in the universe. He supposed he’d wanted to wait until they were closer, until she’d warmed up to him more, but his concerns about her and her reaction to that now paled in comparison to the thought of her being out there, somewhere, in the company of an unknown individual or individuals that wished her harm with no way to contact him.

 

Well, there _was_ one way … but given her history, he sincerely doubted she would be up to praying. Nonetheless, he tuned his ears to listen out for her, hoping that she would be desperate enough to offer up something that would help him pinpoint her.

 

In the meantime, he had to trust in the Winchesters and their specialized skills they’d honed over years of hunting. It didn’t take Sam long to get into her phone, and from there he started piecing together her footsteps to figure out where they should start looking. He’d figured out the club she’d gone to and even the taxi she’d taken home. Now it was time for a little field work, and the brothers suited up and grabbed their fake FBI IDs before their angels flew them where they needed to go. Chuck could have gone with them, had he chosen to do so, but he felt helpless enough in this situation, he didn’t want to be going anywhere where he wasn’t on point. So he bid them goodbye and then slowly made his way back to his room.

 

He removed his jacket as he entered, tossing it toward a chair and missing. He didn’t bother to pick it up, yet, instead lying back on the bed. It hadn’t been that long ago that he laid here and reminisced about a wonderful date in between planning the next one. He’d been so close, had made so much progress, but now he felt scared, like it was all being taken away from him and he didn’t know what to do. These feelings … they were all personally foreign to him. He had seen them before, watched them experienced by other beings, but to have them himself, to feel what it was like right in the thick of things … it was not exactly what he expected. It was wild and strange and a little overwhelming, but overall it felt good and right. Right now, though, the intensity of such feelings scared him, the fact that he could potentially lose her after doing so much to find her and reconcile with her … it instilled in him a fear that he’d never before had, not even when his angry sister was gunning for him with all intent of destroying him and everything he’d created. Worse, though, was the knowledge that, at least right now, there was nothing he could do. For all the power that was available to him, it was ultimately useless. _He_ was useless. And coming to terms with that was … rough, to say the least.

 

Chuck laid there for a while, wallowing in self-deprecation, not even moving when he heard the Winchesters and the angels return. If there was any big break, Gabriel would have relayed that to him immediately, but since he’d heard nothing, then it was doubtful that any information they gleaned was urgent. The archangel still sought him out, however, knocking twice on the door before entering. Even though he knew there wasn’t anything big to report on, he still asked, “So? Find out anything?”

 

Gabriel sighed. “Not a whole lot. The bartender at the club she was at said that no one seemed to be bothering her or her group of friends, which said friends confirmed as, surprise surprise, they were there. We reviewed the security tapes just to be sure and we didn’t see anything out of the ordinary. The cab driver was also clean and the security cameras outside her apartment building don’t show anyone suspicious coming or going, which means …”

 

“Whoever took her had the ability to teleport in and out to avoid detection.”

 

“Exactly, so …”

 

Chuck sighed. “Sounds like a demon.”

 

Gabriel nodded. “Strange, though, we didn’t smell any sulfur outside or inside her apartment.”

 

“So what? Our demon was obviously smart enough to use a different location in the building to teleport in and out so they wouldn’t be detected right away. By now any smell or trace of it would be gone.”

 

Gabriel gnawed at his lip. “We’re still looking, Dad, we’re not giving up yet. Sam and Dean have worked cases with a helluva lot less than this.”

 

“But have they always found the victims alive?” Gabriel didn’t respond, to which Chuck continued. “I think it’s time we brought in your older brothers.”

 

Gabe’s eyebrows almost shot off his forehead. “You mean …”

 

Chuck nodded. “Summon Lucifer and Michael.”

 

“Are you … are you sure that they won’t just end up fighting _each other_?”

 

“I’m sure. That extended vacation I took with Amara was a chance for all of us to reconcile. They’ll play nice.”

 

Gabriel still looked a little apprehensive, but acquiesced with a nod. This was going to be hell to explain to Sam and Dean, but what Chuck wanted he got, and he wanted the other archangels in on this. Maybe it was ultimately a little overkill, but Chuck didn’t care. All he cared about at the moment was getting her back in one piece.

 

As he closed his eyes for a moment, he couldn’t help but plead, _C’mon, Kiz, just pray to me, just once. Please._


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're back with Kismet for this chapter. It's a little on the short side, but I hope you enjoy it. :)

When I woke up next, my head was spinning, at about the same rotation as my stomach, it seemed. I groaned with the effort I expended just to turn over in bed, ignoring even the creak of the mattress beneath me. _I didn’t really drink that much, did I?_ I mentally tallied my drinks for the night and it seemed to hit in the average range for me, nothing that would explain this level of hangover.

 

And then I remembered.

 

I bolted upright in the bed, the action not the wisest I’d ever taken. The room spun and my stomach lurched, threatening to upend its contents, what little was still left in there. The last I had eaten was a few munchies at the bar. I’d been planning on heating up some leftovers when I got home, but, well … I never got through the door. That woman - who was she? - had accosted me before I had even been able to get my key in the lock. I couldn’t remember what happened after she lifted her hand. What the fuck had she done to me? Whatever it was, the after affects had me reeling. I had the sneaking suspicion that even if I hadn’t been drinking I would still feel like I’d been hit by a truck. I wanted nothing more than to lie back in bed and nap until the ill feeling passed, but the feeling of danger that lurked in the back of my mind settled at the base of my neck and made my hair feel like it was standing on end. I’d wager that I couldn’t have napped if my life depended on it.

 

I breathed through the welling nausea and the pounding headache as I scooted toward the edge of the mattress, taking in my current surroundings and keeping my ears open for any sounds. The room I was in was fairly small and extremely basic - the only furniture being the bed I was sitting on, the mattress having no sheet or blanket covering it - but there were two doors available. One sat off to my right, set slightly ajar, just enough so that I could see it was a bathroom. I might have need to avail myself of the facilities later, but for now I was more interested in figuring out where I was and what was going on. The other door was in front of me, closed tight, and I took a deep breath to quell the nervousness as I slowly and quietly slipped from my place on the bed to test the waters. The sound from my heels were softened by the thick shag carpet on the floor, and I winced as a floorboard creaked underfoot. I didn’t hear anything else, however, no footsteps or voices set off in response to me moving, so I continued forward slowly until I finally set my hand on the doorknob and went to turn it.

 

It didn’t turn, however. I jiggled it a couple of times to make sure, but nope, it was locked. I cursed under my breath as I stepped back from the door, assessing my current situation. I had been kidnapped by someone unknown, taken somewhere unknown, and locked away. Maybe if I knew how to pick locks then I might be able to do something, but I didn’t know shit about that kind of thing. Nope, I was pretty much stuck here. My eyes wandered over the bare room, resting on a window across the room. _Unless_ …

 

I glanced toward the door, like someone would appear if I showed any signs of trying to escape, but no one did and I quietly slipped toward the window.-I easily slipped the latches open, but the window itself wouldn’t budge … probably because it was painted shut. _Fuck_. Even if I could have opened it, it probably wouldn’t have done me much good as it looked like I was on the third story of a fairly remote rural house. I didn’t see any awnings underneath the window, and I wasn’t going to come out of a three story drop unscathed. And since we were out in what looked like the middle of nowhere, there was no one - besides my captor or captors - who would hear me call for help. It was like they had anticipated my every move and I was now stuck in a corner.

 

I slowly traced my steps back to the bed, sitting down on the side of it, not knowing what else to do. There wasn’t a clock in the room, and I must have dropped my phone when I was abducted as it was nowhere to be seen. My coat and keys were also missing, and I hoped that no one took the opportunity to avail themselves of the items in my apartment just because _I_ ended up fucked over. I didn’t even know who had taken me or why. I wasn’t really anyone important, just an executive assistant, not privy to any kind of juicy confidential information. I couldn’t fathom why anyone would want to grab me.

 

The house I was in was completely silent, no stray sounds of a radio or TV or any kind of conversation drifted through the place. With no entertainment of any kind, I quickly got bored, despite my position. I mean, sure, I’d been snatched by persons unknown and deposited in the house that time apparently forgot, but with naught but my thoughts to help pass the time, it was difficult to stay occupied. The bathroom at least had running water, so i was able to get something to drink and use the restroom - thank fuck for the old roll of one ply still sitting there - but other than that, there was nothing else to do. I seriously contemplated taking a bath, just for something to do, but I eventually dismissed the idea as there were no towels and since I didn’t even know who I was dealing with, I figured probably not a good idea to just impulsively put myself in an even more vulnerable position.

 

The sun was waning in the sky before I heard any hint of another living being in the house. I had been lying back on the bed, staring at the ceiling, when I heard the unmistakable sound of flapping wings. I sat up, a little dizzy as I hadn’t eaten anything since the previous day, my heart suddenly pounding out of my chest. I knew that sound, that sound always heralded Gabriel’s appearance. Had he come for me? I could only hope as I sat there, reminding myself to breathe as footsteps made their way up two separate sets of stairs and traversed a short hallway to stand outside the door. The suspense was killing me as I heard a key jiggling in the lock before the door swung open to reveal the same woman who had called out to me from outside my apartment. She still wore the long overcoat, and her dark blond hair was pulled back into a tight bun at the nape of her neck. She looked utterly unremarkable and ordinary in every way, except for this strange, cold energy that radiated off of her that made me want to shiver. I suppressed the urge for now, but I couldn’t help the goosebumps that erupted along my bare arms at her piercing gaze.

 

Her face was mostly emotionless, but there was a small hint of contempt as she threw a bag of fast food at me, the smell of fried meat heavy in the air, turning my stomach again. “Here. Sustenance.”

 

“I-I can’t eat this. Meat makes me sick,” I stammered. I hadn’t eaten meat in years, much less cheap stuff like this. It was asking for gastrointestinal trouble.

 

“Then eat the fries. Or nothing at all. I don’t care.”

 

She turned to leave when I screwed up the courage to ask, “Who are you?”

 

There was a pregnant pause before she finally replied, “My name is Barachiel.”

 

“Barachiel? What do you want with me?”

 

She barely chuckled under her breath as she said, “I don’t want anything to do with you. What I want, what I have only ever wanted … is _him_.”

 

“Him?” I was genuinely confused, and also really hoping she wasn’t talking about my boss because hoo boy would _that_ ever be awkward to explain that he played for the other team …

 

“Don’t be stupid, I’ve seen you with him, out and about. Coffee shops, out to dinner, even a little road trip. It’s positively _disgusting_.”

 

“Wait, you mean _Chuck_?”

 

She grinned, but it was not in a friendly way by any stretch of the imagination. “Oh is that what he’s calling himself these days? You must forgive me, I knew him from before, from when his name was incomprehensible to humans. When he personally ran heaven and ruled over earth. I was the one who guarded his throne.”

 

“You’re an … an angel?”

 

“And what else would I be?” she replied, bitterness seeping out in her tone. “Seraphim, servant of God, it’s all I’ve ever been since I was created along with my brothers and sisters. I’m not some special _human_ , hand carved by the Almighty.”

 

“Then what do you want with me?”

 

“The one thing I’ve been denied for so long … recognition.” She didn’t give me a chance to say anything else as she slammed the door shut and locked it behind her. I heard her footsteps descend through the house, and I laid back on the bed for a moment, breathing heavily, trying to suppress the sobs that were threatening to overtake me. At least now I knew who had taken me, but it wasn’t really of any comfort. Kidnapped by a freaking angel, of all things, and why? Because I was with Chuck? _Oh my god are they … jealous?_ At least they seemed somewhat concerned that I was kept alive for now, but Barachiel had given no hint as to any kind of a long term plan. Who knew what the end goal was here. Maybe I was just supposed to be a lamb offered up for slaughter.

 

The sun eventually set, and I dragged myself out of my internal pity party to scarf down the cold fries. Not really a meal, but it was something, and I mechanically chewed and swallowed the food between tears. I didn’t dare touch the burger, but I drank extra water to help my stomach feel full. Despite that, it still grumbled in protest as I laid down on the bed, the full moon high in the sky, the only source of light in the room. I tossed and turned, trying to get comfortable, but I just couldn’t find any rest, the stress and worry of everything that had happened to me in the last 24 hours or so looming in the back of my mind, the uncertainty of what would happen haunting my waking moments and refusing me any kind of respite in slumber. It wasn’t until the sun started peeking out over the horizon that I finally did something that I hadn’t done in years, that I never thought I would ever do again.

 

I prayed.

 

I didn’t kneel or fold my hands or anything, but I did close my eyes as I took a deep breath, feeling silly but not knowing what else to do. _Chuck, I … I hope you can hear me-fuck, what am I doing this is so stupid-um … I don’t know if you can hear me, but I hope you can. I’m sorry I’ve up and disappeared, but it wasn’t by choice. I was taken by this angel named Barachiel. Can you hear me? Chuck? Please tell me you can hear me. Fuck, for once in my life please hear me. I’m scared and I don’t know what to do. I need you. Please._

 

After my little prayer, I actually did feel a little better. Like a feeling a relief filled me and I was finally able to drift into sleep. Not the kind of deep, restful sleep that I really needed, but a little deeper than dozing, just enough to recoup. It was all I was going to get for the moment, and I took it.


	14. Chapter 14

It had not been a very good night for Chuck. Sometimes he slept, not because he needed to but just because sleeping was _nice_. But the night before had been spent tossing and turning and struggling against a burgeoning existential crisis. Just what kind of divine being was he if he could find the one person he _needed_? For all the power coursing through him, he was utterly useless. It was not a comfortable realization to come to.

 

As a result, the next morning, he poured himself a generous cup of coffee. It wasn’t but maybe 5am, but he wasn’t even going to try to sleep anymore. Gabriel and Castiel were off with their humans in their respective rooms, but Michael and Lucifer were standing around in the kitchen, discussing what their next move should be. Chuck admitted, it was nice to see his children getting along, no matter how strange it must have seemed to the Winchesters. Chuck had constructed special vessels for them, much like he had done for Castiel once upon a time, so they weren’t possessing humans.Michael’s vessel was the younger John Winchester that he had possessed once upon a time, and while it had been brief, he’d expressed it was one of his favourite vessels. Lucifer, on the other hand, stuck to Nick, the man he’d originally possessed the first time he’d been released from the cage. They nodded in greeting as he’d entered the kitchen and kept to their whispers, probably discussing things they didn’t really want their Father to hear. Dark things, potential fates that Kismet had met. _Something just has to give,_ he thought as he took a sip from the large mug.

 

And give something did, as at that moment, a familiar voice burst through his head with such clarity, Chuck seized for a moment and went completely still. _Chuck, I … I hope you can hear me-fuck, what am I doing this is so stupid-um … I don’t know if you can hear me, but I hope you can. I’m sorry I’ve up and disappeared, but it wasn’t by choice. I was taken by this angel named Barachiel. Can you hear me? Chuck? Please tell me you can hear me. Fuck, for once in my life please hear me. I’m scared and I don’t know what to do. I need you. Please._ The heart of Chuck’s vessel started hammering hard against his chest, his eyes widened as he processed what he’d heard.

 

The two archangels in the room had noticed the way he had suddenly stilled, his coffee cup halfway to the counter, and Michael asked, “Father?”

 

“She did it,” Chuck said, almost in disbelief. He knew her background and while he’d been hoping she’d reach out in prayer, he’d thought it highly unlikely. But she had taken that step of faith and he felt overwhelmed at the trust that she’d placed in him just now.

 

“Did what?” Michael asked.

 

“She prayed to me, just now.”

 

“Well at least we know she’s alive,” Lucifer said. “What did she say?”

 

“She’s being held by an angel.”

 

“ _What_?” both archangels exclaimed in disbelief.

 

Chuck nodded, a hint of a smirk on his face. “She’s given us a start. Barachiel.”

 

“I’ll see what I can find out about them,” Michael said, fluffing his wings before he took off for heaven.

 

Chuck took another sip of his coffee before asking, partly to himself, “What would an _angel_ want with her?”

 

Lucifer shrugged. “At least we know she’s alive. She’s out there. And we’ll find her.”

 

When the brothers and their respective angels stumbled into the kitchen at almost the same time a couple of hours later, they were a bit wary of the eerily familiar figure leaning against the wall. Lucifer waved but otherwise didn’t antagonize them. Their wariness was perfectly understandable, after all, given the past several hundred or so centuries, give or take. Though they had protested, they had eventually relented to calling the elder archangels, trusting Chuck that they would play nice, and so far so good. Granted it hadn’t been that long since they’d been summoned, but still they seemed content to adopt a wait and see attitude for the time being. Sam, especially, however, was more protective of Gabriel, considering that the last time Lucifer had met Gabriel he had killed his younger brother. Sam had never quite gotten over the sight of seeing Gabriel’s vessel lying there, his wings burned into the floor. Chuck had done what he could to soothe over the edges of hurt, but they still throbbed a little when they were tugged.

 

Chuck took the opportunity to clue them in as to the recent developments. He was on his third cup of coffee already, anxiously awaiting Michael’s return with news, and he had to slow himself down before he started talking a mile a minute. Gabriel nodded and chuckled softly as he said, “Well, that explains why we can’t just find her the way we normally could … Barachiel probably has the place warded to The Empty and back.”

 

“Can you ward against … uh, Chuck?” Sam asked, sipping on his own cup of coffee.

 

“Of course you can! You can ward against just about anything, it just depends on your knowledge and level of ability. It’s difficult to ward against a divine being like that, but it’s not impossible. A human, for example, couldn’t do it. But an angel, definitely, they’d have the juice for it.”

 

Dean shook his head as he raised his mug to his lips, not about to contemplate warding against the Almighty when a flutter of wings preceded Michael’s arrival. Dean eyed the odd visage of his younger father while Chuck turned to him, eager for news. “Well?”

 

Michael shook his head. “This goes much further than I originally thought. It took me a while, and quite a bit of digging, but I found something you might be interested in seeing,” he said as he held out a small, plain looking manilla folder to Chuck.

 

“What’s this?” Chuck asked as he took the folder and opened it, his eyes scanning the pages as Michael continued.

 

“The missing records from Kismet’s birth. The originals were destroyed, but I managed to find the backups. They had been hidden, intentionally. Samandriel had to help me find them.”

 

“Samandriel?” Dean asked. “I thought …”

 

“I raised him, shortly before I came back to Earth to find Kiz,” Chuck replied quickly, his eyes still on the papers in his hand. “Does this mean …?” he asked Michael, his voice trailing off.

 

“Kismet wasn’t born by mistake, Barachiel was the one who took her soul and facilitated its birth before destroying the original records. It looks like they wanted to erase her existence.”

 

“But … why?” Chuck asked, finally looking up from the folder. “Why would they do this?”

 

The kitchen was silent and tense for a moment until Lucifer cleared his throat. “Well, uh, I hate to say it, but, uh, you did tend to rub people the wrong way for a while, there …” He held up his hands defensively as he added, “No offense or anything, but it’s true.”

 

“But why _her_? Why _now_?”

 

“Barachiel probably thought you’d never find her,” Castiel posited. “When you did, and they found out …”

 

Chuck sighed, closing his eyes and rubbing his face. “I made her a target. Fuck.” Running his hands through his hair, he mumbled, “I didn’t know, I just didn’t know … if I’d had any inkling at all that her birth was intentional, that the loss of records wasn’t an accident …”

 

Gabriel settled a hand on his shoulder. “You didn’t know, that’s not your fault.”

 

He shook his head. “I should have looked harder into why the records were missing, into why she had been allowed to be born. I was just so focused on _finding_ her, that I …”

 

“ _Dad_ ,” Gabriel said, a little more firmly. “Let’s just focus on finding her, yeah?”

 

Michael interjected. “But if Barachiel is warding this extensively, how are we going to find her? Where do we even start?”

 

As if on cue, a rather familiar accented voice intoned, “Hello boys.”

 

They all turned and Sam nearly choked on his coffee as Dean sputtered, “ _Crowley_?”

 

The King of Hell eyed Lucifer for a moment before he turned toward Chuck and the brothers as he said, “There’s a rumour goin’ ‘round that you’ve lost something.”

 

“And what do you know?” Dean asked.

 

“Well, I might happen to know who has her.”

 

“Barachiel, the seraphim,” Michael replied. “We already know.”

 

“Fair enough. I might also know where she’s being held.”

 

“Bullshit,” Dean spat. “Why would you of all people know?”

 

“Because Barachiel was trying to pawn her off on me.” Crowley reached inside his coat and drew his phone out of his pocket, unlocking it and scrolling through it until he found what he was looking for and held it up for them to see. “Look familiar?” he asked.

 

Chuck felt his blood run cold as it was clearly a picture of Kismet, her hair tangled and her makeup smeared, gagged and tied to a chair. He had to clench his hands into fists to keep them from shaking and he set his jaw, his voice low as he asked, “Where is she?”

 

“Little house in the middle of nowhere in Arkansas. A house that just to happens to be warded against almost every fucking thing in creation.” Crowley stopped to smirk as he added, “Except for me, of course.”

 

“Wait, why is Barachiel wanting to 'pawn' Kismet off on you, as you say?” Castiel asked, his eyes narrowing as he was processing everything the demon was saying.

 

“Wouldn’t go into details much with me, not without some sort of confirmation I was interested. I snapped the picture and told them I’d get back to them after I confirmed a few things.”

 

“And you immediately came here, did you?” Dean asked sarcastically, the tone of his voice suggesting he wasn’t quite buying everything Crowley was selling.

 

Crowley lifted his hand over his chest, feigning hurt. “Squirrel, you wound me.”

 

“Dean has a point,” Lucifer said, pushing himself off the wall he’d been leaning on and circling towards his former rival. “You are a rather wiggly one, Crowley. How do we know you’re not just trying to throw us off their trail?”

 

“Because I know where to hedge my bets, and that is with the Winchesters … and whoever happens to be on their side. Which would mean you,” he said as he turned toward Chuck. “So, you going to let me help you get back your lady love?”

 

Chuck sighed, considering the fact that, should this not pan out, he could always smite Crowley out of existence. He was sure Crowley was aware of that fact as well, and so he decided to mirror Kismet’s act of faith and take a leap, himself. “Alright, let’s do this. But so help me, if you fuck me over, if any harm comes to her …”

 

“Don’t worry about your little sweetheart,” the King of Hell assured. “Despite the picture, she seems adequately looked after for the time being. I’ve bought us a little time for ‘research’ but we will still need to move quickly before Barachiel moves on to wooing someone else.”

 

Chuck nodded. “Then let’s get started.”


	15. Chapter 15

I had finally settled into a troubled sleep when I was rudely awakened from it. I just barely processed the door unlocking and opening before a strong hand grabbed my shoulder and pulled me to my feet. I stumbled over my feet as I was dragged out of the room, blinking as I wasn’t fully awake yet. Barachiel didn’t seem to care as they dragged me out of the room and down two flights of stairs and into what looked to be a living room, thought it was pretty bare. No sofa or loveseat or lazy boy chair was to be seen, only a couple of standard wooden dining room chairs. The angel shoved me into a chair, and I almost fell off, but I was suddenly pulled back on, though it wasn’t by hands. Ropes had appeared out of seemingly nowhere and had wrapped around my arms and torso and tied me to the chair. “What the fuck?” I yelled as I struggled uselessly against them.

 

“Be quiet,” Barachiel said coldly. “He should be here any minute.”

 

I didn’t even get a chance to ask who, as a man in a black suit suddenly appeared out of the ether. _Is he another angel?_ I wondered, though I hadn’t heard the typical flapping of wings that normally accompanied an angel appearing.

 

Barachiel seemed to know exactly who he was. “Crowley.”

 

He smirked. “And to what do I owe the pleasure, Barachiel?”

 

“I wish to discuss the selling of this woman, here.”

 

“Hey!” I protested.

 

“I said _silence_ , you insolent whore,” the angel hissed at me.

 

This Crowley watched our exchange with narrowed eyes, surveying the situation. “And just why would I want her? She looks like any other normal human. Nothing special.”

 

“But she _isn’t_ just a normal human,” Barachiel insisted. “This human was specially designed by Father, himself. She is his soulmate.”

 

Crowley looked a little confused. “You want to sell God’s soulmate to the King of Hell? Why?”

 

“My reasons are my own. Are you interested or not?”

 

The King of Hell regarded me carefully, circling around me before finally leaning over to look me in the eye. “Fancy a new master, poppet?”

 

My nose wrinkled in disgust as I spat at him. “Screw you!”

 

Immediately after I spoke, a gag appeared out of nowhere, stuffing my mouth full of cloth before wrapping around my head to keep it in place. I glared at the angel out of the corner of my eye, for all the good it did me. “I warned you,” they intoned, turning to Crowley to ask, “So? What do you think?”

 

Crowley wiped the spit off his face and straightened up, pulling out his phone. “I need to do a little research, confirm a few things before we talk price.” The flash suddenly went off and I realized that he’d taken a picture of me.

 

“Of course. Don’t take too long, though, there are other buyers whom I”m sure would be interested.”

 

“You’ll hear from me by tonight,” he promised, winking at me before he disappeared just as quickly and silently as he had appeared. My heart sank as my bonds and gag finally disappeared and Barachiel hauled me up to my feet and took me back up to my room, unceremoniously shoving me inside before locking the door.

 

The weight of the situation fully sunk in as I heard the angel’s retreating footsteps, and I crawled up onto the bed and laid down on it, pulling a small pillow to my chest and crying as quietly as I could. I was being sold. Sold into what, I wasn’t sure, and I didn’t even want to think about it. If Crowley was the King of Hell, did that mean he was a demon, then? I shuddered to think what a demon could do to a person. I didn’t really know shit about them, but the connotations behind their name was enough to send a chill down my spine. Images of dark, dank dungeons filled with screams and blood flitted through my mind, and I hugged the pillow just a little closer in fear. Had my prayer not worked, then? Did Chuck not hear me? I didn’t know what to think as I curled into a little ball in the middle of the bed, my only option to wait this out and see what would happen. Maybe, if I was sold, I would get a chance to escape. That was my only hope, and I clung to it as I tried valiantly to get some sleep. Slumber eluded me, however, as I tossed and turned, worry overtaking my mind and pushing away the one thing that I needed and could actually accomplish in this situation. What I really needed … well, I could definitely use a shower and something to eat. And, at the moment … I found myself really wanting Chuck. I wasn’t sure if it was just for the comfort or if it was something else, but more than anything I wanted him with me.

 

I didn’t see hide nor hair of Barachiel until sometime in the late morning or early afternoon, I guessed, since the sun was shining bright overhead. They said nothing to me, simply tossed a bag of fast food at me and left. Once again, they’d made no attempt to accommodate a vegetarian diet, though at least the fries were a large size. I scarfed them down and then drank some water from the faucet, leaving the bag on the floor near the bathroom. There wasn’t a waste basket in sight, unfortunately, but depending on how long I would remain here, I could use the leftover napkins. Part of me hoped I would be leaving this damn house soon, though another part of me wanted to stay put until Chuck found me. If he found me. Whatever the case, I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, attempting to calm myself enough to rest so that if an opportunity presented itself, I could take advantage of it. Despite my best efforts, however, I only managed some light dozing. Better than nothing, but not quite what I needed. I only ended up giving myself a headache by the time Barachiel barged into my room again.

 

I jumped slightly as the door banged open, but I didn’t even get a chance to get a question out before the angel grabbed me by the shoulder and once more dragged me down the stairs. “Ow, hey, watch it!” I protested, pulling back slightly. Their grip felt like it was crushing my arm, and I was sure that there were going to be bruises left once I was finally let go. Barachiel didn’t care, they just dragged me behind them until we were back in the same living room. This time, they didn’t bother with shoving me in the chair, but they did keep their bruising grip on my arm. I tapped the heel of my shoe nervously against the floor, any sound muffled by the shag carpet, adrenaline coursing through my body as we waited there, anxiously. I wasn’t sure what to expect, if it would be the same Crowley or if there was another buyer she was meeting, but whatever it was I wanted it to hurry up and happen already.

 

It felt like we were waiting there forever, but it was probably only a few minutes before the strange man named Crowley reappeared, same as before, with a sly smile on his face. “So, have you decided?” the angel asked him.

 

“Yes. I’ll take her.”

 

My heart leapt into my throat and I swallowed hard to try to keep calm. Barachiel didn’t seem to notice as they announced, “Good. My asking price is 10,000 souls.”

 

Crowley chuckled. “You really think you’ll get that much for one person? 200 is more like it.”

 

The angel scoffed. “I didn’t bring you here to insult me. She’s _worth_ more. I’m only _asking_ for 10,000.”

 

“Just because you’re asking, love, doesn’t mean you’re going to get it. I’ll up it to 500, but that’s all.”

 

Barachiel outright laughed at the offer and I began to get very nervous standing there. I didn’t know which was worse, watching yourself get auctioned off or waiting elsewhere knowing it was happening. “You do understand who she is, don’t you? The soulmate of The Almighty, himself. Her vessel was hand-carved by Father himself. Her soul is meant for divinity.”

 

“Meant for it, maybe, but it’s not divine now. And I’d wager there’s only one person who can make it so and I don’t think he’d be too happy of me asking. There’s a difference between a unique collectable and something that has been customized beyond all value.” He paused, his eyes roaming around the room for a moment before he offered, “1,000 souls, and not one more.”

 

The angel beside me sighed deeply as they considered their options. My heart was alternating between going a hundred miles a minute and stopping completely, or so it felt like. The air was tense and I swore if I’d had more on my stomach I’d have emptied its contents on the floor by now. My eyes darted between the angel beside me and the King of Hell in front of me, unsure which fate was worse, unable to decide what course of action I wanted to happen. I could only stand there and wait until one or the other broke. Barachiel eventually returned Crowley’s gaze and simply said, “Deal.”

 

Crowley nodded, smiling dangerously. “Good, good.” He motioned with his hand. “You’ll get every one as soon as I have my hands on her.”

 

The angel let me go, almost causing me to stumble from the loss of grip. They shot a cold look at me that told me, _You better go to him or else_. There was no use arguing, so I started across the gap that separated us when all of a sudden there was the sound of a large crack, like the foundation itself had split. Barachiel lunged at me and snatched me up again as they demanded, “What was that? What did you do?”

 

The King of Hell winced, shooting me a glance as he said, “Sorry, dear. On to plan b.” And just like that, once again, he vanished into thin air.

 

I barely got a chance to think, _What the hell is plan b?_ when the earth beneath us felt like it was rumbling. I started hearing a high pitched whine and screeching noise as an unidentifiable bright light kept getting brighter and brighter until I had to shut my eyes and bury my face in the crook of my elbow. The light apparently didn’t affect the angel beside me, as I felt them yank me and pull me in close to their chest, holding me there so tightly I could barely breathe. That had dislodged my face from my arm, but I could sense that the light had receded, and so I carefully opened my eyes to see two unknown men standing there, one blond, one brunette, along with Gabriel. They all looked extremely angry, but I couldn’t for the life of me place the other two, if I had met them or even seen them at all.

 

They didn’t look familiar, but Barachiel seemed to know them as they held up a silver looking knife to my face and said, “Come any closer, and I kill her.”

 

“Let her go, Barachiel,” the brunette said, taking a step closer, but the angel that held me only crushed me tighter in their grip and took a step back.

 

“I mean it. Unless you want to be picking your precious mommy’s brains off the floor, you’ll stay put.”

 

“It’s over,” the brunette insisted, not taking a step forward again, but their tone suggesting that further drawing this out was useless.

 

“No! It’s not over! I’m so close … I’ve stolen enough souls from heaven to power myself up to match you three, I just need a little more to push me over the edge and to match _him_.”

 

“And you’re not going to get it,” Gabriel spoke up. “Your last option weaseled out, so here we are.”

 

“Yes. But I’m still holding all the cards,” Barachiel replied, gripping me even tighter. I was starting to get light-headed from not being able to breathe well, but it didn’t seem the angel gave a shit. “None of you can stop me, not Gabriel, not Michael, and especially not Lucifer.” Barachiel chuckled as they asked, “And how long have you been out of the cage, eh? They keeping you on a leash? Are you being a good little archangel?”

 

The blond I hadn’t recognized sneered. “Oh that’s all in the past now. Bygones be bygones and such. I’m back with my _family_. Where I belong. Where _you_ belong …” he cocked his head ever so slightly “… but if I recall correctly, you shouldn’t have even been in heaven this whole time.” The knife dug a little into my skin as Lucifer continued, “I remember when I rebelled, you conspired with me. But when it came down to it, you tucked tail and ran and left me to my fate, quietly going back to your little guard duty at the throne. Tell me, who was on a leash again?”

 

“Silence!” Barachiel demanded, swiping the knife down my cheek and cutting it open. All three archangels jumped slightly at the action, but didn’t move just yet as I felt the knife reposition its tip against my neck.

 

Lucifer’s eyes flashed as he gritted his teeth and boldly took a step forward. “You always were a coward, Barachiel. You were then and you are now, hiding behind a human, using her as your shield while you try to figure out how you’re going to weasel out of this. You know you can’t run, all of your sigils and wards are down, courtesy of the brothers Winchester. The moment you take off we’ll be on your heels and there’ll be no stopping us. I’ll give you one chance to hand over my mother, and we’ll leave your fate up to Father. Resist …” his cold sneer sent a shiver down my spine, “… and I’ll take you apart, myself.”

 

The tip of the knife pressed a little harder into my neck, just enough to draw a little blood. “You don’t scare me, Lucifer,” Barachiel replied.

 

Lucifer shrugged, almost nonchalantly as he sighed. “Very well, have it your way. Oh Cassie …”

 

Barachiel cried out and dropped the knife, their grip loosening to the point when I dropped to my knees on the floor. The other familiar angel had materialized right beside my captor and had plunged his own knife in their arm, the same arm that held the knife, so Barachiel would be immobilized and couldn’t harm me. _Brilliant, I’ll give it that_. Everything else happened in such a blur, there was shouting and that high-pitched, shrill whine started up again, along with the light. But before I could even get a chance to close my eyes, Lucifer had scooped me up and once again I was sent through a swirling darkness filled with flapping wings.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part of this was actually supposed to go in the last chapter, but it started getting too long so I had to cut it and since I had a good bit written, I finished it out and decided to post it. I hope you enjoy!

When we finally materialized, we were in a cozy looking room that I didn’t recognize. No windows anywhere, but plenty of books scattered all over the place, shoved into bookshelves, set on top of tables, squeezed into corners. A decently sized bed with a heavy looking quilt was settled in the middle of the room, a familiar sweater thrown over it. I pulled myself out of Lucifer’s arms, looking around as I asked, “W-Where are we?”

 

“We’re in the bunker, in Chuck’s room.”

 

_Chuck!_ “Where is he?”

 

“Taking care of Barachiel.”

 

My brows furrowed. “I didn’t see him there …”

 

Lucifer smirked. “He was incoming. Without his vessel, too, so I had to get you out of there.” He stepped a little closer to me and held up his hand. “Here, let me.”

 

I wasn’t sure what he was talking about at first, but then his fingers caressed my cheek where I’d been cut and I felt a warm, tingling sensation sweep over me as I felt almost like I was going outside of my body for a second. It was the same sensation I’d felt when Chuck healed my eyesight and I realized it was because Lucifer was healing the wounds I’d sustained. In just a split-second it was over, and I reached up to feel my cheek, which was now back to being smooth and undamaged, just like before Barachiel had cut me. The slight puncture on my neck was also gone, as was the bruises on my arm from being gripped so tightly. “Thank you,” I breathed, still a little in awe that healing like that was real.

 

“Of course,” he replied. “Chuck should be back pretty soon, do you need anything?”

 

Need anything? Shit, I needed so much right now, but there was one thing I would settle for. “I really need a shower,” I said with a chuckle and a sigh.

 

“Well lucky for you, this is one of the few rooms with a private bathroom,” he said as he gestured, walking over to the corner of the room where a door was slightly cracked open. I followed as Lucifer opened the door further and turned on the light, revealing a nicely-sized bathroom. And when I say nicely-sized, I mean it rivaled the size of my own bathroom a bit. The floor area wasn’t as much, but that was because the shower was extra large. Lucifer took two steps and bent over to open the cabinet under the sink, pulling something out before making his way back to me where I stood in the door. “Here,” he said, handing me a towel. “Take as long as you want, there’s plenty of hot water. Anything else?”

 

I shook my head. “Thanks.” He nodded, scooting past me and out the door. I turned to go into the bathroom but paused, turning back for a moment and called to the retreating archangel. “Lucifer?”

 

“Yes?”

 

I pursed my lips for a moment, formulating what I was going to ask. “Earlier, in the house, you called me ‘mother’ … why?”

 

He grinned softly as he replied, “Well, Father didn’t just make you for him, though that was a large part of it. He made you for all of us, all the angels. You may not have made us with him, but to us, you’re still our mother.”

 

To say the revelation floored me would not be an understatement. I nodded slowly as I processed the information and then chuckled softly. “Funny, I never wanted to have children of my own, just never had that drive … but I was never opposed to being with someone who had children already.” I chuckled again as I added, “I guess I didn’t consider that this relationship comes with a _lot_ of built in children. Though, I guess not all of them are excited about it …”

 

I hadn’t realized it, but Lucifer had drawn near to me again. He gently alighted a hand on my shoulder as he said, “Barachiel was the exception, not the rule. I know most of the angels will be more than happy to have you, if that’s what you want. But, at the same time, don’t let it pressure you, alright? Don’t force your connection, let it develop naturally. We’ve been around for millennia, we can wait as long as you need.” And with that, he let his hand drop from my shoulder and walked out of the room, leaving me alone with my thoughts and my emotions that were currently roiling around inside me.

 

_Well, never thought I’d be getting relationship advice from Lucifer_ , was all I could think as I closed the bathroom door and set the towel on the counter, turning the water on to heat up while I stripped out of my clothes. It was already and hot steaming by the time I got my zipper all the way undone, and I quickly let the dress drop to the floor, followed by my undergarments before I slipped out of my heels. Carefully gathering everything and stuffing the unmentionables underneath my dress, I piled them in a corner and opened the shower door, taking a nice big breath of the steam before I stepped inside. I bit back a moan as the hot water coursed over me, working through my tense muscles and relaxing me. I just stood there for a few minutes, just drinking it in before I finally dunked my head under the water and wet my hair. I didn’t have a comb or brush with me, but I figured I could just use my fingers well enough. It was well worth it to go through the trouble for a proper full shower at this point. I hoped Chuck wouldn’t mind if I used a little bit of the products he had in there already as I lathered up and thoroughly washed my hair before leaving the conditioner in while I washed my body.

 

As I went to rinse the conditioner, it felt like a weight had fallen off of my shoulders. Tears started rolling down my cheeks just out of the sheer relief of finally being removed from that whole situation. Finally, _finally_! I had been afraid that I would never be able to return to my life, that I would be subjected to some harsh, cruel reality for the rest of my days. That or killed, that certainly did seem like a possibility for a time. But now I was free. I leaned against the wall of the shower for a moment as I shuddered through a few more sobs, then took some deep breaths as I re-centered myself. Between the heat from the shower and the relief rolling through me, I felt loose, almost boneless in the way that I sagged against the wall.

 

I was startled a little bit out of my reverie by a knock on the door. “Yes?” I called out, my head turning towards the door, even though I couldn’t see much of anything through the textured glass.

 

“Kiz, it’s me,” a familiar, comforting voice replied as the door was cracked open. “I have some things for you I think you’ll want after you get done. I’ll set them on the counter for you.”

 

“Okay,” I replied, watching the blurred outline of the door open and Chuck’s figure dip into the room quickly, just long enough to set a bundle on the counter near where I had set the towel before he dipped back out and closed the door. I wasn’t sure what he was talking about, what he’d left for me, but I lounged in the shower a little while longer, reveling in the feeling of being clean before I finally shut off the water and wrung out my hair a little before I opened the door just enough to grab the towel. Once I’d thoroughly dried myself off, I wrapped it around myself and gingerly stepped out of the shower. My skin was nice and red by that point, as I’d probably stayed in there a little too long, but with the level of clean I was feeling, it was worth it. No regrets.

 

It was then I could see what Chuck had brought in for me. A hairbrush sat on top of a bundle of what looked like clothes. _Sweet, I guess I won’t be wearing a dirty dress for the time being, then_. I couldn’t deny I was touched by the considerate action, even though it wasn’t much. It was the thought behind it, the fact he wanted it to be easier to detangle my hair and have something fresh and clean to lounge in until … well, I wasn’t really sure what was going to happen from here on. Could I go back to my apartment? My job? _Oh shit,_ I thought, realizing that I had missed work with no notification whatsoever. _Max is gonna kill me_. He may have been easy going as far as bosses went, but he fiercely believed in communication, and a no call no show was a very serious thing for him. Being late, not being able to come in to work, that was fine as long as I let him know in plenty of time so he could recruit someone to take over my tasks for the day. He wouldn’t fire me - at least, I hoped he wouldn’t - but I was going to be facing a pretty damn stern talking to. I sighed as I ran the brush through my hair, working out the tangles until it was left long and sleek. I reached for the pile of fresh clothes and realized that he’d included everything, down to a fresh pair of underwear and a bra. Sports bra, but hey, I wasn’t that big so it would be comfortable. For me it was the next best thing to going bra-less, something I would do all the time at home but also something I wouldn’t be so comfortable doing around a bunch of guys, most of whom I didn’t really know. While I had been in the shower, it had finally clicked that the “bunker” that Lucifer had referred to was indeed the same place where I had been taken to meet Chuck the first time. I wasn’t sure what kind of bunker it was, but if Chuck was here, it was safe, and that put me at ease.

 

I pulled on the thin grey sweats and loose blue t-shirt, running my fingers through my hair one last time before I hung the towel up on the rod and opened the bathroom door, letting the steam filter out into the room. To my surprise, the room wasn’t empty. Chuck stood next to the bed, hands in his pockets, looking like he was fidgeting anxiously. He had looked up when I opened the door, and when we locked eyes, for a moment we both just stood there, still. I was the first to break as I whispered, “Chuck.”

 

Throwing caution to the wind, I power walked over to him and flung my arms around him, burying my face in his chest. He immediately responded, wrapping his arms around me and squeezing softly. I felt him settle his cheek against my forehead as I couldn’t help the choked sobs that escaped. Being free and then seeing him, it was just an overload. A pleasant one, yes, but still an overload. “I’m so, so sorry,” Chuck murmured as he stroked my hair. “I swear, if I had any idea that you were in even the smallest bit of danger, I would have done everything I could to stop it.”

 

I shook my head fiercely. “It’s not your fault, Chuck.”

 

“But it is. And I’m sorry.”

 

“You didn’t know Barachiel was going to do that.”

 

“I should have. When I first discovered your soul was missing, I should have investigated further, asked more questions, _something_. Instead, I was so focused on finding you I pushed everything else to the side. And that got you kidnapped and almost sold to the King of Hell. If Crowley wasn’t the type to cast his lot in with the Winchesters more often than not …”

 

“Speaking of …” I interrupted, lifting my head and pushing away just slightly so I could look him in his face, “… what was that all about?”

 

A smirk lifted one end of his lips as he explained, “Early this morning, I heard your prayer, telling me about Barachiel …”

 

“You heard me?”

 

“Yes, yes I did. And while it gave us a good head start, we realized that Barachiel must have set up powerful wards to hide both them and you from us. Crowley, however, came directly to us and told us what was happening and devised a plan to get you out safely.”

 

I nodded. “He’d said something about plan b before he disappeared.”

 

He chuckled. “Our initial plan involved Crowley transporting the Winchesters outside the house to start breaking the wards before negotiating for your sale. I guess they were a little quicker than he was thinking, because he was supposed to make the deal, take hold of you, and then bring you back here, leaving Barachiel alone and vulnerable to the three archangels coming in after them. When the Winchesters broke the ward, Barachiel knew … so your rescue was left to the archangels.” He smiled gently as he added, “Which, they did.”

 

“Yeah,” I said with a chuckle. “Never thought I’d get _saved_ by Lucifer.”

 

“Ah, yes, he has quite the history.”

 

“So, he’s not bad?”

 

“Well, he was, for a long time. But that was my fault. We’ve recently reconciled and he’s come back into the fold, where he belongs.”

 

I nodded as I bit my lip, remembering what Lucifer had said to Barachiel in the house.

 

Chuck sighed as he looked at me, his eyes taking on a sad tone as he said, almost in a whisper, “I’m so sorry. I … there’s just … I don’t know what else to say, but it just doesn’t feel like it’s enough.” He cleared his throat before he added, “If you, you know, want to take a break for a while, then go ahead and take your time. It’s okay.”

 

My brow furrowed slightly. A break? Really? In between thoughts of home and worries about what was going to happen, Chuck was about all I could think about. It felt strange, in a way, to feel so strongly and deeply about someone I’d really just met, but that was the truth. I had been so reserved and so cautious because of my past, because of my preconceived notions. But at the end of the day, I couldn’t deny what I felt, and what I felt was that I definitely wanted to be with him, come hell or high water. Figuratively and literally.

 

He must have taken my silence as a desire to part for a time, as he pursed his lips and lowered his eyes, nodding as he murmured, “I understand, I do.”

 

My brain froze up for a moment. I didn’t know if it was the exhaustion that had completely taken me over after my shower or the rush of emotions that I was still processing, but instead of saying anything in protest, I pulled him down and pressed my lips firmly against his. He stiffened for just a split-second in surprise, but then responded, pulling me close, one arm around my shoulders and the other around my waist. My skin tingled where his beard scraped against it and I swore he must have been able to feel my heart pounding out of my chest. I wasn’t quite sure what possessed me to take this giant leap with our relationship, but I did. And I didn’t regret it one bit. We parted slowly, and as we did, I saw tears shining in his eyes, mirroring my own. I cupped his cheek and looked directly at him as I said firmly, “This whole thing, this whole situation is so strange, and weird, and beyond me, but … damnit, I want it. I want _you_. I don’t really know how this will go, or what the future holds for us, all I know is that I want you to be by my side through it. It just … it feels right. And no matter what hangups I have, I want to work through it. I want to work through it with you.”

 

As I was speaking, the tears in Chuck’s eyes had started to fall, and so did mine. The feelings pulsing through me made me feel vulnerable and raw and yet in Chuck’s presence I felt safe and secure. In that coffee shop in Minneapolis, we’d come to an understanding. Now, standing in Chuck’s room, our relationship hit a meaningful milestone. One that I knew would affect the rest of my life. I think Chuck felt it, too, as he shakily breathed, “Kiz.” He kissed me back, flaring a wave of passion between us as his fingers slipped through the wet strands of my hair. When we parted he softly kissed my forehead, caressing the top of my cheekbone with his thumb. “I truly don’t deserve you,” he whispered.

 

“Don’t say that,” I replied, just as softly.

 

He just smiled gently, his eyes crinkling as he asked. “Are you really okay? Do you need anything?”

 

I nodded. I was going to be a little more paranoid for a while, but as long as I had Chuck and his support, I would make it just fine. What I could have really used, though … “A nap,” I replied with a chuckle. “I barely slept at all.”

 

“Of course.” He kissed my forehead one more time before he stepped aside and motioned to the bed, pulling down the quilt and sheet for me. I wasn’t about to say no to the invitation as I slipped underneath the covers, lying on my side as I pulled the blankets back over me. Chuck leaned over and tucked me in, kissing my temple. “Sleep, you’re safe now,” he whispered, and half a second later I slipped into restful bliss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First kiss(es)! Ahhh!


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kind of a filler chapter, but I wanted to get Chuck's perspective. :)

Chuck smiled softly at Kismet’s sleeping figure before he softly closed the door behind him. He wasn’t surprised she was so tired, what did surprise him was her reaction to the whole situation.

 

After being kidnapped and almost sold off, he’d figured that would scare her away, at least for a while. And, if he was being honest, he felt he deserved it. He had deliberately not looked into the circumstances surrounding her birth and as a result, Barachiel’s plot had remained hidden until now. Of all the times for him to be careless, it had to be one of the important things in the entire universe to him. He was glad that at least she hadn’t been harmed, but it could have been much, much worse. It wasn’t just his imagination, either, Barachiel’d had some seriously sinister plans for her. They had admitted as much once Chuck had arrived.

 

He had been furious when he appeared in the old farmhouse, so much so that he’d forgone transporting himself in his vessel in favour of appearing in his true form. Once Dean and Sam had removed the last remaining ward that kept him out, he’d come roaring in with a vengeance to see Barachiel restrained by Michael, Gabriel, and Castiel. Barachiel snarled to see him, and Chuck was surprised at how much it hurt to see one of his children with such obvious contempt on their face, both their vessel’s face and their true face. Despite his anger, he had to wonder just how wrong he had gone to provoke this reaction. “Barachiel … why?” he’d asked, the simple question the only thing that had come to his divine mind.

 

The angel had chuckled darkly. “You should know why. If you paid any kind of attention, you’d know why. You created us first, we were your _children_. And you would toss us all aside? For what? A _human_?”

 

“She’s not just any human …”

 

“Yes, yes, I know, she’s your _soulmate_ ,” the seraph spat. “We loved you, Father. _I_ loved you. Above all else. Even the humans you told us to love more. I didn’t care. There was always only you. And I refuse to place my affections in anyone else. Not for pathetic, weak humans, and certainly not for some conjured mate.”

 

That stung a little bit. Yes, Chuck had been lonely, yes he had wanted someone by his side, but he’d also wanted a mother figure for the angels as well. He wouldn’t go as far as to say that creating Kismet was something completely selfless, but … well, it wasn’t completely selfish, either. “I wanted someone for all of us, not just myself. I thought you all deserved a mother just as much as I deserved a mate. Why don’t you want that?”

 

“Because I don’t _need_ her. I don’t need anyone except you, Father. I never will.”

 

Had he been in a physical form, he would have had to fight back tears. His anger hadn’t dissipated in the slightest, but added to it was an underlying layer of sadness and pity. He had wanted everyone to be happy, but it seemed that even the Almighty couldn’t accomplish that. He leaned into Barachiel’s mind, searching, trying to see if there was anything in there that indicated that they could be rehabilitated. Barachiel resisted initially, but there was no keeping him out. Not even a powered up angel could do that. He searched and searched, but found nothing and sighed. He hadn’t wanted to do this, despite his anger, despite his wrath, he didn’t want to destroy one of his children. But if there was truly no hope for rehabilitation, he couldn’t simply imprison them and risk them escaping. The destruction they could bring … no, he couldn’t risk it. Not anymore. He’d taken too many chances already, taken on risks he hadn’t been fully prepared for, and others had paid the price for it. He would end this.

 

And he did. He didn’t want to harm the vessel, so he drew the angel’s form out and, once they had been extracted, he smote them, immediately banishing them to The Empty for good. He sighed heavily at the sentence he’d had to carry out, wishing he hadn’t had to do that. But it simply wasn’t worth the risk. After instructing Michael to return the vessel to her to home, he slipped back to the bunker, into his vessel, which had been waiting patiently in a darkened room in the bunker. He hadn’t wanted to use a room where somebody could stumble on him while he was reentering his vessel and die from looking at him, so he was tucked away next to the furnace. After stretching and flexing a little to readjust to his human vessel, he made his way out of the furnace room and down the hall, running into Lucifer. “You got her out of there?” he confirmed with the archangel.

 

Lucifer nodded. “She’s in your room. Taking a shower right now.”

 

“How is … I mean, how …”

 

“She’s fine, physically. Minor injuries, but I’ve already healed them.”

 

“Injuries?”

 

“Barachiel left some bruises and marked her with an angel blade. Nothing too serious.”

 

That boiling anger started to return, but Chuck shoved it back down. No use getting angry about it now, Barachiel was dead and gone. A few deep breaths and it slowly dissipated.

 

Lucifer glanced around, licking his lips before he asked, “What about … Barachiel?”

 

Chuck wasn’t sure how Lucifer would react to hear of the death of one of his friends, but there was no dodging the truth. “They’re gone. I … I had no choice, truly. I didn’t want to, I … I wanted everyone to be happy, but …” He looked up at his son. “I’m sorry.”

 

Lucifer looked sad, but he smiled. “I know. I don’t know what poisoned Barachiel’s mind after all these years, but that was not the friend I once knew. Don’t blame yourself for what others choose.” He clapped a hand to Chuck’s shoulder. “Mother should be out of the shower soon. Go to her. She’ll need you.”

 

Chuck smiled wryly. “You really think she’ll want to see _me_ after all this?”

 

“She asked about you.”

 

That was a surprise. “She did?”

 

Lucifer chuckled. “Just go, Father.”

 

Chuck would have been lying if he’d said he wasn’t nervous at all entering his room. He heard the shower still going and breathed a sigh of relief. He got just a little longer to gather himself, his thoughts, his emotions. As much as he felt it, he didn’t want to just fall apart at seeing her. He was afraid how she would react if he did. Would anyone truly want him at his most pathetic? Even he didn’t know. As he stood there a moment, however, a sudden realization hit him: Kismet didn’t have any spare clothes. He chewed his lip a moment, trying to decide if he wanted to quickly grab some clothes of her own from her apartment or if that would be considered too skeevy. He eventually decided on simply conjuring some new clothes for her, figuring if she really wanted some clothes of her own then he could take her to her apartment and get some. For now, just something simple … some sweatpants and a t-shirt, along with some necessary undergarments. He also conjured a brush to make detangling easier, and knocked gently on the door, setting the small bundle on the counter for her once she finished.

 

He tried not to pace as he waited, but he was feeling fidgety and ended up shoving his hands in his pockets just so he could stand still for a second. His mind was racing, going through all the possibilities of what was about to happen, but once that bathroom door opened, he went completely blank at the sight of her. Dressed simply in the conjured clothes, her hair wet and loose, her skin pink from the heat of the water, his mouth was suddenly dry and he couldn’t quite remember what he’d been thinking just a moment before. He didn’t move, he could barely breathe, but when she came to him and embraced him it was like the whole world around him breathed quietly in silent relief. He hadn’t known if he would ever get this chance, to hold her in his arms, to feel her form wrapped in his. He stumbled over his words, his apology, but Kismet in all her infinite grace simply accepted it and, surprisingly, more.

 

He definitely hadn’t been expecting that, but he smiled as his lips tingled at the memory. Finally, _finally_. It was like something within him had settled ever so slightly, the part that had been roaring at him to move, to act, to claim her, it had been at least temporarily satisfied by the kisses so willingly and freely given. _Is this really what all human soulmates go through?_ Despite observing the process for so long after creating it, he had never anticipated the drive and the want and the need being so strong.

 

Quietly, he made his way back to the library and the entrance of the bunker, where everyone else had congregated. The Winchesters had cracked open a couple of beers, and even Gabriel had joined them as he sipped on a bottle, himself. Chuck felt lighter than he had in days as he opened a bottle as well and took a long swig. “Went that bad?” Gabriel asked him.

 

“No, no,” Chuck replied. “Went that _good_.”

 

The trickster’s eyebrows jumped up in surprise. “Really?”

 

Chuck nodded. “Really. I apologized, offered her a break, and she said no. Said she didn’t want to leave.” He took another sip to prevent from spilling everything that had happened in the room. Some things he wanted to keep to himself.

 

Gabriel, however, was a little too perceptive. “And that’s _all_?”

 

He didn’t reply, but everyone in the room gathered the answer when his cheeks flushed ever so slightly and he coughed before raising the beer to his lips.

 

“Oh _really_?” Lucifer teased, laughing.

 

“Who would have thought that _God_ was bashful?” Dean commented.

 

Chuck could practically feel the heat radiating off of his ears and neck, but he stayed silent, taking the teasing and prodding with good sport.

 

“So where is she?” Sam asked.

 

“Sleeping,” Chuck replied, thankful to the younger Winchester for changing the subject. “I think she barely slept while Barachiel had her.”

 

“Likely not,” Michael commented.

 

“I’ll wake her up when it’s time to eat. Until then, I’ll let her get all the sleep she wants.” He smiled softly, remembering her sleeping form curled up on his bed, tucked into his blankets, breathing in his scent while she slept. He would be lying if it didn’t instill him with some small measure of pride that she immediately relaxed and fell asleep in his bed. He wanted to join her, to lie by her side and hold her if nothing else, but he didn’t want to push too hard too fast. They had only just been reunited, and that had admittedly gone far better than he had hoped. He had to be patient, but considering how things had gone, he didn’t think he would be waiting for too much longer.


	18. Chapter 18

Once I'd crawled into Chuck’s bed, it felt like I had died, I slept so soundly and so deep. I hadn’t even budged an inch, which was unusual for me as I tended to wriggle around in the night. I didn’t even dream at all, thankfully considering my recent stressful circumstances Thus, it was with great difficulty that I was roused from sleep. I barely even registered someone shaking my shoulder, the only thing that really prodded me from rest was Chuck’s voice, low and soft in my ear. “Kiz, hey, c’mon. You need to eat.”

 

I groaned in protest but complied, sitting up slowly as I ran my fingers through my hair and got my bearings. I was initially confused about where I was for a moment until I remembered … the bunker, the shower, Chuck’s room. It all started coming back to me, including the fact that I’d impulsively kissed him. I could feel my ears burn slightly, now suddenly unsure if that had been the right move or not, but the only thing Chuck seemed concerned about at the moment was waking me up and getting me to eat. I yawned and rubbed my eyes and complied, standing up slowly and allowing him to guide me down a few hallways until we emerged into a kitchen. We weren’t the only ones present, either, there were those two men I’d seen the very first time I’d come to the bunker, Castiel, Gabriel, Lucifer, and who I assumed was Michael via process of elimination. The tallest of them all stepped forward and offered his hand. “Hey, I don’t think we actually got introduced before. I’m Sam, Sam Winchester. This is my brother, Dean,” he said as he motioned with his head to the other man standing there. The man-now-known-as-Dean gave a cursory finger raise wave to indicate greeting. Sam licked his lips as he said, “We had meant to, uh, you know … but last time …”

 

“Last time I was here was really … interesting …” I finished with a slight chuckle. “Don’t tell me you guys play match maker for divine beings all the time.”

 

He chuckled, his smile naturally reaching his eyes as Gabriel behind him smirked. “No, no not really. This was … yeah this was the first time. And I’m sorry that …”

 

I cut him off before he could continue his awkward apology. “Don’t. It’s fine. I don’t really think there was any _good_ way to break … this,” I said, motioning, indicating _everything_. This whole supernatural thing was still very strange to me, and I wondered briefly if I was in some sort of numb denial. Well, only time would tell.

 

And just like that, the slight tension in the air broke. Ease slid into its place as the humans gathered around the table to grab some pizza and eat. They’d made sure to grab a plain cheese one for me, and while it was some local small town pizzeria I’d never heard of, it was pretty damn tasty. It was interesting to watch the men interact with these angels, these powerful beings made of pure divine intent, and watch them scold or talk back to them like said divine beings couldn’t just immediately snap them if half if they wished. It was an air of familiarity born out of years of interaction, some good, some bad, but all experience. It was like an odd family of sorts, and as I watched, something in me felt like it settled. Like this was nice. Like I could get used to it. As I’d told Chuck earlier, this was definitely strange and weird. But, almost just as strangely, it seemed _right_.

 

After dinner, Michael pushed himself off of the wall that he’d been leaning against, cleared his throat, and said, “Alright, we need to figure out how we’re going to proceed from here.”

 

Chuck sighed. “Do we have to do this now?”

 

“Better to get it over with and act now,” the archangel replied, and Chuck nodded in acquiescence.

 

“Well, what are we deciding here?” I asked.

 

Michael fixed his eyes on me as he explained. “The decision itself is up to you, of course. But depending on what you decide, it will determine how we act accordingly.”

 

I was still a little confused. “I’m sorry, I don’t think I follow. Decide what?”

 

“Do you want to go back to your apartment?”

 

“Well, yeah,” I responded immediately, folding my arms. “I mean, why wouldn’t I? It’s mine.”

 

He nodded. “Fair enough. In that case, before you return, we will need to make sure it is properly warded.”

 

“Warded?”

 

Chuck answered this time. “Against demons, creatures, anything that might want to harm you.”

 

Michael continued that line of thought. “Barachiel might be taken care of, but there are a lot more beings out there that might want to do even more harm to you. So, we have to taken certain precautions. One will be the wards we’ll have to make in your apartment. Second … one of us will have to guard you, to ensure your safety. We simply cannot risk anything else happening to you.”

 

“When you say one of you, you mean …”

 

“One of us angels,” he replied. “Though, I doubt Castiel and Gabriel will be well suited, considering they already have … charges.” By the way he nodded his head at the Winchester brothers, I assumed he meant them.

 

Lucifer spoke up then, “I’ll volunteer.” He glanced around the room a second before looking at Michael and adding, “You have your duties in heaven. I’m newly sprung from the cage, so I’m just a floater. It makes sense.”

 

Michael nodded. “If that’s fine with you, Kismet?”

 

“Sure,” I nodded, not really caring either way. Just a few weeks ago I hadn’t even believed in God or angels or the devil, and now I was literally having Lucifer be my guardian angel. Sure. That was normal, right?

 

It wasn’t long before I was thrown for a loop again, this time by Lucifer. “I’ll have to mark you, then.”

 

My brow furrowed. “Mark me?”

 

“It’s … ancient angel magic. It will help shield you from the worst and also give me a sort of … direct link to you. So in the off chance that anything _were_ to happen to you, it would allow me to not only find you but break through any warding set up to keep me out.”

 

Angel magic. Okay. I slowly nodded, feeling like I was only just barely following along. “So how does this work, then?”

 

Lucifer winced. “It’s not … exactly pleasant. It will hurt, but it will be brief, that I promise. It’s just a small touch and the Enochian sigils are carved into your ribs.”

 

It was my turn to wince as I subconsciously clutched my side. That did not sound very pleasant at all. But did I really have any other choice? If this whole episode with Barachiel proved anything, it was that this path that I walked, as much as I consented to it and wanted it, it was potentially dangerous. That wasn’t really something one had to consider when dating anyone else, what kind of supernatural being might come crawling out of the woodwork to hurt you. It was a scary thought, but the slight pang of fear was brief and fleeting. I’d meant what I’d told Chuck earlier. Despite my misgivings, despite the potential danger, I wanted this. I nodded. “Go ahead, then. Do it.”

 

He leaned forward and right before his fingers touched me, he whispered, “I’m sorry.”

 

His apology barely registered before a searing pain arced through me, like I’d been burned and cut and electrocuted all at once. Like he’d promised, it was brief, but it was so intense I was glad I was sitting down so I didn’t double over. As it was, I leaned forward and grasped the table, my vision blurring and my forehead breaking a sweat as I rode out the initial shockwave of pain. Once the black spots dissipated from my field of vision, I slowly sat back up. The brothers Winchester looked a tad uncomfortable themselves. Dean mumbled, “Yeah I remember how bad that was.”

 

Sam winced. “You think having it done once is bad, trying having it _re_ done.”

 

I paled a little as I looked at him. “You had it done _twice_. Whatever for?”

 

He smirked. “Castiel did the first marks, but Gabriel … well, he’s a little possessive sometimes.”

 

I looked between the man and the grinning archangel for a moment before I commented. “You are a saint.”

 

Lucifer barked in laughter. “You heard it from Mom, it’s official!”

 

We all laughed a moment and when we settled down, I asked Michael, “So, this … warding thing that’s going to happen to my apartment … how does that happen? Like, how long does it take?”

 

“We can take the Wincesters over tomorrow, with their help the initial warding itself should be finished and you can move back in by this time tomorrow. We’ll need to come back and paint back over it, of course, but no reason you can’t live there in the meantime.”

 

“Wait, paint over it?”

 

Dean spoke up at that point. “We have to paint the sigils all over the walls, just to be safe. Don’t worry, we’ll paint over it so your landlord won’t even know the difference.” He winked as he took a sip of beer, a gesture that was generally reassuring but I was still a little worried. I was a good tenant. I always paid my rent on time, if not early. I made sure to never damage anything in the apartment and if something needed maintenance I was always immediately on the phone so as to lessen any potential damage. To willingly consent to defacing my apartment walls - even knowing it was going to be covered up - it just left me feeling weird. This was all necessary, though, a part of living this new life. So, certain compromises would just have to be made. I nodded and said, “Alright, then. I don’t suppose you need the keys do you? Wait …” I face palmed. “I have no idea where my keys are. Or my phone. Or my coat!”

 

“I have them allhere, Kiz,” Chuck assured. “That’s kind of how I figured you weren’t just late to our date. They’re all in my room.”

 

Well, that was a relief. “Thanks.” I groaned as I said, “I’m gonna hafta call Max tonight and hope he won’t be too mad at me for no showing. He _hates_ that.”

 

“Oh I wouldn’t worry too much about that,” Dean said. He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out an ID that, upon my glance, looked like an FBI badge. “These things really come in handy sometimes. When we were trying to find you, we interviewed a few people, your boss included. We didn’t disclose everything, of course, but we did let him know that you were reported missing and we intimated that it appeared to be potentially linked to a series of disappearances all over the Midwest … I don’t think he’s gonna give you too much hassle over it.”

 

I sighed with relief. “Well one less thing to worry about. I still need to call him, though, let him know I’m alright.” Just then, another part of what he said hit me. “Wait, how many people did you interview?”

 

“Your two friends, Steph and Renee. The bartender at LUSH. And Max. That’s all, I promise. And Max wasn’t really necessary, but … well, we weren’t sure when we would be able to get to you and figured you might appreciate having a job once we did.”

 

I nodded. It definitely was appreciated, and to be honest I felt quite humbled that these men who barely even knew me seemed to drop everything just to help. Thanks didn’t quite seemed adequate, but it was all I had at the moment. “Thank you. _All_ of you.”

 

Later, after the dishes were cleared and everyone retired to their respective quarters, Chuck led me back to his room and opened his closet door. There, just inside, was my jacket, and he fumbled in the pockets for a moment before he produced my phone. “I charged it for you, too, so you should be good to go. Your keys are in your other pocket, too, in case you were wondering.”

 

I chuckled. “Thanks, Chuck, I … I don’t really know what to say to all this. It’s …” tears stung the edges of my eyes for a moment, “… it just feels like a whole of fuss for just one person.”

 

“Well, I hate to break it to you, Kiz, but … you are kind of a big deal.”

 

My cheeks instantly reddened, and I was sure that it was embarrassingly noticeable due to being makeup free. “I’m just gonna call Max real quick, okay?” I said before I ducked out, wanting just a little privacy. I didn’t go far, just the little library looking area. I sighed as I brought up my contacts, groaning at all the missed calls and text messages and voicemails. _Fuck, this is gonna be complicated._ I took a deep breath right before I pressed Max’s number. _Better now than later_.

 

The line rang a couple of times before Max answered the phone nonchalantly. “Hello?”

 

I shook my head. He obviously hadn’t looked at who was calling before he answered. That was one of his things, just answering without even looking at what number was on the screen. Good to know some things never changed, even in the short amount of time I was gone. “Hey, Max, it’s me …”

 

I couldn’t even get the sentence out before Max sputtered, “What?” I heard a jumble and clatter on the other line and the sound of fabric scraping against the mic. When Max finally returned on the line, the shock was pretty evident in his voice. “Kizzy? Is that you? My _god_ , are you okay? Where are you?”

 

“I’m, I’m okay. I’m safe. Those, uh, those agents that came to see you? They got me out.”

 

“Got you out? Out of _where_ , Kiz? Where have you been?”

 

I sighed. “It’s a long story and, I’m not sure now’s the time, but I’m safe now and I wanted to call and let you know.”

 

“Shit, you had us really worried, you know. I … I didn’t have any family or anyone to contact for you, I didn’t really know what to tell the guys, I just felt useless.”

 

“Hey, it’s alright. I’m alright. I’m, ah … I’m actually kinda glad those agents contacted you.” I chuckled. “This whole thing would be a helluva lot more awkward if I had to call you and tell you why I no showed.”

 

“Oh _god_ I would have felt so bad, too. You know how mad I would have gotten.”

 

“Yeah. I was kind of dreading calling you until they told me you knew already.”

 

We both laughed a little at that. I knew Max pretty well, and even though he was a real stickler in some ways and would have been supremely unhappy at a no show, he would have been mortified to find out its cause was something like, oh I don’t know, kidnapping? We chatted a little bit longer about more mundane things, about his kids and their school activities. It felt good to just focus on something _normal_ for once, and the antics of a high-strung couple and their kids definitely provided a nice distraction. When the subject of when I would return came up, he absolutely refused to let me come in the next day. I tried to protest, tried to assure him that I was fine, but he wouldn’t hear it. “Absolutely not!”

 

“But Max, come on!”

 

“Kiz, I’m putting my foot down. If you show up at the office tomorrow I’ll kick you right back out.”

 

“But I’m _fine_.”

 

“But I don’t care! You need to take a little bit, settle back in to things.”

 

“A distraction would be nice to help. You know, like _working_.”

 

He sighed heavily. “I _suppose_ if you really are feeling up to it … you can come in the day after tomorrow. No buts!” he said when I started to protest. “I won’t hear another word. I’m already logging in to our admin website and marking it down as a vacation day for you.”

 

“ _Fine_ ,” I sighed in mock exasperation. As much as I wanted to go back to work, it was nice that Max cared about me. I was well aware that not everybody had bosses as understanding as he was. Hell, Steph’s boss probably would have berated her for getting kidnapped in the first place and wouldn’t have given her vacation hours because she hadn’t requested it properly.

 

After I got off the phone with Max, I paused for a moment before I started to go back to Chuck’s room. Dean had said they had also interviewed Steph and Renee, which meant they knew I was missing, which meant that they were probably really worried. However, after the conversation with Max, I was mentally exhausted and didn’t feel like I could handle doing that another two times. Just leaving them hanging didn’t feel right, though, so after a little internal debate, I created a group text conversation so I didn’t even have to type out a message twice. I just told them some sparse facts, that I’d been taken but that I had been found and that I was fine and I would talk to them as soon as I could. I got almost immediate responses from both of them, relieved but asking me a million questions rapid fire. _How do I even handle this?_ I quickly felt overwhelmed and was incredibly grateful I hadn’t called them. I simply replied that I’d just gotten out of an FBI interview room and I didn’t feel like rehashing everything but that I would talk to them later. They let it be at that, and I felt truly blessed to have understanding and supportive friends.

 

By the time I made it back to Chuck’s room, I felt emotionally drained, and even though I had taken a nap earlier, I felt like I could crawl right back into bed and go to sleep. When I opened the door and Chuck smiled at me, I couldn’t help but smile back, despite how I felt. My exhaustion must have showed as he asked, “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”

 

“Yeah, I’m just … tired, I guess,” I replied with a chuckle.

 

He pulled me into a hug. “You wanna just to go sleep?” he asked.

 

I nodded against his chest. “Where am I staying for the night?”

 

Chuck paused a moment before he responded. “You didn’t want to stay with me?”

 

“I do, it’s just … where are you gonna sleep? _Do_ you sleep?”

 

He chuckled. “Yeah. I don’t have to, strictly speaking, but it’s nice. And the bed’s plenty big enough for both of us. Unless you weren’t comfortable with that.”

 

My face grew warm, and I was suddenly very glad that it was currently buried in his chest. As much as it felt awkward to admit, sleeping next to Chuck sounded like … well, heaven, for lack of a better word. “Actually that sounds … really nice.”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

Chuck let me use the bathroom first to get ready for bed, since he had more to do, so I quickly brushed my teeth and attended to other needs before I exited, giving him a quick kiss before I crawled into bed to wait for him. I actually started to doze while he did whatever he needed to, but I woke and opened my eyes when the bed sank with his weight. I smiled sleepily at him as he slipped under the covers with me and he returned it, his eyes crinkling up in a way that made my heart feel like it fluttered in my chest. He leaned close to give me one last kiss goodnight before he waved a hand and turned out the lights. “Oh now _that_ has got to come in handy.”

 

“There are perks to being divine.”

 

“Showoff.”

 

He chuckled before he spoke again, his voice soft and low, “Goodnight, Kiz.”

 

I replied just as quietly. “Night, Chuck.” Even in the darkness, I could practically feel his presence as he laid there, face to face, not touching but still somehow in each other’s space. I fell asleep quickly that night, his comforting presence surrounding me in a quiet lull.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, uh, yeah, this chapter was actually supposed to be a little different, but Lucifer took over and kind of ... yeah. Maybe in the next chapter I can start to get into what I'd want to cover in this chapter LOL.

I ended up sleeping in far later than normal the next day. I supposed I was just still tired, but the others seemed content to let me sleep and I was grateful for the extra time. Chuck and Lucifer were actually the only ones I saw for most of the day, and I guessed the others were perhaps doing whatever it was they needed to do to my apartment. Warding, did they call it? I was a little anxious, knowing that my apartment was being defaced while I just sat there, but according to them it was necessary, and I supposed I should defer to the experts. I didn’t know half of anything about this supernatural stuff, and I couldn’t even pretend if I wanted to. But, if they said this would help protect me, then I trusted them. Chuck and, yes, even Lucifer, had given me no reason to not trust them so far. And while there was still a small part of me that was cautious, that said to be careful, I found that more and more I really did trust them, and trust Chuck in particular.

 

By the time evening finally rolled around, the job was declared done for the day, and after a meal with Chuck, Lucifer said he would take me back to my place, if I still wanted to go back. And so, I bid him goodbye with a kiss, and Lucifer reached out to take my shoulder and fly me back to my apartment.

 

After I adjusted myself from the lurch of landing, reaching out to the island countertop just to help steady me, I almost startled to see the state of the apartment. Covering almost every inch of every wall I could see were black paint marks, random symbols I knew nothing of. _So this is warding?_ They meant nothing to me, and I only hoped they worked for all the trouble that had gone into putting them on my wall. I also hoped that whatever paint they used to cover them up with later would actually cover it up, because if not … well, I could kiss my deposit goodbye.

 

Lucifer noticed my staring as he asked, “Like the handiwork?”

 

“It’s, uh … it’s rather extensive, isn’t it?”

 

“After Barachiel, I don’t think Dad wants to take any chances.”

 

I definitely couldn’t fault him for that. Truth be told, I wasn’t any kind of eager to repeat that kind of experience. Even though I didn’t know how this whole warding thing worked, the fact that Chuck and the others put so much weight in it did help me feel a bit safer. And, of course, I would also have an archangel with me pretty much at all times, too. So, ya know, who needed a security system? Despite the safety precautions, I still felt a little jumpy, and so I took one of my sleeping pills before I bid Lucifer goodnight and retreated into my room, coming out only to go tend to my nightly regimen in the bathroom. On my way back to my room, somehow not feeling self-conscious at all in my slip nightgown and robe, I offered to pull out the bed in my couch, but he declined, plopping himself down on the corner. “Angels don’t need rest. Don’t worry about me,” he assured with a wink.

 

“Alright,” I said with a chuckle. “Good night, then.”

 

“Night, Mom.”

 

I smiled before I stepped back and closed the door, the title tugging on my heartstrings just a little harder than I would have thought. Me? A mother? It was so strange to think of myself this way. I hadn’t been opposed to a partner who already had kids, of course, but this … this was above and beyond anything I’d ever even thought of, could have dreamed of. It wasn’t just kids, these children were _angels_ , fully formed divine intent concentrated in a living being. And _they_ looked up to _me_. I wasn’t sure I was ever going to get used to that.

 

The next morning, I groaned as my alarm sounded, reaching to turn it off before lying in bed for a few minutes to gather my wits about me. Shaking my head to make sure I didn’t fall back asleep, I slipped out of bed and pulled on my robe, yawning as I made my way to the kitchen to switch on my coffee pot. I normally prepped the night before, but since I hadn’t brewed what I’d set up for Sunday morning before I left for clubbing Saturday night, I had left it as is. I nearly jumped to see Lucifer still perched on the sofa. “Good morning,” he said with a smirk. “I take it Mommy isn’t a morning person?”

 

“Eh, not really,” I replied, my voice a little hoarse from sleep while I yawned again as I opened a cabinet to fetch a mug. Once I’d poured the hot liquid into the ceramic - along with a little sugar and creamer - I brought it up to my face and inhaled. This was one of the best parts of my day, the smell of coffee just before the first sip of the day. That moment where the world just took a collective breath and held still. And then that sip … and then a relaxation, a sigh as the world greeted a new day. I may not always want to be up so early, but this moment made it that much easier.

 

I heard a soft chuckle from my right, and I turned just slightly to see Lucifer there, shaking his head. “What?” I said, somewhat indignantly. “I’m human, I need this,” I added before I took another sip and took it with me to the bathroom. As per usual, I’d do my hair and makeup while I finished my coffee before I got dressed. It was easier than risking getting powder on my clothes. On a robe, it didn’t really matter.

 

I did a simple makeup job, as I usually did during the week, before I combed through my hair and pulled it up into a quick bun. Nothing fancy, just easy to deal with during the work day. I didn’t often actually wear my hair down for work, it was normally too much trouble. I was always looking down through paperwork or to look for files, and constantly tucking my hair behind my ear or otherwise shoving it out of my face got pretty old pretty damn quick. I would be exceedingly happy when we went paperless and had everything stored on a cloud, but until then, we did things the old fashioned way. Maybe then I could actually wear my hair down more often during the week. Of course … that was if I was even still around. I hadn’t really given it much thought, but, what happened once I committed myself fully to this? From what I gathered, my soul was meant to be divine, but what actually occurred once Chuck did that? Would I really still be human? Or something else entirely?

 

I shook my head as I finished my coffee. This was too much heavy thinking for this early in the day. What I needed to do was get my ass in gear and get to the office. It just wouldn’t do to be late to my first day back.

 

Once back in my room, I pulled out a pale pink blazer and a silky white tank to pair with the first pair of slacks I put my hands on, which just so happened to be one of my favourite pair of skinny grey pants. It was simple, but put together, and paired with a nice necklace I didn’t look like I just rolled out of bed. I shoved on a pair of matching pink heels, pulled on my jacket, grabbed my purse, and I was ready to head out.

 

Lucifer was standing by the island in the kitchen, and as I emerged and headed toward the door, he asked, “And just where do you think you’re going?”

 

“Uh, work?”

 

“Don’t want the angel express?”

 

I chuckled. As tempting as that would be, I didn’t need any more temptation to sleep in any further in the morning. “I kinda like the drive. It’s nice and relaxing.” I shrugged. “Come with me if you’re so concerned.”

 

“Oh I was already planning on that,” he winked, following me out the door.

 

As we walked to the elevator, I asked, “So, are you going to follow me around all day?”

 

“Of course I am. Except for the bathroom. I understand humans crave a little privacy for some things.”

 

“That is definitely appreciated,” I commented as I selected the button for the garage level. “But still, how are you going to explain who you are just … hanging around like that? Not that I don’t trust you, but I don’t think security is going to buy the ‘oh yeah, this is just Lucifer, my guardian angel, he needs to come with me’ spiel.”

 

He laughed out loud, and I found myself charmed by his humour. This was how Satan got everybody, wasn’t it? Well, at least it seemed understandable now. “Don’t worry about that. As archangel I have certain … abilities. One of them is to only appear visible to those I wish. So, you’ll see me … if you want to … but nobody else will be aware I’m here. Either way, whether you see me or not, I’ll be there.”

 

“No off duty?”

 

“Not unless you’re with Chuck.”

 

“Damn. That seems like a bit of a raw deal.”

 

“Why?” he asked, following me to my car, which I unlocked as we approached.

 

“Well, I mean, doesn’t everyone need a break every once in a while?”

 

He shrugged as he got in on the passenger side of my car while I climbed in the driver’s side. “I’ve technically been off-duty for centuries now, if anything I’m making up for lost time.”

 

“Lost time? You mean …”

 

“When I was locked in the cage. In the pits of hell. Kinda hard to tend to archangel duty when you’re locked away like that.”

 

A realization hit me as I turned the key in the ignition. “Did you take this guardian angel duty because you felt you had to make up for … for that?”

 

“What? No. Well … maybe. Maybe a little. I don’t know.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

He sighed as I pulled out of the parking space and navigated out of the garage. “I mean … when Dad and I and Michael and, well, _everyone_ got together and reconciled, we all agreed to put the past behind us, in every aspect. To forgive and forget everything that the other had done to us. I forgave Dad for unfairly burdening me with the Mark and then abandoning me when the Mark’s affects took hold, he forgave me for the whole rebellion thing … I forgave Michael for being a dick … you know, we just agreed that we all just wanted to be a family again, and we’d do whatever we had to in order to keep the peace.” He sighed again as he continued, “Thing is, I’ve been gone from heaven for so long, been absent from archangel duty for so long, I’m not sure I really remember what it’s like to … you know, be a part of the family anymore.”

 

Well, unexpected feels from Satan was definitely not how I was expecting the morning drive to go. I looked over at him, as I stopped at a red light and saw the archangel looking down, as if he was contemplating his existence from here on out. I didn’t know what quite possessed me, but I reached over and brushed my fingers along his chin, encouraging him to look at me. When he did, the words I wanted to say almost froze in my throat, but I forced them out anyway. “Hey, look, I … I know I haven’t known Chuck as long as you have. But, I’m pretty sure when he forgives, he doesn’t attach any strings to it. No requirements, no penance, just forgiveness plain and simple. And I’m also pretty sure that he created you to be the way you are for a reason. And when he forgave you, he understood what you were bringing to the table. If he accepted you back, he accepted all of you. That, I’m pretty confident of.”

 

He chuckled softly and looked away. “Why do you have to be so mushy this early in the morning?”

 

It was my turn to laugh. “I thought I was your Mom? Moms are supposed to be mushy!”

 

With the look he shot me at that, it definitely filled me with pride. Okay, so, maybe it was weird to be the soulmate of a divine being and mother figure to countless other divine beings, but … in that moment, it just felt so right. Like, how could I want anything else?


	20. Chapter 20

Work was, thankfully, not the shit show that I’d been thinking it might be. Even though the phone was ringing literally as I stepped into the office, the rest of the morning passed pretty easily. It looked like Max had snagged Tamara to take over for me because the work was actually competently done. Not only that but neatly organized the way I liked to have it, so it was a seamless transition back to work. That had initially been another reason I wanted to return quickly as well, because the longer I was away the bigger chance he would have had to resort to someone like Marvin or Barbara and then the whole office would just be a damn mess that I would be left to sort through. There were times, of course, that being salaried came in handy. But when I was left to work extra for several days just to sort through a mess someone else had made? Those were the times where an hourly wage with OT looked awfully enticing.

 

True to his word, Lucifer stayed out of sight of everybody but me. Of course, knowing that he was carefully watching did make me a little nervous at times, but once I got into the groove, it was like he wasn’t even there.

 

Lunchtime rolled around and Max and I rode the elevator down to the building cafeteria, Lucifer on our heels. I didn’t like the idea of completely ignoring him, so I’d been sneaking him smiles and winks all morning, and I think he’d found it amusing. Of course, it almost backfired when Max caught a hint of my smile when we stepped into the elevator. “What’s so funny?” he asked.

 

“Hmm?”

 

“You were smiling. Think of something funny?”

 

I chuckled. “Something like that.” Lucifer had flashed me a wicked grin and I had to suppress my reaction.

 

In the cafeteria, we parted ways only briefly so we could grab what we wanted. I went for a vegetarian wrap fresh from the cooler, he decided on a cup of hot soup and a small salad. He normally went after burgers and fries and similar fare, and when I teased him he rolled his eyes and said, “Jeffrey’s been after me to eat better, lately. Doctor said my cholesterol was slightly elevated and I think he kind of freaked out.”

 

“Well that just means he cares about you,” I said as we sat down.

 

“Yes, well, sometimes I wish he would care a little _less_.” During lunch I took the time to update him on his schedule and to let him know who he was still expecting updates and reports from so he could send out an e-mail once we got back. All pretty standard stuff, really … aside from Lucifer hanging out at the end of the table, of course. I tried not to make it look too obvious when I glanced at him, and if Max did notice he didn’t say anything about it. It just felt weird to completely ignore someone that was there, even if no one else could see him.

 

Once we were back in the office, the rest of the day slid by pretty easily. Work was going to be a little light for me after the whole conference, but it would pick up soon enough so I made sure to keep on top of things so I didn’t get swamped later. Because of my productivity, I had wrapped everything up by 3:30 and ended up sitting in Max’s office and drinking a cup of tea with him. It had been a little while since we’d gotten to just sit and catch up. Max wasn’t just my boss, he was a friend, and once whom I trusted and went to for advice when I needed it. And, well … I felt like I needed a little guidance from someone on the _outside_.

 

As I sipped my hot beverage, I wondered how to broach the subject, especially with Lucifer in the room, and the opportunity presented itself when Max had to take a moment to text Jeffrey about something. “You know, speaking of, I don’t think you ever told me how you two met.”

 

Max chuckled as he finished the text and then set his phone aside, grabbing his own mug and cradling it. “Well funny thing was, it was a blind date.”

 

“Really?” I said, chuckling in disbelief.

 

“Yeah. He had won two tickets to a Celine Dion concert but he didn’t have anybody to take with him, so a mutual friend of ours recommended me. He called me up and we chatted for a bit, I thought he seemed nice and I figured, hell, free Celine Dion tickets, I wasn’t gonna argue! So we agreed to meet up at the bus station near the venue, only thing was … we had no clue what the other person looked like. And we hadn’t thought to tell each other what we were wearing or anything …” he laughed as he said, “… I mean, this was 1994, nobody was sporting a cell phone or anything. I tried to call him up later to try to get some details but the phone line was busy and I couldn’t get through. So, I figured, nothing for it, I just went ahead to the bus station on a wing and a prayer and hoped I could find him.”

 

“How long did it take for you guys to find each other?”

 

He grinned. “Actually, not long at all. I’m not sure what it was, but I spotted someone get off a bus, and somehow I just _knew_. So I went up to him and introduced myself and sure enough, it was Jeffrey. We went to the concert and had a great time and we ended up just really hitting it off. It was kind of random but … we’ve never been apart since.”

 

“Amazing what can come from a blind date.”

 

“Heh, you’re telling me! Well over twenty years and three kids later … and despite all his worrying and hovering and desire to renovate our bathroom _again_ , I wouldn’t trade him for the world.”

 

I had to laugh. “I thought you guys had just renovated a few months ago?”

 

“We did! A brand new jacuzzi tub, new tile work, repainted the cabinets. But Jeffrey saw something on HGTV about a sunken tub and I think he’s become a little obsessed …”

 

I chuckled as I finished up my tea. Jeffrey worked as an interior designer and he was constantly tweaking and changing up their own house. Max didn’t really care so much about how the place looked, but the almost constant painting and remodeling work did start to get to him once in a while. I had even gotten roped into their projects before, helping Jeffrey paint their dining room a bright blue colour … which stayed put all of five months before he recruited me to paint over it with a pale peach shade. I was usually their go to if they needed help painting, because I loved to paint. Strange as it seemed, it was a very soothing activity, and I always enjoyed it … even if it meant I was usually out at their house every couple of months or so to help paint another room. I was actually surprised Jeffrey hadn’t called me up lately, though the fact that he was obsessing over a sunken tub explained that … he was too busy trying to figure out how he could pull that off he hadn’t even given thought to doing anything else. I still had one more question, though … “Did you know? Like, early on … did you know he was the one?”

 

“Uh, well … I’d like to say no just so I didn’t seem so cliche, but if I’m being honest … the second I laid eyes on him at that bus station, I just knew. There was just an energy about him that drew me to him, and I knew from that moment on that my life had permanently changed.”

 

I nodded as I held my empty mug, reflecting on the information. Even though our circumstances of meeting someone were vastly different, ultimately it reflected what I felt pretty closely, hitting a lot closer to home than I think I’d even like to admit. I mean, I knew I wanted this relationship, but exactly how far was I wanting to go with this? Chuck wasn’t somebody I could just casually date, though truth be told I’d never been interested in that anyway. But what did it mean to have a _serious_ relationship with God? _Not God, Chuck._ I mean, would I stay on earth? Would I live in my same apartment, work at this job, or … what, exactly? I supposed that was just something I would have to talk to Chuck about. But was that a subject I really wanted to breach right now? We had just gotten an even keel, shouldn’t I actually just sit back and enjoy what I had? Ugh. This relationship stuff was so much more complicated than I’d ever thought.

 

“Why did you ask?” Max inquired, sitting back in his chair as he sipped deeply from his own cup.

 

I shrugged. “I was just curious. I realized, for all the time I’d known you guys, I didn’t know how you’d met.”

 

He chuckled for a moment before he asked, “You, ah … don’t think it’s related to any current circumstances?”

 

I was incredibly grateful that I’d already finished my tea, as I definitely would have choked. “What do you mean?”

 

He grinned wider as he said, “Those FBI agents who interviewed me, they mentioned that you’d been reported missing by your boyfriend … needless to say, I was a little surprised, since it’s been … how long since you’ve even been on a date?”

 

“Hey!”

 

“I’m just saying … I figured it must be pretty new if you hadn’t mentioned him yet, but pretty serious if he was already at ‘boyfriend’ status. Unless, that is, he exaggerated your relationship …”

 

I shook my head. Max had caught me red-handed, I couldn’t even be mad. “No, it is pretty new. We just met a few weeks ago. Um, we met up for coffee and then went on a grand total of two dates before the whole … kidnapping thing.” I chuckled as I explained, “We were actually supposed to go on a date that afternoon and I was late meeting with him, that’s how he knew something was up.”

 

Max threw his head back and laughed. Punctuality was one of my strong traits, anybody who knew me knew that I was always on time, if not a little early. “So who is he?”

 

“Well, he goes by Carver Edlund, but his real name is Chuck.”

 

“Carver Edlund? Carver Edlund … why does that sound so familiar?”

 

“He’s a writer, you might have read something by him.”

 

“What has he written?”

 

“His biggest sellers was a series called ‘Supernatural’.”

 

Max snapped his fingers as he made the connection. “That’s where I’ve heard that name. I could never get into it that much, but Jeffrey _loved_ it. He was particularly obsessed with the younger brother … oh what was his name … Sam?”

 

I heard Lucifer chuckle over to my left side, and I had to purse my lips together hard to resist reacting.

 

My boss shook his head as he asked, “Anyway, so how did you two meet?”

 

I chuckled, going with the same story I’d given Steph and Renee. “We just sort of … randomly met. Just kind of bumped into each other and struck up a conversation … from there we met up for coffee, and then he asked me on a date, and … yeah.”

 

“So, uh … you think he’s pretty special?”

 

I could feel my ears burning, wondering if this conversation had been such a good idea to hold with Lucifer in the room. But I was committed now, no going back. “Yeah, yeah I do. I mean, granted I’ve never really been in any kind of a real relationship before, so I don’t really know how to gauge anything, but … I don’t know, it’s like there’s just something different about him.”

 

Max smiled fondly as he commented, “I know what you mean.”

 

During the drive home, I wondered if Lucifer would bring up the conversation, but he seemed content to let it lie for now. Even after I got home and changed into more comfortable attire and started up a stir-fry for dinner, he still didn’t say anything. It was only after I picked up my phone to see that Chuck had texted me, wondering how my day had went, that he finally said anything. “So, uh, earlier …”

 

“Yeah?” I asked, replying to Chuck as I listened, pretty sure I knew where he was going.

 

“Chuck is your first serious relationship?”

 

I shrugged as I set my phone back down and attended to the vegetables. “I guess so, yeah. Why?”

 

“You didn’t have anybody before him?”

 

“I mean, I was kind of engaged once, but I don’t really count that.”

 

“You don’t count _being engaged_?” Lucifer asked incredulously.

 

“No. It was more or less against my will, and it was actually the catalyst for me leaving the cult I’d been raised in.”

 

“Right … I remember Dad had mentioned something about a cult. So … damn, all this time, and nobody else?”

 

I shook my head. “I’ve been on a date here or there, but it never really panned out.”

 

“Why not?”

 

I considered the question as I stirred the vegetables in the wok. It was initially difficult to pin down one singular reason, as it really had depended on the guy. But when I gave it some thought, I realized … “Because it just never felt right. I could never really explain it, but even if the guy was a perfect gentleman, wonderful and nice and gracious and all that, there was just … something that felt like it was missing.” I chuckled. “As much as I hated to admit it when I first met Chuck, there was just something about him, something that seemed to just … I don’t know, leave an impression in a way nobody else had.”

 

He snorted. “Yeah, that sounds like Dad, alright.”

 

“I’m serious! It was like … there was just something about him, about being around him, that felt like it slipped right into the hole of what was missing in my life. Even if I did deny it and try not to think about it at first, I felt it.”

 

Lucifer left the subject alone for the rest of the night, actually consenting to watch some HGTV with me as I relaxed a little before bed. It was strange, just hanging around watching decorating shows with Satan, but if I was honest, we seemed to develop an easy rapport with each other, and it just felt … normal. Good. As I turned in that night, I wondered if perhaps I should be concerned about how my life was going at the moment, about who all I was hanging out with and developing relationships with. These were things that I couldn’t really talk about with my friends, things I couldn’t mention without them thinking I’d gone completely off the deep end. This new life, these new relationships, at times I wasn’t sure what to think about it. It was something I wanted, sure, but sometimes just the thought of what that meant for me and my future … it seemed overwhelming in a way. I sighed as I nestled under the sheets. Chuck had wanted to take me out on a date Saturday afternoon, so I supposed I had until then to think of how I was going to approach the situation.


	21. Chapter 21

We were going to attempt date number three that Saturday afternoon, though Chuck said it would actually be dinner because of the time difference. I had no idea where he was going to be taking me, but it was a nice little distraction to think about during work that week. Not that we were busy or that it was particularly stressful, but in those moments of downtime it’s nice to have something exciting to think about other than what show I was going to marathon or if I was going to motivate myself to maybe do some meal planning for the upcoming week. I swear I was actually going to do that one weekend or another. Not this weekend, of course … though at least I had an actual excuse this time around other than I just procrastinated too long.

 

This time, while getting ready, I felt like I wanted to do more than just curl my hair. I mean, that had been my standard thing for a while now, if I wasn’t working, to just leave it down. But I wanted something a little different. After looking up a few ideas online, I attempted a waterfall braid, but after several failed attempts, I sighed, twisted a couple of portions of hair, and pulled it back in a half up style. I wasn’t exactly talented when it came to doing hair, I knew how to curl it well but that was about it. And most of that was probably helped by the natural wave in my hair anyway. But hey, I’d take what I could get, and I heated up the curling iron while I applied my makeup.

 

Once I finally emerged, a little later than I’d initially planned and still sipping on my now cool cup of coffee, I glanced at the time and realized I needed to get a move on. I hadn’t really thought about what to wear yet, and now I was going to be pressed to figure it out quickly. _Fuck!_

 

Tearing through my closet, I hemmed and hawed between my clubbing dresses and work clothes, trying to find a good balance that wasn’t overly tight or revealing and wasn’t too boring. Finally deciding that an LBD was probably the best way to go when one wasn’t sure, I pulled out my standard go-to. It hit about mid thigh, and though it had long, lacy sleeves that connected to a collar that circled close to my neck, it had an open décolletage that rode a little low. Of course, it wasn’t too bad since I wasn’t overly blessed in the bosom department, but times when I wanted it to be a little extra I’d wear a push up bra, just to emphasize the cleavage. Now was not one of those times, however, and when I finally put on the dress and pulled on some black pumps and got a look at myself in the mirror, I was suddenly nervous. Was this a little too much? It didn’t look like I was going straight to the club, but still … was this really appropriate third date attire? Considering I’d never been on a third date before, I had no clue. A glance at the clock told me I didn’t really have time to change now, so I grabbed my coat and my purse and opened my bedroom door.

 

Lucifer let out a low whistle as I exited, which I wasn’t sure to take as a good sign or not. I chuckled and then bit the bullet and asked Satan, “You don’t think this is … too much?” I motioned around my cleavage area, the one area I was most nervous about.

 

“Uh, no,” he replied. “Why would it be?”

 

“I don’t know, I just … I’ve never been on a third date before so I don’t really know what’s appropriate and what’s not.”

 

He chuckled as he rose from his seat on the sofa and approached me. “You’re overthinking it. Dad’s gonna be happy to see you no matter what you wear, I promise.” Almost as if summoned by an imaginary cue, there was a knock at my door. “Speaking of … let me get that,” Lucifer said, sauntering over to the door and opening it ever so slightly. After confirming who it was, he swung the door open wide and said, like a stereotypical sitcom dad, “Now, I expect you to have her home at a decent hour.”

 

I chuckled as I pulled on my coat and joined them by the door, giving Lucifer a kiss on the cheek before I joined Chuck. “Don’t worry, we’ll be fine.”

 

“Oh, I know you will,” the archangel said with a wink. “You kids be good, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” And with that, he closed the door behind us, leaving Chuck and I alone in the hallway.

 

Holding his hand out, he asked, “Are you ready?”

 

I grinned widely, taking his hand in mine. “Oh yeah, I’m ready.”

 

He returned the smile before he said, “Good.” And then suddenly, everything went black.

 

When everything winked back into existence, I had no idea where we were, but it took my breath away with its beauty. We were on a coast somewhere, and I smelled the salt that told me it was seawater, not a lake. In front of us, nestled into the cliffside, were little colourful buildings spotted everywhere, sweeping along the natural hills that rolled alongside the sea. A little breeze swept over us as we stood there, taking it in, and the whole atmosphere of the area seemed every laid back. Just looking at it made me feel relaxed. Softly, I breathed, “Where are we?”

 

“Sorrento, Italy. The Italian coast has always been one of my favourite areas of Earth.” His voice softened as he added, “I always wanted to be here with you some day.” I glanced back at him for a moment as his eyes swept over the area, a soft smile on his face. After a moment, his eyes met mine and his smile grew. “Ready for dinner?”

 

I took his hand and he transported us closer to the town, not too close, though, so we got a chance to look at the town up close. I was still taken aback by the beauty of the area and I couldn’t help the way I was looking around at everything. It was also really my first trip anywhere, so I was enjoying the hell out of this opportunity. People swept to and fro, going about their daily business, chattering away in a language I couldn’t understand but that I appreciated. It flowed so beautifully and effortlessly from its speakers that I couldn’t help but listen in awe. English never quite sounded so graceful to my ear, though maybe it was just me. I was glad that Chuck was leading us because even if I’d looked at a route to wherever we were going, I would have gotten distracted almost immediately.

 

I felt him tug on my hand and I turned to see us approach an arched doorway, over which was a small sign that read _Ristorante Il Buco_. Right before we entered, however, he turned and said, “Oh, before I forget …” He didn’t quite finish, but instead raised his hand and swept his thumb over my temple. I was about to ask him what he was doing when all of a sudden my vision blurred for just a moment as I felt like I almost left my body. I blinked several time as my vision reasserted itself, as good as it ever had been.

 

I opened my mouth to ask him what he’d done when the host came to greet us and, I was surprised that even though it was clearly Italian that he was speaking, I understood him perfectly! I looked dumbly between him and Chuck as Chuck smiled and answered his question of if we had a reservation in the affirmative, giving him a name to look for. Once the host located the reservation, he lead us through the restaurant and to a table that was tucked away in a corner. When he left us, I turned to Chuck and asked, my voice low, “So I can understand Italian, now?”

 

He smirked. “Understand it, read it, speak it. Italian and any other language you wish. I unlocked it all up there for you.” I just sat there, slack-jawed at what he’d just done. He just kept smiling and winked at me. “Another one of the perks.”

 

I chuckled and shook my head at him, picking up the menu. “Bravo, sir, bravo.” I was a little surprised, but pleasantly so, to see that there were really tasty looking vegetarian options, even considering that we were in a coastal town in Italy that was no doubt replete with seafood. We ordered our different courses and took the waiter’s suggestion for wine pairing. Once I took a sip, I was very happy that he’d left the bottle at the table because it tasted divine. Chuck and I shared a wonderful, light back and forth as we casually ate through starters, two more courses after that, and then dessert. Between that and the bottle that we’d polished off together, I was feeling light and wonderful. Good wine, good food, good conversation all left me in a fantastic mood, all of my worries completely forgotten. There was just something about him and his presence that helped me relax. It was something I wanted to have around all the time.

 

When we finally sipped the last of the wine and the bill was squared away, I pulled my coat back on and followed Chuck out of the restaurant, my appetite fully sated likely for the rest of the day. I had to concentrate just a little to put one foot in front of the other, the wine definitely catching up to me, but I don’t think Chuck minded too much as to how I leaned on him just a little. When we rounded a corner, just out of sight of anyone, he transported us back to the remote cliffside location that we’d first landed at.

 

When the world re-opened around us, I gasped. Chuck had timed this perfectly, so that we landed right as the sun was going down. The sky was washed with reds and yellows that stretched across the horizon. The breeze had picked up a little and it picked up my hair around me and I took in the sight before me. I was actually glad I’d tied back part of it, as it probably would have been all over my face had I not. My brain couldn’t even come up with anything coherent to say, and I simply squeezed Chuck’s hand. He squeezed back, not even saying anything for the longest time as we watched the sun start to sink below the horizon. Finally, he whispered, “It’s nice to see some things I got right.”

 

I grinned. “You got quite a bit right, I think.”

 

I could practically _feel_ his eyebrows raise as he asked, “Really? _You_ of all people think so?”

 

“Why shouldn’t I?”

 

“Well, I mean … with the way you were raised …” he chuckled as he said, “… let’s just say I completely understand why you slapped me. And, I deserved it, I really did. I completely blew it.”

 

I turned to him, then, completely serious despite the high of the alcohol still going strong. “But you took responsibility for it. You helped me come to terms with it. Hell, you even did what you could to fix it. I wish it could have come sooner, sure, but you still did it when you didn’t have to.” I smiled as I added, “It’s the effort that’s important.”

 

His eyes looked glassy, or maybe that was just what I saw in my slightly inebriated state. Either way, I turned back to watch the sunset for a few more minutes, leaning my head against his shoulder. We stood there in silence, hand in hand, and in that moment it felt like all was at peace in the world. Even the breeze died down until I could barely feel it against my cheeks. The sun finally dipped below the horizon, the sky turning brilliantly red as it did so, and while I still had questions, I had a feeling that Chuck would be able to answer them all.

 

“So, what do we do now?” I asked, unsure exactly how else to broach the subject.

 

“What do you mean?” he asked.

 

“I mean …” I started, struggling with words for a moment. “Granted, I’ve never been in a serious relationship before, but from what I’ve seen … when humans get serious, they might move in together, or get a place together … merge their lives in some meaningful way. Get engaged, married, have children if they want. But … what do you do if one of the people in the relationship is _God_?”

 

I heard the rumble of his chuckle from where my head still rested on his shoulder. “Yeah, it’s not exactly a white picket fence existence with me. But, it’s better than that. At least, I hope you’ll think so.” He took a deep breath before he continued, “Whenever you decide - it’s completely up to you and your level of comfortability, by the way - then I’ll take you with me to heaven, and I’ll complete my work. By that, I mean, your soul will be made divine, as it’s always been meant to be. You’ll be … well, like me. And after that, you create your own niche for yourself.” He chuckled as he added, “Of course, I have a feeling where you’ll end up.”

 

I lifted my head from his shoulder. “What do you mean?”

 

He turned his head to glance at me out of the corner of his eye. “Why don’t I show you?” He jerked his head to the side, as if indicating a direction. “Come with me.”

 

“Where?”

 

“Heaven.”


	22. Chapter 22

I stood there, dumbfounded for a moment. Maybe my brain had misfired, maybe I had just misheard, but had he really asked me what I thought he just asked me? “Um, don’t I need to be, uh … dead … for that?”

 

He chuckled. “Not if you’re with me. What do you say?”

 

I gulped. This was a _huge_ step … wasn’t it? It kind of felt like it. For just a moment, I was rooted in fear, but then it settled and melted away. Why not say yes? I trusted Chuck, I knew he would take care of me, make sure I wasn’t hurt or anything. The whole idea was just … strange. _Well, that’s pretty much what my life has become lately, hasn’t it?_ “Sure.” I squeezed his hand as I added, a little bit softer, “Take me.”

 

He squeezed my hand back in response, his smile growing wider. “Let’s go home, then.”

 

This time, when everything winked out into darkness, it took a little longer to come back than it normally did. Everything usually came back pretty instantly, so when it didn’t my heart fluttered in my chest, a wave of anxiety threatening to crest. It wasn’t but a few moments after, however, that everything started to slowly come back into focus. The first thing I noticed was light and colour, everywhere, surrounding us. As things came more into focus, the sight before me took my breath away. We stood on lush, green grass, surrounded my colourful, fragrant flowers of all kinds. A light breeze carried over the plain, bending the plants, ruffling my hair. All of the colours were bright and vibrant, even more so than they would be on earth, almost impossibly so. It looked almost alien, in a way, but it wasn’t nearly so impressive as the sky.

 

Above, there was a light, coming from some central source that I couldn’t quite see. But all around it swirled colours that reminded me of an aurora, though I’d never seen one in real life. The closer to the light source, the bright and more abundant the colours were, and further away they faded off until I could see a sky of stars behind it. It was beautiful and entrancing and the more I stared, the more calm and at peace I felt. So this was heaven? I didn’t think I could have ever imagined anything quite so majestic.

 

I felt Chuck’s fingers brush against my own, his hand still holding mine. When he spoke, it sounded like his lips were right by my ear, his words were that loud and distinct as they echoed slightly. “Want to go inside?”

 

I was about to ask go inside _where_ , when I realized we were standing right beside a large stone structure that looked like it was carved out of white marble. It gleamed brightly with an otherworldly gleam, like some forbidden fruit that was irresistible. I say _structure_ only because _castle_ just didn’t quite seem to cover it. It was large and expansive, but not extravagant or gaudy. Quite the opposite. It seemed, from the outside at least, to be simple in design and decoration, content to let the excellent work stand for itself without distraction. “What is it?” I asked softly, barely able to speak above a whisper.

 

His chuckle rumbled in my ear. “It’s my home. And yours, too, whenever you choose.”

 

My eyebrows almost shot off my damn forehead. _That_ was a _home_? I was speechless.

 

I felt a tug on my arm. “Come on, come inside with me.”

 

Even if I’d wanted to, I don't think I could have resisted him if I tried. I was stunned into an awed silence by the unique majesty of my surroundings, and the only sound that followed us into the place was the click of my heels against the white stone. As we stepped through the entrance, I was no less impressed by the expansive atrium, decked out in all white. The stone and marble seemed to positively _glow_ , and it almost seemed like that was what lit the place. It must have been, because I couldn’t visually locate any other light source in the area. There was a quiet hush all around us, but I could somehow sense a subtle hum of activity elsewhere. “Is there … anyone else here?” I asked in a whisper.

 

Chuck nodded. “There are a few high-level offices for certain angels, but it’s a separate wing from the, uh … residential area.” He lead me down a corridor, then down another, walking so far and for so long I felt like I would be lost, except for the fact that we had only taken two corridors since entering. Maybe it was just the expanse of the place, the way it sprawled with seemingly no end, like it went on forever. Hell, maybe it did.

 

He finally stopped at a set of double doors, taking a moment to gently smile as he rested his hand on one of the handles. He turned to me and said, “This … this is where I think you’ll find yourself more often than not.” Before I could ask what room it was, he simply opened it and pulled me through with him. At first, the room seemed simple enough. Large sized, with several work tables scattered throughout, white sheets draped over what I assumed was … equipment? Of some kind? He let go of my hand and started pulling off sheets and … I gasped to see what was under them. Easels, paints, pencils, clay, pottery wheels, fabric, pins, sewing machines, old-fashioned parchment, quills, inks, just about anything and everything one could think of related to making something it seemed could be found in this room. With every sheet he lifted and discarded on the floor revealed more and more until I was just standing there in a stunned silence at the scope of what was contained in one seemingly simple room.

 

With the last sheet discarded, he crossed the room back to me, the smile wide on his face. He held out his arms as he said, “This is where I created … everything. The earth, the plants, the animals, everything within it. I designed each stage of evolution myself in a perfectly logical order.” He looked proud as he looked over the area, his gaze softening as his fingers whispered over a particular table. His voice was lower, softer as he said, “And this is where I made you. Sculpted you by hand.”

 

“So it’s a creating room,” I breathed, the full scope and breadth of the implications behind that hitting me.

 

“And so much more.” He stepped closer to me as he explained, “The reason I think you’ll like this place so much, is because you don’t just _create_ here … you _recreate_. You can fix and change anything else in existence. Not just living beings, but schools of thought, ideals, religion, anything you can think of.” He laid a hand on my shoulder and looked me in the eye. “You can change the whole world in this room, make it better, better in ways that even I can’t think of. This room … it’s my gift to you.”

 

I gulped, tears pooling in my eyes as I was floored by the profound honour Chuck had just given me. Such a deep level of trust that I wasn’t even sure I deserved. “You … you trust me with this?”

 

His answer was immediate. “Of course I do. Completely. No questions asked.”

 

I chuckled softly as I replied, “I’m not sure I quite deserve it.”

 

He smiled as he reached up to cup my cheek. “Of course you do. This room was meant for you, it always was. Your name … Kismet … it means _fate_. That’s no accident. The very concept of fate, of destiny, of a grand design, it was all coalesced, designed, and built into one being … _you_. You’re not just my soulmate, you’re my equal, half of a whole. I may have made you, but I made you to fit by my side, not at my feet. To help me shape the world into what it could be, the best version of itself, whatever you think that is. This … _this_ is what you were born for, what you were made for. _This_ is your purpose.”

 

His confession floored me. I had never, in my wildest dreams, thought that his plan for me would be this intricate or important. This was huge. He was literally handing me the world, to mold into what I thought it should be. Could I truly accomplish that? I wasn’t sure, but … something in me wanted to give it a shot. If I was honest, my fingers itched to lay a hand on these instruments, to get started on this work. It spoke to me, called out to me, not in a physical sense, instead it was like it reached out and touched something deep within the very core of me.

 

I was so lost in thought, I didn’t even see Chuck move until his lips touched mine, and then my eyes closed and I moved against him automatically, like a reflex. It was deep but tender and I could almost feel the strong thread that pulsed between us, drawing us together. He parted and simply rested his forehead against mine, pausing to whisper, “I know how big this is for you, leaving everything behind and making a new life here. Take your time, think it over. You can start whenever you want.” He smiled softly as he graced my forehead with a kiss. “No pressure. I promise.”

 

He didn’t bother to put the sheets back where they were as we walked out of the room, only closing the door behind us. I felt almost like I was in a daze, like I wasn’t quite sure what to do with myself. Even more than before, I felt like I was on the precipice of a huge, life-altering decision. And while I now had a much better idea of what lay in store for me, should I choose this, something in me still hesitated to step off the cliff and take that plunge. It puzzled me all the way back down to earth, back to my apartment, and later as I laid in a bath, just trying to gather and collect my thoughts. Where did I go from here?


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we have ... the penultimate chapter! Well, as long as the writing for the next chapter doesn't go so long that I have to split it LOL.

I sighed as I took another sip from my glass of wine, letting the heat of the bath seep into my bones. It was a little early in the day for some, but … fuck it, I had technically already been day drinking, a glass or two more wasn’t going to hurt anything. Lucifer had thankfully let me be, not interrogating me as I walked in as I was a little afraid he might. The archangel seemed content to give me space to process, and for that I was very grateful, as there was so much going on in my head it was hard to sort it all out.

 

This offer … okay, I wasn’t going to lie, this very tempting offer had been extended to be far and above anything I had dared dreamed of. In the cult I’d been raised in, all I could have looked forward to was marriage and babies and nothing else. I had been trained as a housewife, in cooking and cleaning and sewing and everything that would have made me a good hausfrau, a _helpmeet_ as they liked to put it. Giving a title like that made it seem so much more than it was, more important. Sure, that kind of work was important, but it was only fulfilling if it was truly a choice, and it wasn’t, at least not for us. I had always wanted more … I’d never been sure _what_ exactly I’d wanted, but I knew it wasn’t cleaning house and popping out babies.

 

When I left the cult, I hadn’t really had an opportunity to go to college like some. I’d gotten my GED and then gotten a job and started working, scrimping and saving to try to make a life for myself. I worked hard, put in the hours, saved the money, got a place for myself, kept working, got a better job, got a better place … I had fallen into a routine of sorts, working and coming home and cooking and watching TV, the monotony broken up only by occasionally going out and having some fun. One needed to just tear up the town sometimes, to distract from the dull norm. It was all I’d ever known, working … whether it was housework before I left the cult or a job afterwards, that was just life. Right? Sure I didn’t like working, but who did, really? It seemed rare for someone to actually like their job … rarer still for someone to like their job and have it be _secure_. That was the key … security. Once I left, I’d been so afraid I was going to fail, too afraid to take a chance, take a risk, go to college, explore the world. Perhaps if I had, I might be in a different position than I was now … for good or bad. The bad, of course, was what had deterred me, made me want to stick to the safe route. The good, though … I had been too scared to even imagine, really.

 

_A good job_. People liked to throw that around, especially to young people. _Do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life._ Of course, that wasn’t that profitable for everyone. But what was it that I liked to do? Sure, I didn’t mind my job now, it was easy, straightforward, it got me money, but office work wasn’t my passion. I did have a creative streak in me, I liked to sketch and draw but because of life circumstances that had never been much more than a hobby. It wasn’t for no reason that I liked to watch HGTV so much, I loved seeing the design process, how other people creatively changed a space or decorated it, what appealed to them and what didn’t, and how they made it work for them. Maybe, if I’d been born in a more secular family, I would have gone to school for it and become an interior decorator, much like Jeffrey. That was another life, though, a life that wasn’t mine. I had come to terms with that a long time ago, telling myself that lots of people stuck with jobs that didn’t speak to them on a personal level so they could survive. That was just how life was ... right? And, really, I was extremely lucky, considering the circumstances. I was salaried at a nice rate, had a nice apartment, had a great boss that I connected with well. That was far more than a lot of people had. I’d told myself that I’d been so lucky with that, how could I ever want more? It would be downright selfish, ungrateful to expect more …

 

Yet, here I was, at the cusp of that _more_ , and still I hesitated. This was, as I kept telling myself, a life-changing decision. And I wasn’t being dramatic by referring to it that way, I was being quite literal, actually. My entire life and everything and everyone in it would change. Was that really what I wanted? I’d have to give up my job, my coworkers, my friends, everything I’d worked so hard for once I’d escaped. But … was all of this what I really wanted? Ultimately? If I was given a choice to have a redo … heh, I’d nonchalantly pondered that for years, always feeling like I didn’t quite fit, like I belonged elsewhere. I’d brushed it off as a normal feeling after a while, but now … now it made sense. I didn’t feel like I belonged here because I _didn’t_ belong here. I didn’t fit because I wasn’t meant to. But could I really just up and leave everything I knew and chase after this dream of what I could be?

 

I drained my glass and decided I’d had enough wine and thinking. The water had cooled down enough to be slightly uncomfortable against my warm skin, so I pulled the drain and got out, toweling off before going ahead and dressing for bed. I wasn’t about to go anywhere as it was, no sense in dressing in anything more than my nightgown and a robe. After I deposited my glass in the sink, I readied some spaghetti squash for roasting before popping it in the oven. Squash had always been a big comfort food of mine, and I loved it however I could get it. Butternut, summer, spaghetti, whatever was available I nabbed it. Once it was in the oven, I emptied a jarred sauce and started doctoring it up, adding spices and herbs and cheese so it didn’t taste so store bought. I liked making my own, but sometimes it was just easier to fix up a jar of the stuff.

 

As I stirred and added and adjusted ingredients, my phone started ringing. I picked it up to see it was Steph’s number on the screen, so I didn’t hesitate to accept it and put it on speaker to allow me the free use of my hands. “Hey, Steph.”

 

“Kizzy, hey! Um, Renee and I were wondering if you’d like to come to brunch at Lush with us tomorrow? I mean, if you’re feeling up to it …”

 

She was referring, obviously, to my recent kidnapping, but I was pretty much over that by now. Probably because I had an archangel with me at all times, but hey, I wasn’t going to complain. The feeling of security was nice. And, maybe a little distraction with my friends at Sunday brunch was just what I needed to process things. “Sure! Sounds like fun. Usual time, 10am?”

 

“Yup, same as always,” she laughed. She paused for a moment, clearing her throat before she asked, “Hey, are you … are you alright? Like, really?”

 

“Yeah, yeah I am.”

 

“Cuz, I mean, you don’t have to come if you don’t want to.”

 

“I think getting out of here and hanging around with you two would actually help, if you know what I mean.”

 

“Sure,” she said, and I could hear the smile in her voice. “Well, we’ll see you tomorrow, then.”

 

I echoed her goodbye and then ended the call, giving the sauce one last stir before I covered it and set it to simmer. By the time the squash was ready, the sauce was, too, and I served it up with a hearty helping of cheese on top and a refill of wine. Because fuck it, might as well, right?

 

The next morning, I took Lucifer up on his offer to fly me to the club instead of taking a cab, and I slept in later than I normally would have. I still had plenty of time to get ready, even if all I did was brush through my hair, throw on minimal makeup, and pull on some skinny jeans and a sweater. We saved getting dolled up for clubbing at night, Sunday brunch was a lot more low key and casual. Besides, winter was really starting to settle in, and it was starting to get a little too cold to be cute, at least for us. Some girls stuck to mini skirts and short dresses well into sub-zero temps, but we were past that.

 

Lucifer dropped us about a block from the club, just far enough so our sudden appearance wouldn’t be conspicuous. He was, as usual, remaining invisible to everyone else. I was a little nervous, wondering if and how I would be able to bring up my current decision I needed to make with my friends while he was around, but I figured the bottomless mimosas would help lubricate the conversation somewhat.

 

I was the first one there, but Steph and Renee weren’t that far behind me, stepping in one right after the other. We barely even looked at the menu, knowing exactly what we were ordering. We always stuck to the same thing … Steph got the traditional Farmer’s Breakfast, Renee liked the Rainbow Waffles, and I got the Vegan Tofu Hash, because it was one of the few things that didn’t have meat. And, of course, we all got the bottomless mimosas, because who the hell exactly was coming to Lush for anything less?

 

With the good food and the plentiful drink, we all loosened up pretty quickly. They didn’t bring up the whole situation of my kidnapping and I was thankful. I didn’t know if they sensed I just didn’t want to talk about it or they felt too awkward to bring it up, but either way I seemed to win. Still, the weight of the decision hung over me and made me a little more reserved than I normally was at brunch, especially with limitless alcohol. If Steph picked up on it, she didn’t say anything, but Renee didn’t let it pass. “Kiz, you’re awfully quiet for brunch. Is something … wrong?”

 

I took a sip of mimosa for a little extra courage and cleared my throat. “Nothing, nothing _wrong_ really, just …” I sighed, not knowing quite how to word this … “Something’s come up.”

 

“Oh?” Renee asked, topping off her own glass. Steph simply sat there silently, waiting for me to go on.

 

“Yeah, um … I have a … a new job opportunity. It was floated to me by Chuck, and it seems really cush, but …”

 

“What’s the catch?” Steph asked, taking a bite of her last piece of sausage.

 

“I’d have to move. Like, pretty far. I’m not sure if and when I’d ever see you guys again.”

 

“Hmmhmm,” Renee hummed, licking whipped cream off of her fork. “So what’s the job.”

 

“Uh, it’s a design position.”

 

“Like, interior design?” Renee asked.

 

“Yeah, kinda.”

 

“Do you like that?”

 

“Are you kidding?” Steph interjected. “She watches HGTV like it’s going out of style.” She turned to me and said, “Look, change is scary, believe me I know. But if this is something you want, then you should go for it. Don’t worry about us or anyone else.”

 

“Yeah, I mean, people move all the time,” Renee said. “Besides, I’ve kind of been meaning to tell you guys …” She blushed and chuckled. “I’m moving back to Texas to take the bar there.”

 

The surprise of her confession caught me off guard. “Really?”

 

She smiled. “You guys know how much I hate the winter here, and how much I missed Texas. I was thinking of moving there _after_ , but … it just didn’t make much sense, ya know? So I’ll be moving next month. Already got an in at a firm down there.”

 

“Congratulations!” Steph exclaimed, before turning to me. “You see? People move all the time. It’s life. It doesn’t mean we won’t be friends anymore or keep in touch. Hell, even if we’re relegated to social media, we’ll still be there for you.”

 

“Are you worried about … Chuck?” Renee asked. “About your relationship?”

 

I didn’t reply and simply took another, long sip, but my silence said everything. Steph sighed and laid a hand on my arm. “Look, Kiz. If you were anyone else I would be telling you to take some more time to think about it, to be careful, to move slow. But you aren’t the kind of person to just lose your shit over someone and make rash decisions like leaving your job and up and moving. If this is something you really want, I say go for it. You’ve been playing it safe for too long, and life is too short for that.”

 

“You’re almost 30, Kizzy,” Renee added. “I don’t think you’ve done one thing just because you _wanted_ to do it.”

 

I nodded. They both had a point, after all. But still … “Isn’t this just a little bit strange? I mean, just meeting someone and like a month later I get a job offer through them and move away to be with them?”

 

Steph laughed. “Honey, _nothing_ is normal these days. If you’re happy, that’s all that really matters.” She fixed me with a stare as she asked, “ _Are_ you happy?”

 

I smiled softly. “Yeah, yeah I am.”

 

Renee let out an exasperated sigh. “Then _why_ are you still mulling this over? For Chrissake, Kiz, just do it!”

 

A weight felt like it was lifted off of my chest, replaced by a nervous - but happy - energy. “Okay, then. I’ll put in my notice at work and with my landlord. Gosh but it’s gonna be hard to say goodbye to Max.”

 

Steph’s eyes sparkled as she smiled. “I’m sure you’ll figure out a way.” Lucifer’s grin in the corner matched hers. I knew he’d overheard everything, and he knew exactly what I was talking about. I was going home.

 

All that was really left, then, was to tell Chuck I was on board. Once we all left the club and Lucifer flew me back to my apartment, I pulled up his number on my phone and dialed it. He answered with a hint of surprise in his voice. “Kiz? Hey, I wasn’t expecting your call.”

 

“Yeah, I know, I just … I needed to tell you something.”

 

“Oh?” He paused and let me continue at my own pace.

 

I took a deep breath to try to calm myself just a little as I said, “I’m ready. I’m ready to go home.” There was silence on the other end of the line for a moment, and I prompted, “Chuck?”

 

All of a sudden I was spun around and Chuck pulled me into his arms and into a passionate kiss. As he did, it felt like everything fell into place, like it _clicked_ , finally and … wow, it was just amazing. That pulsing ribbon of love I’d felt between us before sparked to life and pulled us together, linking us in our minds and our souls. It was like opening the door to a whole new realm of possibilities, each of them new and unique. I didn’t realize it until later, but that was our bond, our soulmate bond. And with that, I just felt … complete.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And, this is it. It's done, over with. I'm hoping y'all enjoy the conclusion. :)
> 
> Also, thanks to the lovely people in the AO3 Facebook group, I've found some apps that are really helpful for making graphics for stories, and so I've been making them for some of mine. I'll be adding them back to the first chapter of each story. When I do, I'll post about it on my tumblr, under the same name I use here, emmadilla, along with the graphic itself if you wanna take a look. :)
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

The next day, I handed in my resignation to Max. He teared up and hugged me, and invited me to one last dinner at his house before I left. I was worried he might protest too much, but when I explained how I felt … I think he understood. He was understandably sad to see me go, but he was happy for my opportunity. Likewise, my landlord wasn’t exactly happy to see me go. I’d gone on a month-to-month lease a long time ago, and I was one of her most stable and reliable tenants. I made doubly sure that the white paint covered all of the wards that had been made and that the apartment was extra clean before I left. I ended up donating everything of mine, just because I didn’t know quite what else to do with it. I would be long gone before my landlord released my deposit, and for that I set up a separate bank account and gave the information to the Winchesters. It would be over a grand, at least, and I knew they could use it more than me. They tried to protest, but I wouldn’t hear it. They deserved some sort of compensation for the warding that they’d done when I ended up not even being there a whole month after they did it.

 

The night before Chuck and I left, we celebrated, wanting to share our joy with those closest to us. Even though I didn’t really _know_ the Winchesters, they had been instrumental in bringing Chuck and I together, and also helping me out when it was needed, so it was another small way to say thank you. And nothing says thank you to big mountains of men like taking them out for a steak dinner. Even the angels, who didn’t usually eat, dined with us, Chuck even adopting vegetarian fare for himself because of me. He would not be rebuffed no matter what I told him, so I shrugged and enjoyed the the Rollatini with him. Between all of us, we had more than our share of wine, and I was very glad that we hadn’t even taken a car as I doubted even the angels were completely sober. Everybody gathered back at the bunker via angel flight - except for myself, of course, who had the fortune of skipping the dizzying sensation. It was wonderful, really. We felt like a real _family_. It was something I’d never known before, and the more I reveled in the feeling I found the more I craved it.

 

We all parted and went our separate ways, and I followed Chuck back to his room, eager for the next morning. After our link had finally fallen into place fully, I loved being around him, so much so that I felt like I never wanted to leave his side at all. Now that we’d bonded, I couldn’t picture life without him. Even now, our fingers had intertwined, keeping us touching even in the barest of ways, like we couldn’t bear to be separated. I knew I couldn’t at least. It felt like a great relief had finally settled through me and I was at peace. Peace with life, the universe, and with everything going on in it. Any other worries I’d had were completely pushed aside, and now in retrospect they seemed so small and insignificant. They had been important at the time, obviously, but still … I understood now. Because of the intensity, I was surprised that Chuck had been able to resist and give me my space so much. It just added another level of respect for him that he was able to fight his natural urges in order to make me comfortable, because I swear if I was able to attach myself to his side I would have. Chuck had said that was to be expected, because our bond was new, and that it would even out over time. But right now all I wanted was his skin against mine, in any possible way. I nuzzled into his neck as he closed the door behind us, and I felt the rumble of his chuckle in his chest as he turned his head to kiss me. I swear I felt like I just melted away as his arms wrapped around me, pulling me flush to his body and I responded in kind with the way his lips moved. When they drifted from my lips and down my neck, I shuddered at the sensation, feeling goosebumps spring up all over my body. I swear his voice did something otherwordly to me as he whispered in my ear, “Was there anything else on earth you wanted to see before you left? Anywhere at all …”

 

The way he crooned left me weak in the knees. I whispered back, “No, I think I’d rather spend the time with you.”

 

“With me? But you’ll have me for all eternity.”

 

I licked my lips and gathered the gumption within me to reply with, “Well I figure no use leaving earth a virgin.”

 

He pulled away with a surprised expression on his face. “You … you never …”

 

I blushed and looked away. “I rarely even got to a second date, much less anything else.”

 

His hand reached up to caress my cheek. “Are you sure you want to? We don’t have to.”

 

I sighed and looked him in the eye. “Chuck, I’ve been waiting my whole life for a connection like this. I’d given up hope years ago I would find anything even remotely this good. I’m tired of waiting.”

 

Chuck pulled me in for a passionate kiss as I toed my brown boots off and reached for the hem of my green sweater dress, separating us for only a moment as I pulled it off in one fell swoop. The cool air made me shiver slightly, and I was suddenly shy standing there in nothing but my skivvies, but the smouldering look he was giving me made me bold enough to step forward and lock my lips with his. I let my hands wander down across his chest, intending on unbuttoning his shirt and taking it off, but I was surprised to suddenly feel bare skin. I looked down and was surprised to see that, indeed, what my fingers had told me wasn’t a lie. I quirked an eyebrow as I looked up at him. “God powers?”

 

He smiled somewhat sheepishly and shrugged. “Can’t help it sometimes.”

 

I chuckled as he pulled me close, and the feel of such a large swath of bare skin touching was almost overwhelming for a moment. He seemed fine with taking the lead, his hand reaching around and unhooking my bra before he pulled it off and laid me down on the bed. His lips roamed everywhere, hitting sensitive spots I didn’t even know I had as he worked his way down my body. As he knelt at my feet, holding one of them in his hand as he’d kissed down that leg, his tongue darted out and I gasped at the way it made me shiver, like it sent a shock straight to my clit. His teeth gently grazed my foot and I moaned, simply putty in his hands. He repeated his treatment on my other foot before he kissed back up my legs and snapped, disappearing my underwear. I was so incoherent, riding almost drunk on pleaser, that I couldn’t even begin to wonder where he’d sent them.

 

The first flick of his tongue against my lips had my cramming my fist into my mouth and biting down because if I hadn’t, I would have been making some very loud, unholy noises. “Don’t,” he whispered. “Don’t worry about anyone hearing.”

 

I half chuckled as I said, “Don’t tell me you can muffle this room.”

 

“I’m God, what do you think?” he asked before he licked another strip up and down my outer lips, just teasing the hood around my clit without directly stimulating it. He worked me into a mess, just teasing the edge for me without granting it. I swore I was going mad with desire, wondering just how long he was going to tease me like this. It was when I thought I could take it no more that climbed up my body and pressed his lips against mine in a searing kiss, taking the opportunity to align himself. He pulled away ever so slightly, just enough so our noses were almost touching still, and locked his eyes with mine as he slowly entered me.

 

His size took my breath away, but I was somewhat surprised that it didn’t hurt like I had been expecting it to. Later I realized that was why he’d spent so long teasing me, getting me nice and wet enough so that he could slid into me with minimal discomfort. Even so, once he was fully seated, he stilled, letting me adjust, peppering my face and my neck with tiny kisses until the pressure turned pleasurable, and then he started to move.

 

It was a good thing he had muffled the room, because I was pretty damn sure I could be heard at the other end of the bunker. Every stroke, every hitch, every motion wasn’t wasted. He knew every trick that would turn me on and drive me wild. And why shouldn’t he? He’d made me, after all, knew everything about me. I was the one at a disadvantage, planting kisses and licks where I could and trying to note his reaction, if any. When I grazed his collarbone with my teeth, I swore he let out what sounded like a whimper. Imagine that, the god of the universe, whimpering at _my_ virginal ministrations.

 

Well, not so virginal anymore.

 

Our soulmate link only intensified the experienced. Through it, we could feel exactly what the other was feeling. There was a faint physical edge to the sensation, but most of it was emotional. Arousal, passion, love. We fed off of one another, back and forth, the link and the emotional aspect only pushing things further in the physical aspect. Feeling both his emotions and mine as he rocked back and forth inside me made me tremble with the intensity, and as with him I neared that end a lot quicker than I thought I would have. Chuck later explained that soulmates often don’t last very long the first time they have sex, the first time experiencing the physical act with a soulmate bond is often too intense for anyone, even him to resist. But no matter the length of our passion, when I finally crested and my whole world narrowed to exclude everything but Chuck … it was worth it. And I could tell that he agreed as he shook and met his own end only a few minutes after mine, burrowing his face in the crook of my neck as he did. I reached up to run my fingers through his curls, offering support as we both came down from our respective highs. I had always set myself up for the fact that my first time probably wouldn’t be all that great, based on the stories my friends had told me. But this … fuck, if this was considered _bad_ then I didn’t know how I was going to handle the good.

 

We both slept soundly that night, curled up in each others arms naked, clean and dry only because of Chuck’s divine power, because there was no way in heaven or hell that either of us was budging after that.

 

The next morning, I woke before he did, but I couldn’t find it in myself to move from my spot. I simply nuzzled his chest and settled back into his arms, enjoying the feel of our skin on skin contact. He was still dreaming, and it seemed like a good dream from what I could sense, so I just smiled and laid there and waited for him to wake on his own. I dozed off and on until I could finally sense his dream start to dissipate as he slowly woke up, his chest expanding as he yawned. Even though my eyes were still closed, I could feel his gaze on me, and I opened them to see his piercing blue eyes fixed on me face. I smiled sleepily, about to wish him good morning when he leaned over for a kiss, this time soft and chaste. He reached up brush a few errant hairs out of my face before he said, soft and low, “It seems a shame that I waited so long. Waking up to see you, to _feel_ you … it’s unlike anything I’ve ever experienced.”

 

I smiled and blessed the end of his nose with a peck. “All good things in time.”

 

After we rather reluctantly hauled ourselves out of bed and said our goodbyes to the Winchester brothers - along with Castiel and Gabriel, who would be staying with them - Chuck took my hand and looked me in the eye. “Are you ready?”

 

I squeezed his hand back. “More than ready.”

 

The world darkened as he transported us to heaven, and when reality reasserted itself, I was a little surprised to find that we were standing in the creation room. Before I could even ask, he explained, “This is where you were created, and so this is where I finish my work.” He let go of my hand and smoothed his other over a seemingly innocuous table before he looked up at me. “It won’t hurt, I promise, but it will be rather … strange. For you, at least.”

 

I nodded. “I trust you. I’m not afraid.”

 

The smile that spread across his face was positively beaming as he held his hand out to me to help me onto the table. I tucked my white sundress under me as I laid down, crossing my arms at my waist and taking a deep breath. “Just relax. Close your eyes, and don’t open them until … well, you’ll know.”

 

“Why?”

 

“I’m going to be leaving my vessel, if you open your eyes before I can pull your soul out of your body, it’ll instantly kill you.”

 

My eyebrows shot up just a little. “Duly noted.”

 

A few seconds later, the room was filled with a light so bright, I could see it from behind my eyelids. I scrunched my eyes shut, not wanting to risk accidentally opening them even a crack because of his warning. I gasped as the oddest sensation took hold, like something was reaching _inside_ of me. It wasn’t painful, as Chuck promised, but it was the weirdest thing I think I’d ever felt. That, however, was immediately replaced by the next part, as I felt like that something was slowly extricated from my body.

 

As it was, the light seemed to shine brighter and brighter around me. I realized that was because my eyes were open, and I panicked for a second until I realized that no … my eyes weren’t open, because my body was underneath me. Chuck certainly lived up to his promise when he said it would be strange, because this was simply unlike anything I could have ever even imagined. I could see everywhere, all around me, and above me was Chuck as I had never seen him before.

 

Even in his vessel, there was this vibe that he gave off that was just _different_. Outside of it, it was a whole different animal entirely. He was wholly brilliant and beautiful and amazing and about a thousand other adjectives that my human brain could come up with along with a few thousand that I couldn’t even comprehend.

 

Yet, that is.

 

He physically reached out to me, and I, in turn, reached for him, as if on instinct. Where we connected, it felt like a jolt of electricity and I would have gasped, had I a physical voice to do so with. From his end, I could feel an immense power flowing, from him into me, until it felt like I was about to burst. If I’d had lungs, I wouldn’t have even been able to breathe, the pressure was so intense. Again, it wasn’t painful … just strange. I belatedly realized that in order to turn my soul divine, he was literally funneling some of his own power into me. If there was an outer seal around my soul, I felt it cracking, and I mildly started to panic until he pushed reassurance to me through our bond. After that, I simply felt at peace. Whatever would happen would happen, and Chuck was in complete control. The cracks around the seam grew and grew until finally I felt it shatter and suddenly I felt big, bigger than ever, expanding and growing, reshaping and growing brighter and brighter myself until the brilliance matched Chuck’s own. We stayed there for a moment, floating in the air above our vessels, each taking in the sight of the other in ways that we never had before. This moment was the sum total of both of our lives, twisting and turning on the path that led us here. But this … this was inevitable.

 

It was fate.

 

After we had drank each other in, we slowly descended back into our bodies, our vessels. In making me divine, my vessel was now eternal as well, and sliding back into it was somehow second nature, even though I had never done it before. Once I was back, everything settled back into place like a jolt, and my eyes shot open as I gasped, working my lungs once more. If being able to see all around me all at once and not needing to breathe was stranger, stranger still was coming back into a vessel after having experienced that. I blinked a few times, getting the feel of my body back before I stretched and sat up. Chuck was already at my side, helping me down off the table, and already I could see a huge difference. It was similar to when we had first met, when he’d fixed my eyesight and I could see things, patterns and details that I hadn’t been able to see before, even with vision correction. This time, however, this was significantly different. I saw how everything was bonded together, how they fit together, their beginnings and their ends. Now, even more than before, I saw the vast potential of this room, but instead of being overwhelmed, I was inspired. Motivated. But all in good time.

 

I looked up at Chuck and was almost startled to see how different he looked. How similar and yet different. I could see the vessel, of course, but I could see _beyond_ it, his true face. That glory now shone through and I could _see_ it and it was breathtaking. We stood there, staring at each other in amazement before I both heard and sensed two presences enter. I turned to see Michael and Lucifer and was surprised at how different they looked as well. Michael looked like a true prince, regal and almost frightening in his splendor. And Lucifer … Lucifer was bright and brilliant and beautiful, majestic and astounding. Even more amazing was the fact that I could see their wings for the first time … both had three sets of them, Michael’s a brilliant white that almost blinded, Lucifer’s a gradient that started with a dark maroon at the base and ended with a light pink at the tip. There was no need to tell them that it was finished, they could see for themselves, I knew they could. Just like I could see the true faces behind the vessels, they could do the same for me. Michael smiled softly, with a quiet radiance that denoted happiness and contentment. Lucifer’s was beaming, as bright as the sun as he whooped and then took off, flying across heaven as he yelled on a frequency that was new and foreign and yet utterly familiar all at the same time.

 

Beside me, Chuck smiled, as content and complete as I was. I turned to face him and return it, and he lowered his head to just barely brush his lips over mine. As he pulled back, he stared deep into my soul as he whispered, “Welcome home.”


End file.
